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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsSupreme Court Forces G.O.P. to Seek New Bogus Issues for 2016 revealed by Andy Borowitz
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)With its landmark decisions this week, the United States Supreme Court has sent the Republican Party scrambling to find entirely new bogus issues to pound away at during the 2016 campaign.
With gay marriage and Obamacare effectively taken off the table, the Republicans now find themselves without a signature phony issue to disingenuously flog for the next sixteen months.
But according to the Republican National Committee chairman, Reince Priebus, the Party is already conducting an exhaustive search to find fresh new spurious positions to shamelessly distract voters during the upcoming campaign.
Twenty-foot border fence, national voter I.D. cards, abolition of the I.R.S., mandatory transvaginal ultrasounds, Priebus said. Back at R.N.C. headquarters, weve got a wall of three-by-five cards filled with crap like that.
Priebus acknowledged that the loss of Obamacare and gay marriage as issues had dealt a serious blow to the G.O.P.s supply of meaningless talking points, but he claimed that the Party would come back with even more insincere rhetoric than before. Anyone who thinks weve run out of b.s. is sorely mistaken, he said.
www.borowitzreport.com
shenmue
(38,506 posts)I'm sure that is a Crisis Waiting to Happen.
Wellstone ruled
(34,661 posts)That's the ticket!!!!!!! Rinse Penus needs to get a grip,after all his home state is falling apart at the seams.
Laura PourMeADrink
(42,770 posts)Twenty-foot border fence, national voter I.D. cards, abolition of the I.R.S., mandatory transvaginal ultrasounds,
These are clown car topics. None will get them any more voters except the crazy ones they have now.
I know Trump is talking fence. Said something like No one can get something built like I can
spooky3
(34,543 posts)But they already have their new issue.
Ted Cruz calls for judicial retention elections for Supreme Court justices
AnnetteJacobs
(142 posts)and gas prices spiking. And Obama taking the blame.
I'm hardly a psychic...it's like clockwork.
underpants
(183,071 posts)Because the media will ignore that the GOP has had a 40 year campaign against both issues.
Gothmog
(146,035 posts)Egnever
(21,506 posts)Elect Republicans so we can overturn these activist court decisions blah blah.
TrollBuster9090
(5,955 posts)and then have him tie a rope around his waist, drop his pants, and then hoist himself up the flagpole at the South Carolina confederate memorial? That sounded like a good plan to me, what was Priebus's problem with it?
Thespian2
(2,741 posts)or have others noticed that "Reince" sounds like the cure for a bad hair day?
ProgressiveEconomist
(5,818 posts)are new 'dogwhistles' being tested at the state level. See http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1014&pid=1128548 for a Washington Post link