My split-personality kitchen knife
On hitting a tomato:
"I know you're joking, bro. Look at that skin! Look at the size of those seeds! Hell, part of the stalk is still on. You cannot actually expect me to slice this tomato, bro."
On hitting my thumb:
"I am Tsumugari no Tachi, the Blade of Destiny. I have many names, some of which you are unworthy to hear: I am called grass-cutter, he who harvests the unready; I am called sword-of-heaven, he who sends evildoers to their fate; I am called April-snow, come and gone as fast as a spring frost; these are enough, and now you shall feel my bite! PATH THROUGH OBLIVION!"
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When chopping an onion, my knife would rather chop my finger instead of the onion? Or, my knife prefers to cut my finger rather than cut the onion. It prefers fingers to onions.
Only the knife knows!
you are much more likely to get cut by a dull knife than a sharp one (or so I read somewhere, I seem perfectly able to cut myself with both kinds 
)
It's tiny. About an inch and a half long. The jpg is just a smidge larger than life size.
It also had a toothpick and tweezers.
Handy as a pocket on a shirt.
Never leave home without it.
Hard to get a really sharp edge on the blade, though.
I was trying to slice some large dog treats (kinda like Milk Bones) for some smaller dogs, and slipped and put a nice gash in my finger.
Turn it upside down. Holding your knife almost completely flat, run the blade, bottom-to-top, against the un-glazed part of the dish.
