by learning instruments and singing then starting or joining bands.

It’s long been known that there are far more single women than single men among seniors. I was not aware that the reverse was true for those 18-60. This isn’t China where birth control policies produced a massive oversupply of men.

There simply are not tens of millions of lesbian couples to make up that difference between the number of single men and single women.

However, the other point was younger women marrying older men.

So there should be an oversupply of older unmarried women who are either divorced or never married, if the numbers are correct.

So probably not a major factor in the imbalance between young single men and young single women.

than the man supposedly in the same "relationship".

Also the same man might be "in a relationship" with a number of women. And some women will be in relationship with an older man.

This flips for seniors because men die earlier and more old men are with younger women.

I remember this guy telling me he had five women. I wondered if each of them thought he was their boyfriend.

Very cynical in the 80s where it was all opportunism. No romance, that wasn't allowed.

Men older than 20 which explains the numbers.

Like an older man. By this logic it will all work out sooner or later.

will find it increasingly difficult to find a mate their age or older.

mentions women marrying older men and lesbians. Maybe
successful divorced men remarry younger women and their ex wives do not remarry as often? Something like that.

That 30 point gap is impossible to reconcile any other way and my anecdotal observations suggest it simply is not true. The math and reality simply does not add up.

While I certainly think there is some truth to the survey, there is no way that 30 points more men are single than women. I might believe a 5 or even 10 point differential but not 30 as that would require 30-40 million if not more such older man/younger woman relationships. I just don't see it.

So many men (and women) go for them.

How does that work?

Out of 100 men, 40 are in a relationship.

Out of 100 women, 70 are in a relationship.

Who are the 30 excess women in a relationship with? Are they Polyandrists?

There is always that

Last edited Thu Feb 23, 2023, 10:03 AM - Edit history (1)

Women marry men who are older than they are. 104 boys are born for every 100 girls. Used to be that number would be equal after young men thinned themselves out due to hunting accidents, war and farm injuries amongst other dangerous jobs and self harm young boys/men are known for.

Another way, of course, is to groom young pre-lebians with woke libary books about seahorses. Burn the libarys.

defunct (as far as I know) group:

Meem (in Arabic م ) is a Lebanese LBTQ women's group that was founded in August 2007, the first ever lesbian organization established in the Arab World. The full name is مجموعة مؤازرة للمرأة المثليّة, (translated as Support Group for Lesbian Women). The name "Meem" is derived from the Arabic letter م (the letter m, which is called "meem" ). The letter "meem" as an initial for the word lesbian (in Arabic مثليّة ) also symbolizes the anonymity of lesbians in the Arab world. Membership in Meem is restricted only to LBTQ women who are Lebanese (anywhere in the world) or living in Lebanon (of any nationality).

World War 3.

China especially with its glut of males.

Oh my!

Once is a typo, two times is suspect.

And, lesbians are not "a growing number" -- what does that even mean.

Hell, I remember my thirties. And yeah, I was young.

Plenty of excess though!

Men who are older than 20.

The old way is dying along with religion.

of those young men behave with women would count for some of that. Many young women I know never intend to marry, they are thinking of their future. They can do anything they want being single and still have the life they want. Not so much if you get married.

This might be outdated or debunked now, but I was always under the impression that historically, a large population of single young men usually leads to violence and wars. There is actually a name for this theory but it escapes me right now. Any history or sociology buffs know?

And it was talking about china and their one child policy resulting in a gender imbalance and that neighboring India has the same problem. I remember it quoting both US and Chinese gov officials worrying that 2 populations with a large surplus of men, who have absolutely no chance of getting married, was a recipe for disaster.

I had a lot of self confidence issues and insecurity. (I still do but I gotten a lot better since) I believe most young men don't work on making themselves into better men. When I transitioned from male to female. I don't know, I felt so much happier in my skin and boom I had no problems finding a girlfriend or date. It is self confidence and being a good person that will lead you to happiness.

Many of us as young girls had problems with that. While struggling with our sense of self, as boys do as well, we then get hit with the menstruation whammy, which boys do not.

Glad to hear you’ve found happiness and have had no problems with dating. Believe me, many women (of all ages) do.

When I started taking hormones and blockers. It felt like second puberty again and for the better reasons. It helped my brain readjust into how I always felt and for the better.

I was never very fond of my hormones, at the beginning, the middle, or the end. Nothing but trouble!

Happy to be an older woman now.

There are very few physical places in all of America for people to meet and interact with the opposite sex where they can develop social skills. This is the end result of creating isolated, car-dependent suburbia. There aren't enough outlets for young people to meet each other in social settings. Time spent in school is either in class or after school activities. We use to attend church, but attendance is way down, and we don't have that "3rd place", a local pub, a social club, not even a hangout spot like the mall which are closing.

I don't own a dog, but I've heard experts say that it's important for dog owners to socialize their dogs around other dogs and people. This is also very true for young humans as well.

Now, it is common for people to not drive period until they at least 20 plus years old. Most people at one time honed their social skills in HS, college, or at work. People also didn't sit and stare at their phones for most of the day.

