I can't even begin to imagine So sad for your loss and that your heart aches so.

Many MANY (((HUGS)))

That has to be the toughest thing on earth. *hug*

It's my Dad's birthday next week and I miss him a lot too.

(hug)

I check your blog once in a while and I'm glad to see that you're healing, slowly but surely.

I hope the warmest and fondest memories of Ian are a comfort to you.



You're missed over in the other bereavement group. We've not all checked this one out.


take care of yourself!

aA
kesha

edited to fix a typo

But here I can, for now.

I wish that rule would change... this week has been very bad for me - I think I need a professional's help. I'm healing, but I'm also sad all the damn time. Like I wrote, this took a piece of my soul. I feel broken, and have little confidence that I will ever get over that. My performance at work is sufferring, and I can't remember simple things that I should - like fixing my team's time cards, or the names of movies I saw last night. I'm stuck because I can't afford a therapist, and I make too much to get Medicaid.

Thanks for the concern though, it helps a little to have a method and platform to discuss these things. My boss doesn't give a damn, and my surviving son is only 16, and seeing me sad just makes him sad.

passed the year and a half mark and i'm still so messed up
i'm dying inside
can't afford professional help either
can't seem to focus
so damn sad
miss her so tragically much
i want my life back
i want her back
and i just can't seem to adjust/adapt or whatever the hell it is i'm supposed to be doing.

i've also wondered where you've been
unfortunately, i think i'm on the verge of losing my star as well

don't know what else to tell you. you're not alone, that's for sure. but that is hardly any comfort. at least i know it isn't for me--it doesn't take away the pain, the sting, the ache, the agony. most importantly it doesn't errase the loss.

Those are generally free. When I worked for hospice I ran a grief support group that was open to the community. Ironically, after I lost my son, I couldn't bring myself to attend a grief support group. It wasn't until I lost my mom to cancer on January 30th this year, on my son's birthday, that I pretty much melted down and realized I needed help. I was able to find a counselor through a free program which has been very helpful. Also have a Doctor who is in a clinic that goes on sliding scale so I got a prescription for Ativan and Prozac which have helped me more than I could ever admit. I tried being strong but when my mom passed, (she was the reason I survived my son's death) I just couldn't handle it anymore. Call around and see if you can find a hospice program that offers a support group or one of the support programs specifically for child loss like Compassionate Friends or Bereaved Parents USA.

I'm sure the anniversary has been very difficult.

I just read your blog. So touching.....VERY TOUCHING!. I'm just soaked in tears reading the song you wrote. I would love to hear it! Bless you all. I have a 9 year old son and I cannot imagine what you have been through. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts.