General Discussion
Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsMy boobs, my burden
I thought that with cleavage came power. But as my breasts swelled to a 32G, I found the opposite to be true
http://www.salon.com/2014/02/24/my_boobs_my_burden_partner/
Response to itsrobert (Original post)
Post removed
itsrobert
(14,157 posts)I don't have this problem, but by reading the article I can see how someone can feel uncomfortable. Especially a young teen.
aikoaiko
(34,185 posts)On Sun Feb 23, 2014, 08:00 PM an alert was sent on the following post:
Do you have any comments on the article, robert?
http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1002&pid=4553573
REASON FOR ALERT
This post is disruptive, hurtful, rude, insensitive, over-the-top, or otherwise inappropriate.
ALERTER'S COMMENTS
Using a sexist term for a personal attack.
JURY RESULTS
You served on a randomly-selected Jury of DU members which reviewed this post. The review was completed at Sun Feb 23, 2014, 08:14 PM, and the Jury voted 5-1 to HIDE IT.
Juror #1 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: No explanation given
Juror #2 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: DU member Sheldon Cooper should read the salon article to find out there is a real woman expressing herself and not reduce her to her "titties".
Juror #3 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: rude hurtful and inappropriate
Juror #4 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: No explanation given
Juror #5 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: Sheldon is fine, the thread itself needs to be trashed.
Juror #6 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: I'd like to hide the OP and the post, please. Misogynist drivel everywhere I turn.
Thank you very much for participating in our Jury system, and we hope you will be able to participate again in the future.
Response to itsrobert (Reply #3)
PotatoChip This message was self-deleted by its author.
BainsBane
(53,112 posts)and your post isn't? What's the disgrace? Is one slang term for breasts so much worse than another? Or it the disgrace in asking if you have a point? Well, your point is perfectly obvious, but let's pretend for a minute that you do care about the article. Why don't you share with us all what it's like to have large breasts and shop for bras, since you find the topic so fascinating? Why did you think this particular article was of interest to DU?
Old and In the Way
(37,540 posts)Amazing, isn't it? This poster should have run it by you, as you speak for everyone on this board.
BainsBane
(53,112 posts)Since this is DU, and he posted it on DU, one would presume he thought it of interest to the membership. Do you think it outrageous to ask why? Or are you simply upset someone sees through the games? I assure you, most people do.
Old and In the Way
(37,540 posts)That's mighty authoritarian of you. Again, what "most people" here think is really something you have no way of knowing.
BainsBane
(53,112 posts)I assume most DUers are cogent, and given the hundreds of recommendations denouncing the misogyny on this site, they have made clear they know exactly what is going on.
As for my first post, it assumes nothing. It asks a question. Most OPs engage in a discussion about articles and why they find them interesting. This OP has chosen not to do that. I asked him what he found interesting about this article and why he felt others would find it interesting. You want to make a major issue about that, have at it. You're obviously looking for a fight. You'll need to find someone else to have it with because I'm through. This claiming to speak for everyone trope is old, transparent bullshit. What you mean to say is who are you to think you can speak at all. Who I am is a human being who will speak whenever I feel like it. Deal with it.
Old and In the Way
(37,540 posts)It assumes everything. You don't get (and none of do) to speak for every poster at DU.
If you had asked, "why do you think this particular article was of interest to me?", I would understand that. And the obvious answer would be "it obviously wouldn't be". But in your question, you imply that this is what everyone at DU is asking. You might speak for 188 people (or whatever the number is you are using to extrapolate a majority on a rec thread), but last time I checked there were well over 100,000 individual accounts here and that in no way gives you any authority to speak for the entire board. Very presumptuous of you.
On edit: If you want to correct your post to "to me", instead of "to DU", I will be happy to delete my comments to you in this sub-thread..
uppityperson
(115,681 posts)her in the face instead of staring at the huge boobs. I hugged her and started laughing because our faces were close to each others.
Glad insurance pays for what it does, hoping more women in need of health care can get it.
ismnotwasm
(42,022 posts)After her husband rolled over In bed and was literally laying on them. She is very happy with the reduction.
Ms. Toad
(34,123 posts)The article is actually quite thoughtful.
