"Gratitude". Adult language, a little crude, just a little....but honest.
Last edited Wed Feb 13, 2019, 07:36 PM - Edit history (1)
Am I grateful for today?.
.I hear that one all the time.
Most of the time, the answer is NO !!!
I AM ANGRY ABOUT THIS OR THAT..
TRUMP, or the news, or the winter, or stupid Republicans...
In between the anger, I had to get up from this place and go to the bathroom
I needed to pee. (Yes, that happens to all of us)...
and then, I stopped to think about that.
There was a time, when I had prostate problems..
And that thing that men have, didn't work.
So, I had surgery and they fixed that.
So I was walking fast to get to the bathroom,
And after my effort there...then..
I stopped for a moment to think about that..
I had 2 hip surgeries, cause my hips didn't work too well.
And they fixed those hips. (so I could walk fast to the bathroom, I guess)
I was also little winded cause I had walked up the stairs in order to get
back to the computer after messing around in the kitchen.
(Yes, those are the same stairs I talked about before )
But this time...after walking up those stairs...and was winded, and
I stopped to think about that.
Yes, I was "winded"...I was breathing hard.
But that pump in my chest was working pretty well, and
I recovered rather quickly.
Yes...I had a surgery to fix that pump cause it wasn't working very well..
And they repaired that pump, and it works pretty well now..
Yes, there is even more,
But that is enough for today.
As I write these words,
I need to stop and think about all of this.
Do I have some gratitude for all of this?
That I can get up those stairs, and take a pee,
That the pump in my chest is still working, and the prostate works.
and that I see the computer.
And all the rest. My mind still works. My fingers work to type these words?
And, .I did recover from all of that, and much more..
So..Where is the gratitude?.
Sometimes it gets lost, in a closet, and I forget about it.
Because I am in too much in a rush..to do this or that.
Or, I am too mad because of this or that.
Or, something else isn't working..this or that.
But where is the gratitude..?? Ops, I just found it, and even though it is very cold outside,
and I am angry about this or that, and feel sorry about mistakes I made.
Or I feel very sad about some losses that I have had.
.....The gratitude is still there.......................
It was lost in a closet, or in a pile of old books that need to be tossed,
but it is still there....
What I need to do is think about it, and for a while it is back.
Then I am grateful for this day, and this moment..because that is what is important..
It is not about tomorrow or yesterday, It is about what I have right now..
And that is what I have, today. Then I am thankful just for today...
Ops, I got to get up and go to the bathroom again
If you got this far, thank you for reading this..........
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..........IF IT WERE EASY, IT WOULD BE EASY.....
Those of us who have issues on living in the present, and having gratitude, and focusing on the "NOW"
often, we think this is an easy way to live. Well it isn't.....
...For lots of reasons we don't have the ..."Gratitude Show"...We have other movies playing in our brains, and we would like to easily, change the channel or remove the disk and put in another..
Yes, there are writers who say it is easy, and they sell lots of books, but ..............................................
...................................................................................................................................................
......IT AIN'T EASY.....IF IT WERE EASY, IT WOULD BE EASY !!!!!!!..............................
..i have struggled with saying in the now, for a whole lot of years. I worry and then I worry some more. You name it, I can worry about it. ............but.......I am trying too. And focus on what I don't like and being angry too. But we do our best, and try the best we can. That's it. and That is enouigh....I don't have enough "Gratitude" on some days...Often, and I look out the window, and try to figure out if the...Gratitude Police will be coming by my house to give me 44 tickets for not having gratitude enough...
...Of course, there are no gratitude police, and we are the chief of our own police, and it is very hard when we learned the wrong way to deal with it. But again, we must do the best we can..one daly at a time..for our own good. Yes, it is true, there are many others who are better at it, that is ok, I am not them, I am me....
...Today, i will do the best that I can do, and be kind to me. I try to be kind to others, but I should use that energy to be kind to Stuart. He is a nice fellow, and tries to help others. Hope you are having a good day Tiger, and we need to appreciate who we are. We are not perfect, and if it were easy, it would be easy.
Thank You for reading this....
