You will get through it.

Play some music you enjoy.

I hope I will.

Feels like I’m going to be crying forever, to be honest. I’m trying to tell myself that’s ridiculous, and I will eventually feel better, and nothing is really the matter.

I have everything I need in life to feel happy, and I’m just feeling sad for stupid reasons, that’s all.

Actually, any number of jazz youtube videos. Also, meditation, and healing sound ones.

I will listen to some jazz today as I paint.

Thank you for being so kind, and for helping me.

If I can ever be there for you, please don’t hesitate to reach out. I will do my best to be there for you. 🤗🤗🤗❤️❤️❤️

and caring in this wondetful community. Be soothed, be comforted, be well.

And we are looking forward to seeing some of your art, if you feel like sharing.

My goto music when really depressed and anxious. Nothing like head banging - (not literally lol.)

Softer stuff, Dan Fogelberg has the ability to take you down and then all the way up to the sky with his music.

Anything by Bob Marley.

Just my opinions, and hope you find the right music to get your grove on to and feel better.

We got your back.

Thank you for letting me know I’m not alone in occasionally struggling with these feelings, as well.

These are great suggestions, and Bob Marley music especially always lifts my spirits!

Thank you for having my back. if I can ever be there for you, I hope you will do me the honor of asking for my help. I will do my best to have your back.

Last edited Mon Jan 9, 2023, 04:54 AM - Edit history (1)

Little Movies with people dancing who aren't necessarily the best dancers in the world but they look happy.

Justin Timberlake CAN'T STOP THIS FEELING

I shall watch them and feel better! It was so kind of you to find and post these, and I am touched and grateful you would spend your time and energy helping some random weirdo here on DU like me.

🥰

Your post, and all these posts, just go to show what a wonderful community DU is and what kind and thoughtful people who populate this site.

All of you are truly a light shining in this dark world and you all give me hope.

It reminds me that reaching out works.

It reminds me to watch my helpful videos.

And putting a little sunshine in someone else's dark stormy day is the best feeling EVER.

Yeah, DU is a cool place.

One of the things I like about myself (struggling to remind myself of my good qualities tonight) is that once I give my word on something, I won’t break it.

I promised someone recently I would never hurt him, for instance, and I won’t. No matter what he does to me.

I think it was brave and wise of me to come here tonight to ask for a hug. I needed one. That’s another thing I am proud of…that I reached out for help when I needed it, in a safe space.

And my DH told me today he is proud of how good at art I have become. I feel good about that side of me, too.

Just trying to remind myself, I’m not worthless, I’m not garbage, and I am worthy of taking up space in the world.

✌️❤️🌹🤗

I will take your words and try to remember I have value just like any other person on earth.

Thank you. ❤️✌️🌹

What kind of art do you make?

You have to humble down, to ask for help, because you are admitting you aren’t strong enough to cope at the moment.

These posts and a good night’s sleep and some music have me feeling much much better now.

I don’t know what the future will bring. I hope I will be okay and not fall back into the hole. Just taking it one second at a time.

Glad to be feeling somewhat better this morning.

Thank you.

❤️✌️🌹

Yaleis offering their very popular Science of Well-Being free:

https://www.coursera.org/learn/the-science-of-well-being?utm_source=gg&utm_medium=sem&utm_campaign=09-ScienceofWellBeing-US&utm_content=B2C&campaignid=9728548210&adgroupid=119657127259&device=m&keyword=&matchtype=&network=g&devicemodel=&adpostion=&creativeid=506816645212&hide_mobile_promo&gclid=CjwKCAiAk--dBhABEiwAchIwkfeQmXoj-YCRAVnJ7K_kk4bfm_b-oCBOAnbnSK6M-2PRBa58H4ytSxoCMCEQAvD_BwE

Enjoy!

Others loved it!

Just 3 short entries, numbered, each night right before bed. Then reread entire list.

Can be anything: sunshine, water, stars, new shoelaces...

Really jump starts positive energy flow. 😉

What kind of art do you make?

I am not a technical artist by any means.

There I sat with some of the finest artists from all over the world, literally pinching yself under the table wondering "Am I really here doing this?"

I was the only non-artist in the classes who was not an exceptional artist.