Back then, very few parents would permit their adult children to stay living at home for years after graduating from school. Now......

They are driven around by their parents. They are not allowed to go too far away from the house. So, they've become more insular. Most of their young lives are spent either in the home or in school. So, they've adapted to entertaining themselves at home with video games and social media.

Again, this is the consequence of creating physical infrastructure that prioritizes the automobile over human interactions.

It is a different world. We were expected to entertain ourselves; our parents schedule didn't revolve around what we wanted to do. Very few activities were scripted and scheduled. Something changed.

The video at the link explains my position. It's based on the book, "Bowling Alone" by Robert Putnam

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bowling_Alone

I had a car at 16.

A good used car.

Also a summer job.

We got around on our own.

We lived in different worlds from our parents.

Worked a full time summer job but simply it was time to go off on my own and I told my parents I wouldn’t be back that next summer.

Loved my parents dearly, but I wanted my own rules not theirs anymore. They understood and said they raised me for this moment to come.

There is also a maturity factor.

By 25 my Father was a grown man with a wife and three kids and a WW2 veteran.

A 25 year old male today unless maybe if he has been in the military or had some life experiences is not so mature


I have interviewed people since 1979.

Started doing it in the Union.

All the way from Boomers to Gen Z.


There is a marked difference.

I saw this years ago.

I'm in the boomer category and the idea that I would be in my mid 20's and still living with my parents was revolting. People who did that would be widely ridiculed.

What 21 year old today can get a job that pays enough for them to afford housing at 30% of their income less then a one hour commute from work? Not many and not for lack of trying.

AC was our one luxury.

We ate home alot.

We could all cook.

But it was Austin.

I moved on at 19.

Couldn't wait.

The young women we interview are mature but young men not so much.

The young men who are vets are very mature.

One young man helped raise his young siblings with his grandparents and he was mature.

But most of the young men are still teenagers still mentally.

This isn't a put down but the way it is.

If there are approximately the same number of young men and young women, the math doesn’t work out, unless you include lesbian and polygamous relationships, as well as asexual individuals.

Including same sex relationships still doesn’t make the math work, as those women, unless bisexual, wouldn’t be a part of the pool available to be in a relationship with a single man.

My math guesstimate says of the 60% of young women who aren’t single, half of them (30% of the total) would need to be in same sex/polygamous relationships to account for the 60% of single men.

Is my calculator broken?

Edit to add:
I didn’t think about younger women in relationships with older men- but still, that would mean half of non-single women were in relationships with older men, other women, or polygamous relationships.

For those young women who want to be married and start a family, they will go for men who are economically established enough to be the primary/sole provider. Most men in their 20s won't be in that position until they're in their 30s or later in life.

Seriously????????????????

This place is just so out of touch in so many ways, including half this thread. Including everyone wailing about these horrible kids who can't afford 2500K for a one bedroom.

My God.

I work with college kids, and maybe talk to young women how they are treated by young men, and that is why many are not interested in immature, entitled young men who are "nice guys." ie not nice guys.

There are women in their 20s who prioritize marriage and family over education and a career. They tend to want to be with a man who is in a position to provide for a family. That favors older men over young men in their 20s. The vast majority of young men are not nearly established enough to be the primary or sole provider for a family.

Our economy, which is the least regulated of all developed nations, is disadvantageous to young people who want to be married and start a family in their 20s.

There are plenty of older men who are into gaming and are married with children. It's not gaming. It's the lack of well paying jobs that enable young men to be the primary provider for a family.

Men who are so prone to adrenaline or dangerous jobs choices (not always a choice) in the past that historically 104 boys are born for every 100 girl babies. Then they evened out in adulthood.

Plenty of adrenaline or dangerous jobs choices today for young men.

Here is a message I got, last night, after I saw he had returned after being gone a month. I asked if he was ok. This is the message he replied NSFW) I'm about to hold you down and make you choke on my dik my long dik I'm going down your throat with it! then I'm going to spin your fat ass around and stick my dik up your ass!

Yeah, so the guy wants to rape me. I just don’t think he is boyfriend material! By the way, I reported him to the game people. They gave me a warning, for my response to being threatened with rape.

I'm a female lol I love gaming. My girlfriend enjoys it too. Gaming isn't the problem.

because he wanted to game. They broke up. She found someone else. I'm not putting an addiction to a computer or game down. Look at me.

You gotta have a disconnect in your brain to limit yourself. Some do not have that ability. Normally I will sit at the PC and play for 2 hours tops before shutting it down for the day. But I'd happily give up gaming if my girlfriend wants to get serious and start a family. That's always something I wanted.

The number of Japanese women getting married and having children decreased year after year after year and the Japanese government (men) was mystified. Why did it happen? Because women could get jobs after the age of 25 and have children without getting married first and they had other choices.

Don't understand the idea that young people who want to be married and start a family can't do so because of capitalism.

Most people in their 20s, who don't go to college, are not going to make enough money to provide for a family until they're in their late 20s or early 30s.

