that will make your life suck, too. you carry the anxiety home too, then back to work...ugh. that cycle sucks

But I never ended up taking a job in the field. I think this sort of anxiety is part of the reason why. I am back in my old line of work, and while going back to school was a worthwhile experience, I don't think I am cut out to work in an emergency or critical care environment.

the best stress reliever is an hour of cardio and a half hour of weight lifting when I get home, no matter how busy or rotten the day has been...

And that actually happened to me during my clinical practicum. I was training to be a respiratory therapist. Passed the program with good grades, passed the certification and registry exams. Interviewed at a few hospitals, but never got hired. Looking back, I think it probably was not a good fit. I went back to work in my old field (tech support) for a small software company that respects its employees.

My shift boss was one of those people who would get it in for someone and then take all of his personal misery out on them every chance he could.

Since being a blackjack dealer is one of those jobs where you're already "the enemy" in the minds of at least some of the patrons, it's common for belligerent customers to complain to floor people or shift bosses (whoever is close by and wearing a suit regardless of their actual rank in management) about anything and everything.

I had my job threatened when a player at a slam-up busy roulette game kept insisting on placing bets several seconds after I had waved my hand across the layout and loudly stated "no more bets" as the ball was about to drop into the wheel. After enough times doing this I finally took the player's chip off the layout and gave it a gentle 6-inch toss back to him while having my head turned towards the wheel so that I could mark the winning number. The player, instead of having his playing chips in somewhat neat stacks like most people do, just had a sloppy pile of chips in front of him, many of which were barely hanging on the edge of the table. So of course, the chip that I once again gently tossed back to him managed to hit his sloppy mound and sent one of those chips to the floor. The punk-ass motherfucker threw a FIT over that, went to said shift boss, and when my hour was up at that game I spent half my break having my job threatened and just generally being told what a piece of shit I was to this guy. And there were many other instances like that.

The final straw was when a big bettor sat at my blackjack table and I proceeded to whoop his ass. All I was turning was bust cards for him, and blackjacks, 21s and 20s for me. I apologized more than once for the horrible luck and kept dealing, but rather than sitting at another of the empty or nearly empty tables the dude just kept sitting there and saying over and over that "I hated (him)." Seriously, WTF? I "hate" the guy because the cards are terrible? And the worst part was I knew this customer was a good tipper and I felt horrible about taking his money! Mr. shift boss was standing at a podium not 5 feet away, noticed what was happening, and decided that even though I had apologized and commiserated with the customer on the thousand-dollar-plus beating he took from me in a matter of minutes, I had still somehow managed to be rude and surly to the guy. I knew what was coming, and by the time my replacement dealer came in and "tapped me out" for my break I was almost in tears.

Bullshit.

So a couple of days later, I was given a three-day suspension effective during a string of days which was convenient for him. I figured that after the suspension my job was probably finished. I was wrong. Instead, just a couple of weeks after coming back from the suspension, I found out that Mr. Shift Boss From Hell was leaving the casino and going out to Tennessee with his wife.

Would you believe that I survived at that job for another four years without anything more than a couple of minor verbal warnings after he was gone? Would you believe that the full-blown panic attacks I was beginning to experience at the sight of the employee entrance or even sometimes in the fucking car trying to drive to the place subsided completely? Well, they did.

And the only thing which got me through the worst of my time with that jackoff was a prescription for Xanax. It calmed my emotions down just enough to function while I waited for the next incident which would get me in some sort of manufactured trouble. I haven't had to take any Xanax since then, and this was back in 2002, but at least I know it is there and it helped me.

I don't know if your personal job issues are due to your own mindset or if it's something imposed upon you by a horrible boss like my own issues were, but despite the problems some people have had with them, I would suggest an anti-anxiety medication as a last resort. Other than that, just keep trying to do your best and keep your life focus on the fun things you can do when you're not at the job. I know a lot of time is spent at work and so it's easy to get caught up in it, but make the other things -- even the little ones -- your central focus. It does help at least a little bit.

Sorry this post ended up being so long. I hope it helped though.

Time, really is the only way to get pass this.

books' would be coming and to set it up. She said it in french but the 'poket books' part was in english. I thought I understood. Sure enough pocket size books came and I put them on display. A few days later another display of pocket sized books came with books we were already selling. So I didn't put it up. My boss boss had told me that she only wanted one extra display of books in the store at a time. Turns out "poket books" was the publisher of the second set of books that arrived for display. Big mistake on my part. A language mistake. I felt terrible. Couldn't explain it. But life was dealing me much greater problems at the time so I let it pass. Nothing like trauma to fix in your heart and mind what is important and what is not worth fretting over.

Once I called in sick for a few days after I made a work mistake because I had so much anxiety - and I lost the job. Looking back, I should have just gone to work and faced the consequences. It was an honest mistake. I think managers want you to be upset, but not devastated. They make mistakes too.

I have to compare it to what happens to other people on the worst day at their jobs... I used to work for a surgeon. On a bad day someone died on the operating table and he had to tell the family. Then he had to go to work the next day and do the same operation on somebody else all over again. I figure even if you're bright enough to be a surgeon, that's the part of the job that is really the hard part.

So I ask myself- whats a really bad day like on this job... I screw up somebody's computer? I can handle that. Those things can be fixed. The surgeon I worked for put things in perspective too- they would have died anyway, and so on. It just was a much bigger perspective. I think he used alcohol too.

I deal with property values and property tax issues. Mistakes happen. It is a reality, and it is just something that you fix and move on. It isn't neurosurgery where there are no second chances, and I TELL people that on the very first day.

What I am seeing in this thread is not so much about performance anxiety as it is workplace abuse and harassment. Seems like the highest levels of anxiety come when everybody is dealing with a yahoo boss. Yes, there ARE jobs that are high stress, but it seems to me that there are an awful lot of workplaces that are just a mess. I totally get that there are some jobs with *NO* room for error. I admire the heck outta anybody that can do that every day. Those jobs sure wouldn't be my career of choice, however.



Laura

Some people will have anxiety in any workplace situation. In that case, professional treatment for anxiety would be a good idea. In the other cases, treatment for anxiety could also be a good idea. Another idea would be to quit as soon as possible. Not everyone is suited for every type of career and if making life and death decisions every day makes you nervous, you should not do it. If it is your workplace, some workplaces are very toxic for many people and you are under no obligation to endure it. I know that it can be difficult to find another position, but the longer you feel anxiety about your work situation, the less confidence you will have when interviewing for other positions.

It gets used a lot. It's labelled the "quiet room" but everybody knows. I also use the sick room waiting for migraines to go away