One of my teachers told me I had a great advantage because the other studets had to get past all their technical art training. And I saw this as our lengthy studio classes progressed. 😉

Pat B. Allen, an instructor from that school, wrote a great book about the process used in their MA of Art Therapy program: "Art is a Way of Knowing."

From $1.68 used on Amazon:

https://www.amazon.com/Art-Way-Knowing-Self-Knowledge-Fulfillment/dp/1570620784

You might also enjoy reading Dr. James Pennebaker's research on journaling therapy:

https://liberalarts.utexas.edu/psychology/faculty/pennebak

Enjoy!

You’re not alone. I’m grateful you came here to share. It tells me I’m not alone, too. Hugs to you. I hope you’re feeling better soon.

Sometimes a kind word from a kind person gives the strength you need to keep on breathing for another day.

I think I will feel better soon. I just have to hang on and not do anything stupid, and keep breathing.

I thought it might be a good idea to seek some support here tonight to just help me stay on the right path and get to the other side where I’m hoping I won’t feel so bad anymore.

Thank you.

I hope I can return the favor to you. You can contact me anytime, I will try to be there if you need me.

🤗❤️

I had a "friend" for 20 years, we raised our kids together and saw eachother all the time, played cards and shared dinner as the kids grew up and moved out.

Then I had another friend from across the country come and move in with me. She turned on me and said this person would "take me for all I had" and that they had to "protect themselves" I ended it right then and there.

My new roommate has been with me a year and we are the best friends and platonic nesting partners I know. Too bad that other friend was too worried about money or whatever to be happy for me having someone who could live with me and be there where she couldn't.

C'est La Vie! You are valuable as a person and people who turn on you or show their true colors are at least showing you so you can distance yourself from the damage. It hurts, but you realize after the fact that YOU matter most. :hugs:

I hope this helped a little...

I am so sorry you went through a bad situation like that, but glad you survived and are in happy circumstances, and you were able to see that you didn’t deserve it, and have value and worth.

That’s kind of what I am struggling with. Reminding myself I am a good person and have value and worth, and didn’t deserve poor treatment.

That’s how life is, I know, sometimes we get mistreated. Because of a history of abuse, I tend to blame myself when I encounter cruelty, and that’s a hard thing to struggle with, that feeling that I am worthless and deserve abuse. I’m trying to remind myself, that’s the CPTSD talking, and not reality.

In reality, I am someone who has tried to be kind to others, and have tried in my own small ways to make the world a better place…am still trying to do so.

Thank you for replying, thank you for being here.

I don’t feel so alone anymore. It really helps so much, just knowing that.

so I know that feeling of thinking it's your fault.

I realized after this person and I parted ways that she mistreated me constantly and I took it. Because somehow I thought she was "better" than me or whatever... She always used to make fun of my writing and creative ventures cuz it wasn't "real"...she used to always citisize my parenting through ALL the years we parented together... etcetc

So it might help to look at it as a way to release something toxic in your life so that better connections can be made. Happy new year, right?

It is clear to me you are a gentle and caring soul, and you didn’t deserve any of that abuse.

I’ve read those of us with a history, tend to not recognize abuse when other people would. We were raised to accept abuse, basically, and not defend ourselves, and give love in return for abuse.

I think that may be what happened to you. It wasn’t your fault.

And it wasn’t my fault for not seeing things more clearly, sooner. On top of the history, I struggle with brain damage from MS, and that makes everything so much harder.

I need to forgive myself for not seeing the abuse sooner. For not understanding what was happening. I still don’t understand. But that doesn’t matter. What matters is I have walked away from the abuse and am seeking safety and healing now.

I like that idea of letting go of toxic stuff to allow good stuff into my life. I hope the good stuff, like friendship, arrives soon because I’m so lonely at the moment. I wish I had a friend, for real.

But you"re not alone.

Btw, generally speaking from experience, most humans suck. Lol

Get a dog or kitty for companionship.

And he has been my best friend for twelve years now. He got me through a bad spell of Transverse Myelitis/Multiple Sclerosis where I was in the Neuro ICU a couple weeks and ended up with permanent disabilities. He got me through an emergency hysterectomy/oopherectomy.

You know what? He was such a good kitty, he never jumped up on my lap once in the months after my hysterectomy. He seemed to know I was hurting. Isn’t that something?

I bet your Shelties are amazing like that! I’d love to hear about your fur babies if you feel like talking about them!