I wish it had not been posted the way it was - with a headline which seems designed as flamebait, and sentence from the article which does not provide any sense of its depth, or any additional explanation about why it might be an appropriate thread for GD.
itsrobert
(14,157 posts)Your criticism is noted, however not warranted. Thank you.
Ms. Toad
(34,123 posts)You could have provided some explanation about what it was, or why you were posting it. FWIW, I am not the first person in this thread to react with suspicion.
Good day.
Ms. Toad
(34,123 posts)About half of the two juries reacted the same way I did. (I was not the alerter on either one.)
If you intended people to read the article, because of its content, the way you chose to post it was a massive fail. And your reaction to that suggestion that you should add some explanation only serves to reinforce my suspicions about why it was posted.
BainsBane
(53,112 posts)Add me to the list because it's obvious, as I'm sure it is to everyone else.
Orrex
(63,260 posts)To eliminate confusion or something.
itsrobert
(14,157 posts)thanks for the input.
Also, I looked for key excerpts I could use, but felt they wouldn't do justice to entire article.
Orrex
(63,260 posts)I said you should have posted the entire article in the subject line, poking fun at the fact that you were criticized for your verbatim choice of subject line.
Hardy har har.
itsrobert
(14,157 posts)thanks
Drew Richards
(1,558 posts)AUTOMATED MESSAGE: Results of your Jury ServiceOn Sun Feb 23, 2014, 09:03 PM an alert was sent on the following post:
My boobs, my burden
http://www.democraticunderground.com/10024553544
REASON FOR ALERT
This post is disruptive, hurtful, rude, insensitive, over-the-top, or otherwise inappropriate.
ALERTER'S COMMENTS
Does DU really need another thread linking to a picture of and story about a large breasted woman? Is there really anything here besides another attempt to rile up our members?
Please hid this thread.
You served on a randomly-selected Jury of DU members which reviewed this post. The review was completed at Sun Feb 23, 2014, 09:16 PM, and the Jury voted *1-5 to LEAVE IT*.
Juror #1 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: While I'm not a fan of OPs with little or no exposition, I reviewed the article linked in the OP and it seems to be a legitimate article (the only photo is of an actress, not the author, and it's somewhat revealing but not x-rated). I even looked at the poster's history in GD, and it doesn't appear he or she has been spamming the forum with gender-related posts or OPs. I cannot in good conscience hide this thread without more justification.
Juror #2 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: "No explanation given"
Juror #3 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: Actually while I agree with alerter in general and that the poster not posting a comment seems to be potentially a flame bait...the article posted is very very good and points to the problems that arise from overly large mammaries and how brest reduction can improve a womans life...i vote to leave it because the article is that good...
Juror #4 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: There's nothing wrong with posting an article from Salon. Read it, you might learn something.
Juror #5 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: Totally agree with the alerter, offensive to many and deliberate flamebait
Juror #6 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: "No explanation given"
Thank you very much for participating in our Jury system, and we hope you will be able to participate again in the future.
Vashta Nerada
(3,922 posts)Which they didn't even read.
I'm shocked.
Blue_Adept
(6,402 posts)You know, a real excerpt, a reason for interest or discussion by them for the membership, instead of just what's going to be an eye-catching flamefest title for many.
rrneck
(17,671 posts)TheCowsCameHome
(40,169 posts).
tammywammy
(26,582 posts)Sarah Ibarruri
(21,043 posts)It's physically and emotionally uncomfortable to be too big on top. It always struck me as weird that any woman (except totally flat ones) would want a breast enlargement. I know someone who had a breast enlargement done and she looks bizarre. She looks bizarre not so much because she's now so huge, but because implants look like implants, they don't look like real breasts. You can tell.
TreasonousBastard
(43,049 posts)with the inane comment somewhere in one of those alerts that posting an article about breast reduction is an example of misogyny.
This is a particularly good article about a subject I would assume many women think about while few men understand. It's a shame that it works here to show the depths of absurdity this ridiculous made-up "gender war" has sunk to.
That was the point, no?
If not, perhaps posting the cover of this month's Spanish Cosmo that I saw while waiting on a checkout line today will help.
BainsBane
(53,112 posts)Where have I heard that before?
