Bush Says He Will Harm Nation Differently from His Brother
CHICAGO (The Borowitz Report) In an effort to distance himself from the legacy of his brother, George W. Bush, former Florida Governor Jeb Bush will use a major foreign-policy speech on Wednesday to assert that, if elected President, he would harm the nation in completely different ways. A lot of people are looking at me and thinking that Im just going to be a rerun of my brother, Bush told reporters before the speech. They are greatly underestimating my ability to create chaos and destruction in ways that are uniquely mine.
As an example, Bush said, he was unlikely to invade Iraq for a third time, calling such an action too derivative.
George already did it, and Dad did it before him, he said. Call it my independent streak, if you will, but I want to spawn some disasters of my own.
http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/bush-says-will-harm-nation-differently-brother