❤️❤️❤️

I'm so glad you have each other

I don't currently have a Sheltie, but I adore the breed.

I currently have a senior rescue kitty, a pittie Mother Nature sent my way, & a feral kitty who has opted to live indoors.

None of my animals like each other & the feral is FIV positive, so he lives in my conputer room. Such a sweet little guy. He just wants to be petted constantly. It took him 4 years to allow me to pet him & now he can't get enough. Lol

Healing vibes on the way to you. 💓💓💓

Giving them a home even with the health problems. You have a very good heart!

I’m very glad to know you, even if it’s just here on DU.

Please give your kitties some scritches from me and tell them Mr. Bobo says he would share some of his catnip and treats with them if he could!

Accepting the healing vibes with a whole bunch of gratitude….thank you….

Tonight when I wait for sleep, I won’t cry, I will think instead, someone nice cared about me enough to send me healing vibes, and the world still has good people in it, people who provide loving homes for kitties who really really need a loving home and don’t have anyplace else to go.

🤗❤️🌹✌️😻😻😻😻😻😻😻

So glad to know my words helped you to feel better some.

It's just not in me to ignore another of Mother Nature's kids in need. I can't even imagine.

Mr. Bobo is very kind to offer to share toys & treats.

My senior will not play with anything.

Feral kitty played with cat dancer today for a bit. Yea!!! His first time engaging with a toy.

Sleep well, my friend.

You are such a good person ❤️🌹

And wow that’s great news about your feral kitty trusting you enough to play! 😻😻😻😻

I am feeling better now, thanks to your kindness and the kindness of others here, and I will try to get on with life now.

never mean like people can be. Pets will help you and ask for very little.

Right beside me now, purring away, just happy to be next to me. He is my best friend.

He doesn’t want to share me with any other fur babies though. He told me so.

And I feel like I’m garbage because I got treated like garbage, and…I’m hurting and I could use a hug because this crying thing is getting pretty old.

That’s all.

That’s all the venting I need to do.

Know you are in my thoughts tonight and a big hug from Palm Springs💕

About health etc, and it’s just been feeling like a little too much tonight. So I thought it might be a good thing for me to reach out for some support instead of doing anything self-destructive.

Thank you for giving me that vote of confidence that I’m going to be okay and I will make it to solid ground soon.

Thank you

❤️❤️❤️🤗🤗🤗🌹🌹🌹

💕❤️💕❤️💕😘

you need.

I hope life is being good to you and I hope this will be your best year ever.

❤️❤️❤️🌹🌹🌹🤗🤗🤗

for you. The year is starting in a very interesting way. Take heart, keep up with your art. . .Will you share that with us?

And, although I know this is hard, perhaps look on the situation as clearing out some dead weight. Sometimes we don't see how toxic some of the people in our lives are until they are gone, however painful the going can be.

Just remember we are all here for you.

You are a very good person, and you deserve good things in life!

I think you have given me very wise advice here, food for thought.

No more allowing people in my life who only want to harm me. Including my family of origin. I have gone no contact with them for many many years before, and came back only out of guilt.

I think it is time for me to put my own needs first and go no contact again.

Clear out the dead weight, and I don’t know what comes next in my life, but even if I am alone, I will still be happier to simply be free from further abuse.

Similar story with a close friend a few years ago. He fell into the Trump abyss and made it his mission to destroy all of his friendships. The lies he told about me cut to the quick. Then I eventually figured out he was actually talking about himself and projecting his own character on me.

Yes. Sometimes we don’t realize people are toxic until they have done great harm to us, and then we have to try to patch ourselves up as best we can and move forward on our path, without them.

I am sorry you were hurt too, and I hope you have found healing and happiness now.

Thank you.

I felt free. Like others have said, I can tell from your comments you are going to get through this just fine in the end. You sound like a very strong person.

Posted a similar thing last week and was given so much love here I feel like I need to give some back.

Stay strong and take care of yourself!

This will pass and you will be stronger for it!

I hope you are. I’m here if you need an ear!

I hope this will pass and I hope I will come through to the other side soon.

I am feeling better already this morning, which gives me hope.

It’s a beautiful day here and I’m making progress on a remodel of our bathroom, so feeling somewhat accomplished.

It comes and goes, tomorrow is my birthday so hopefully it will be a good day as well.

blessings and love.