Funny how the OP can't manage to say a thing about the article he links to. Women on DU have had conversations about these subjects ourselves. Women have talked about getting breast reductions, working with insurance agencies for authorization, while I have offered to share my expertise on bras. It's not the subject matter that is the problem. It is the OP's intent. But the war on women is entirely made up. Now where have I heard that before?
TreasonousBastard
(43,049 posts)keep falling for this stuff. Not that much from me any more, because this gender madness becomes less and less amusing by the day.
Note that several women in this thread sensibly ignored the bait and started discussing the article, most likely throwing the troll off his game and spoiling his fun.
But calling him out? Even if there is such a war going on (which there is actually scant evidence of) a callout just keeps the fires burning and forces a predictable outcome.
But, you know that already, don't you?
Tuesday Afternoon
(56,912 posts)the phrase in and of itself is admission that bait was indeed posted. Thank you and Have a good day.
BainsBane
(53,112 posts)snooper2
(30,151 posts)I don't know how many stores we went to and still couldn't find a bra that fit and didn't hurt--
She ended up order one online for like $50 that finally works good for her. Now we need to get four more-
Ridiculous, not everyone is a B cup
BainsBane
(53,112 posts)It hasn't been updated recently, but it still has a lot of good information. http://www.plussizebras.info/
KitSileya
(4,035 posts)Go to the reddit abrathatfits and for most women, their lives will be changed. I went from wearing 40DDDs (also known as 40Es) to 34Hs when I got measured *properly*.
It's another way women get hosed by clothes manufacturers - even though the average cup size should be around a G, but making cups above D+ costs more. Cup volume is reduced when you go down a band size, so a 34B has the same cup volume as a 32C and a 30D, but instead most bra sellers go up in band size, because they want to sell you bras, and their cup sizes are rarely above a DDD - lower in Victoria's Secret, I've heard (and isn't that ironic.) The band should provide 80-90% of the support, so when you're wearing bras that are 2-3+ inches too large around the band, you get problems with your back, shoulders etc.
And I totally get the problems of the woman in the OP article. In my twenties, I got so fed up and uncomfortable with men never looking me in the face and harassing me on the streets, I put on 40lbs. So much better for my mental health - I practically became invisible. Sweet, sweet relief!
VanillaRhapsody
(21,115 posts)that seems a tad suspicious to me.......especially without adding any context....I'd say this was more flamebait...
Coyotl
(15,262 posts)HappyMe
(20,277 posts)last summer. She's amazed at how much better she feels.
PasadenaTrudy
(3,998 posts)no fun. They really started growing in menopause...
myrna minx
(22,772 posts)decision she's made. She's a very petite woman and had 9 lbs removed. She no longer has crippling neck and back trouble and can purchase bras off the rack instead of special ordering them at a huge expense. She can now find clothes to fit her too. The surgery truly liberated her. Thanks for posting.
HappyMe
(20,277 posts)stomach and such feels less crunched up - probably because of the way she sat or walked or something.
myrna minx
(22,772 posts)sciatic nerve. She learned to overcompensate for the weight in the front. She's so much happer now.
HappyMe
(20,277 posts)She even looks less stressed because the pain is gone.
tammywammy
(26,582 posts)She's currently pregnant and supposed to give birth in a few weeks. I know she wants to breastfeed (but we're not that close so I don't know how long, etc.). Anywho, she's thinking of trying to get a reduction by the end of the year since she's already met her insurance deductible this year. I've never really talked to her about her issues with them, and though I have ample breasts they're not a hindrance or pain inducing. That's why I liked this article, I'd never really thought about how difficult it is for the larger breasted among us.
myrna minx
(22,772 posts)It was so painful for her. It cost her a toll on her back, neck as well as the pocket - special order bras a very expensive!
All of my best to your acquaintance. I'm sure if she makes the decision to do it, it may free her from a lot of pain and discomfort.
Cobalt Violet
(9,905 posts)Wish I had the opportunity to do it 15 years ago but glad the nightmare is over now. I look forward to my new and very much improved life. I can't wait to wear all those styles of clothes I just never could before. I can't wait to swim in public! I'm already living in a lot less back, neck, shoulder pain and probably extended my career another 10-15 years. There isn't a down side to it for me. Worth every penny spent.