Young people didn't make that much money in 70's.

Nothing wrong with living at home if you pay some rent and help out.

Three generations were normal when I was a kid.

The days of dropping out of high school and getting a good paying job putting lugnuts on new cars at GM or Ford are gone.

A good chunk of these guys simply don’t have the aptitude to go much beyond a high school diploma and get the education required to obtain the modern well paying technology jobs. Not everyone can be a computer programmer, for example.

They will be stuck in low paying, subsistence work for the rest of their lives which makes them prime targets for radicalization for con artists like Dump.

What about them?

They are going to be a big problem worldwide in the coming years.

Motivation is the issue.

We have a three year apprenticeship program.

We have helped a lot of people make it

We have a GED program for those without a high school diploma.

A lot of young mothers have gone thru this program.

But it it takes work and motivation.

That is why we have tough interviews.

We got to know that you are willing to do the work.

Some is better than none.

That might explain why they are like that already

I work with kids this age. All the replies in this thraed saying women want a man with money so they can get married is just.... sexist and outdated. like wtf is this thread?????

Those are generally well paying jobs. For those who attend college, as an example, they can earn a degree in Engineering or Automation before they are 23, and start a great career.

According to the OP, it isn't like they are trying to build a relationship and can't find the right person, they aren't interested in even trying.

This is not new, once there's more equality in pay and work place and higher cost to raise children there are less children.

East Germany fixed this by making children cheaper / more convenient to have and raise.

The day of the man being sole provider is over when women can peruse passions and careers and make nearly as much money.

MAGA hates that, being at the top of the money chain is where they feel they're entitled

Because now she has to decide if being a struggling single mom is better or worse than being with an abusive asshole who helps pay the bills.

Explains the right's hatred of abortion AND birth control.

She decided it was better that way than to be with an adulter. My sperm donor as I will rightfully call him was very mentally abusive to me. She took the chance to raise me alone and she did really well. I know everyone doesn't have that chance, but she did okay.

Even after my dad tried to choke her out, my 14 yr old sister broke a coffee mug across his head to get him off her, and I pointed a loaded hunting rifle at him to get him out of the house until the cops came.

Once I went off to college she finally left him for good, and after a few years of struggling, found out that life as a single mom wasn't as terrifying as she thought it would be.

I can't imagine how hard that must have been on all of you

The odds will start to flip in your favor in your 30's, and you don't have to beat a biological clock, either. You just need to be a decent, stable person who showers and wears clean clothes and trims your nose hair and earns a steady paycheck.

It will drive down birth rates even faster.

8 billion is too many.

and this is nothing new. I've read accounts from the 17th century cautioning widows not to remarry because they lose everything (femme covert status) - the man takes it and a great many of them just pissed it away. Women who had a stable income, a trade or 'mystery' frequently had no intention of remarrying at widowhood - women are social and build networks naturally. And they were not thieved of everything but their own souls by a patriarchal society - they can direct their own course - within their framework, yes (we all live within our time), but with a lot more freedom.

This has not changed.

Also it's a myth that women over 30 have trouble finding partners - it's a very common age to marry. Not single does not necessarily mean married.

Too many men are raised with Peter Pan and Little Emporer Syndrome. Fortunately, my own opinion is that they're not the majority.

Also, statistics are malleable things.

"One explanation for why the GOP men are in a frenzy to end all abortions, as women may be more likely to have an abortion if the men are more patriarchal and less educated, their next genration of assholes will be smaller in number. That will maker for fewer GOP voters."

they agitate the base to vote on policy that helps the GOP gain power.

I was "romantically uninvolved" in my late 20s and I am still "romantically uninvolved" in my 30s.

That's me, a lot of this in that article is me.

Why? College degree, stable work history, managerial position, etc.

For me, a lot of this is now personal choice. I would rather be single than be in a pretend relationship. It is a hard choice, but I think I would rather be single than be in an unhappy relationship formed only out of desperation.

It also feels financially prohibitive to be in a relationship. Everything today costs so much money and make a mistake in any avenue of life and it becomes devastating. I simply can't afford a relationship.

Emotionally, I also had an ex, nobody is like her. I mulled it over so many times in my head, I figured that if money wasn't a problem, then maybe it would have worked out. I simply don't have the urge to seek a relationship that I see as less satisfying. It's hard to conjure up feelings for the dating pool.

In short: I am not in a relationship and I do not plan to be in one and I am not anxious about not being in a relationship.

My brother lost the love of his life, as he described it, because she was from a wealthy upper class family and he said she just couldn't understand that he wasn't rich and never would be, that she'd go shopping and come home with cashmere throws for the sofa and so on. But why did she expect anyone else to pay for anything? Who does that? This is completely alien to me. I think it's a tiny tiny minority of people who do this.

who report they are not.

the men had their careers to establish. The women were ready for their "career" as housewife earlier. So if anything, it may have improved from what it was.

... and they fixed it with skinny dipping everywhere and making it easy and cheap to have children.

It's based on the book, "Bowling Alone" by Robert Putnam


https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bowling_Alone