In CA it has been raining and raining, and in the foothills, gale force wind as well.
I had to make some fixes and patches when the wind subsided. ARGGGHHHH.

Been reorganizing the home, so we share the "This home needs work" frame of mind.

Best wishes!

🤗❤️🌹

and have found with advice from my medical professionals help with a med I hadn't tried yet. I am at more peace than I have had in 25 years. Good luck and good vibes cuz I know it ain't easy

And thank you for letting me know I am not alone.

I wouldn’t wish these feelings I have been struggling with on my worst enemy in the world, on the worst person who has ever lived.

If I can ever be of service, please don’t hesitate to reach out to me.

I will

Everyone can resolve it and find happiness.

You are so wise, about feeling gratitude for what we have. 🙏

And I do, every single day.

I hope for a benevolent outcome, but recent signs point to something else, and I am scared and finding it hard to hang on to hope.

All I can do is keep walking my path as best I can and take the comfort I have received here and patch myself up with it, stop the bleeding some.

I had something similar happen in '99 - a while ago, I know; but still fresh on my mind.

There was a bank co-worker who'd give me rides home, and we became close.

He was a Republican, and we'd argue over the Clinton impeachment and such - but we clicked, you know?

Before long, I found a position for the same bank but close enough to home to allow me to bike to and from work on my time. That seemed to be the end of our friendship too.

A month later, there was a robbery at my branch - and, little did I realize, I quickly became the 'person of interest' (about the only time anyone's shown interest in yours truly, truth be told).

A few days later, my friend shows up at home - unexpectedly. Though within minutes, he seemed anxious to leave ("did I say something wrong?" I thought).

Sure enough, I later found out he had a wire under his shirt. 'Painful' barely describes the feeling.

Well - fast-forward a year, and I tried restarting our friendship. I missed his company and witty sense of humor.

He was none too pleased to see me; I told him I had just been fired - he almost laughed (!). I tried again after a few weeks - but he was just as sore, if not more so. We never spoke again.

Years later, I found out he had been arrested on a minor pot charge in the interim - and was convinced I was behind it (fortunately, he was acquitted).

If only he had told me! But by the time I learned of it so much time had passed, I couldn't bring myself to call (plus, I no longer know where he lives or his number).

The moral of the story? I still don't really know. Except perhaps that I know what you mean.

And that so much in life, is misunderstanding.

Someday - I like to think - we all meet in the afterlife, and all these muddles can be explained.

In the meantime, I've found deep breaths and St. John's Wort to be great help. Here's to happier days, and All the Best!

That would leave scars on anyone!

And yeah, it’s hard when you don’t understand how or why things happen, especially when you get hurt in the process.

Maybe it’s best for me to just breathe deeply and find what comfort I can in my little world.

❤️🤗🌹

Small potatoes compared to some of the other problems I've had - but painful nonetheless.

I like to think we come back, you know?

And if so, some of these Republican bigwigs who enjoy throwing their weight around - they won't like what comes next, I promise them that.

Thanks again, and All the Best.

Hang in there my friend, hang in there.

❤️🤗🌹

I was thinking just now I felt ok. And realized how my moods go up and down, kind of a flow and if I just watch them from the outside without worrying I realize they change over and over.

I once again wanted to go no sugar and only made it 5 days. But rather than beat myself up I decided to love myself and just try for as many healthy days as I can.

Sending hugs your way

Sugar is as addictive as anything else, I think.

Yes, my moods are changeable too. Maybe it’s that way for everyone.

Today I’m feeling a bit better, and I’m grateful for that.

Going to try for a healthy day today for myself, too.

Most of my moods come from reacting to my husband's stuff. I tell myself its his stuff but hard not to get affected. He deals with depression and has a low frustration level at little things that happen in a normal day, could be anything computer, drop something, etc.

Anxiety and depression are very real. You might find that this time around it is mercifully brief, or you might get mired down in it. Neither is your fault. If you don't have a therapist, I recommend finding one. Your primary care doctor should be able to point you in the right direction. Lead times can be long for getting in, so don't hesitate. In the meantime, consider talking to your doctor about an Rx for Xanax or an equivalent benzo to help quell the anxiety. Low doses just take the edge off to help you function and/or sleep. A short course of a week or two will be enough to tell if it is helping or not. Antidepressants are a lot more difficult in terms of finding the right one at the right dosage, so you are probably better off just focusing on the anxiety first. Note that everyone is different, so take all advice (including mine!) with a grain of salt.

Feel free to DM me for anything. Note that I'm not a doctor, just someone with a very long track record of anxiety and depression. I'm able to be functional and somewhat happy through antidepressants and therapy, with a very occasional Xanax sometimes.

What I'll leave you with is this thought: Calling your doctor and going in to see them to discuss your situation is a HUGELY positive step in the right direction. Just doing that will help you feel like you are in control, and not at the mercy of things.

I will take it under serious consideration!

Wishing you all the best, and again, thank you for reaching out to me and caring.

I am very grateful! What a good person you are!

As I said the first time, don't hesitate to DM me for anything. I'm on at least once a day.

You are surrounded by love. I hope you are breathing easier soon.

There still seems to be some ongoing harm that is worrying me, but all I can do is hope it ends soon.

Thank you.

Here’s to the hope of breathing easy and being free, some day.

Is cry them out and ask for a hug from kind people and find your way to solid ground again so you can move forward on your path.

Thank you for the hug. Hugs to you, too!

I am feeling better today. I think I will be okay now.

I know the feeling all too well.

Peace to you.

If I can ever give you hugs back, please let me do so!

🤗🤗🤗🤗

Of posting this.

I appreciate it very much. ❤️✌️🌹

To just wait and see what happens, to learn the answer to that.

I swear if there seems to be one thing that I can say I am definitely not good at is judging who understands what the word 'friend' means. Because I must look like a pin cushion from all the knives in my back. I feel you LL. All I can say is that you are the better person and most certainly not worthless or useless. You are a decent person. Not many can say this nowadays.

Some RECOVERY INTERNATIONAL Spots

Sample Recovery International Tools

Treat mental health as a business and not as a game.
Humor is our best friend, temper is our worst enemy.
If you can’t change a situation, you can change your attitude towards it.
Be self-led, not symptom-led.
Nervous symptoms and sensations are distressing but not dangerous.
Temper is, among other things, blindness to the other side of the story.
Comfort is a want, not a need.
There is no right or wrong in the trivialities of every day life.
Calm begets calm, temper begets temper.
Don’t take our own dear selves too seriously.
Feelings should be expressed and temper suppressed.
Helplessness is not hopelessness.
Some people have a passion for self-distrust.
Temper maintains and intensifies symptoms.
Do things in part acts.
Endorse yourself for the effort, not only for the performance.
Have the courage to make a mistake.
Feelings are not facts.
Do the things you fear and hate to do.
Fear is a belief—beliefs can be changed.
Every act of self-control leads to a sense of self-respect.


ABOUT RECOVERY

The mission of Recovery International is to use the cognitive-behavioral, peer-to-peer, self-help training system developed by Abraham Low, MD, to help individuals gain skills to lead more peaceful and productive lives.

When things get bad

ETA I have extreme anxiety

People.

Another liberal living alone.
Yes friends flake. Don't internalize that. It happens to us all, lots.

A lot of people recommended music.
That is my lifeblood. Enjoy what you like best.
While I personally love classical music, and play piano (thanks ro my parents for that!), which is an immersive experience and damn good therapy for my moods, guess why the blues were invented?

Everybody gets the blues now and then.
I find that some classical pieces, with their jazz roots, and dissonances, express our inner feelings. For example, Gershwin's Rhapsody in Blue and Concerto in F, or Sibelius' violin concerto.

And take Tchaikovsky's 5th and 6th symphonies. He was an agonized person, and those symphonies will resonate with your inner feelings. By hearing them (or even playing a piano version) instead of taking in or holding all that confict, you can say "There: Tchaikovsky expressed it perfectly, and I can leave my conflict in that music, and let it go!.

Thank you so much, I will look up and play those pieces today! I am feeling so much better now, but I will play them just the same.

I love the blues.

How cool that you play the piano! I love piano music. So much of the music I love a great deal is kind of piano-centric. Kate Bush, Elton John, etc.

Some of the blues I was feeling were wrapped in other emotions like anger and shame, and I had to let those feelings go too, to let go of some of the blues.

During these extraordinary times, we have to give ourselves grace and comfort. Good for you for putting this out here. I hope you feel a little better.