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2016 Postmortem
Related: About this forumAn Open Letter By A #NeverHillary Supporter Who Is Definitely Not Vladimir Putin
Hello. It is I, normal American voter of age group Millennium. Name Doug or something.
My guys, can you believe latest scandal in campaign of Hillary Clinton? This scandal is all my millennial friends talk about, as well as her many other scandals, and Game of Thrones. It is hot topic of conversation and snapchats when we get together to trade cassettes at hottest new borscht place (we are foodies).
We do not like Hillary Clinton, but not because she is woman, no no. We are young Americans with soft hands who do not think it is shameful to vote for a female who has never strangled a wolf. No, we do not like her because of the content of these emails.
These emails show that the Democratic National Committee has rigged the election in favor of Hillary Clinton! Shame! Shame! I will never vote for her, and neither will any of my friends in backwards baseball caps! It is wrong to rig elections, and not sensible and normal! I love basketball!
It is not important who hacked these emails or why. My friends Doug and Doug and my girlfriend Beyonce and I all agree on this. What if it was the Russian government? Wouldnt that be a frightening indication that Vladimir Putin is attempting to destabilize an American election and tip the balance in favor of Donald Trump, whose anti-NATO stance would potentially make it easier for Russia to invade countries in the old Soviet bloc? absolutely none of us said.
We were too busy playing Pokemon: Go!
We know nothing of Putin, except of course that he is handsome and strong, like a robot with tigers for hands, and Beyonce has many times dreamed of him shirtless upon his majestic horse.
We know only that we will never, ever, ever vote for Hillary Clinton. It is very important to our principles to not vote for this shame-woman. No matter if this means the election of Mr. Donald Trump. No matter who this hurts.
Or who it helps.
See you at the Justin Bieber concert!
Your definitely American friend,
Doug
My guys, can you believe latest scandal in campaign of Hillary Clinton? This scandal is all my millennial friends talk about, as well as her many other scandals, and Game of Thrones. It is hot topic of conversation and snapchats when we get together to trade cassettes at hottest new borscht place (we are foodies).
We do not like Hillary Clinton, but not because she is woman, no no. We are young Americans with soft hands who do not think it is shameful to vote for a female who has never strangled a wolf. No, we do not like her because of the content of these emails.
These emails show that the Democratic National Committee has rigged the election in favor of Hillary Clinton! Shame! Shame! I will never vote for her, and neither will any of my friends in backwards baseball caps! It is wrong to rig elections, and not sensible and normal! I love basketball!
It is not important who hacked these emails or why. My friends Doug and Doug and my girlfriend Beyonce and I all agree on this. What if it was the Russian government? Wouldnt that be a frightening indication that Vladimir Putin is attempting to destabilize an American election and tip the balance in favor of Donald Trump, whose anti-NATO stance would potentially make it easier for Russia to invade countries in the old Soviet bloc? absolutely none of us said.
We were too busy playing Pokemon: Go!
We know nothing of Putin, except of course that he is handsome and strong, like a robot with tigers for hands, and Beyonce has many times dreamed of him shirtless upon his majestic horse.
We know only that we will never, ever, ever vote for Hillary Clinton. It is very important to our principles to not vote for this shame-woman. No matter if this means the election of Mr. Donald Trump. No matter who this hurts.
Or who it helps.
See you at the Justin Bieber concert!
Your definitely American friend,
Doug
https://medium.com/@fullfrontalsamb/an-open-letter-by-a-neverhillary-supporter-who-is-definitely-not-vladimir-putin-37157d4c65d8#.sv2dw0z0b
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An Open Letter By A #NeverHillary Supporter Who Is Definitely Not Vladimir Putin (Original Post)
geek tragedy
Jul 2016
OP
Umm, it's supposed to be a paid Russian troll pretending to be a milennial.
geek tragedy
Jul 2016
#7
Little Star
(17,055 posts)1. lol
tonyt53
(5,737 posts)2. Ohhh you're gonna get hate mail.
NurseJackie
(42,862 posts)3. Ha!! :-D
guillaumeb
(42,641 posts)4. Wait until Doug and Beyonce meet Joni Ernst. eom
MADem
(135,425 posts)5. How many rubles for that opus, I wonder!!
"Doug!" Someone's been watching Dougie Howser rereuns, I'm thinking!!
Chiquitita
(752 posts)6. wow
really a thoughtless insult to millennials. Whoever wrote this has sad 50 year old+ syndrome (and I say this as someone from that demographic). No millennial hipsters who play Pokémon Go like Justin Bieber. Really a dumb attempt at humor.
geek tragedy
(68,868 posts)7. Umm, it's supposed to be a paid Russian troll pretending to be a milennial.
it's supposed to be cringe-worthy by missing the mark so badly
does this sound like something a milennial would write?
We know nothing of Putin, except of course that he is handsome and strong, like a robot with tigers for hands, and Beyonce has many times dreamed of him shirtless upon his majestic horse.
Chiquitita
(752 posts)10. oooohhh. Thanks. Too many layers
for my little brain!
geek tragedy
(68,868 posts)11. no sweat. it's pretty funny when you read it from that angle nt
Rex
(65,616 posts)8. I was trying to figure out why this looked like it was written by an imbecle.
Took me a moment, in Russia joke would be on me!
geek tragedy
(68,868 posts)9. this part is a pretty good clue
We know nothing of Putin, except of course that he is handsome and strong, like a robot with tigers for hands, and Beyonce has many times dreamed of him shirtless upon his majestic horse.
Rex
(65,616 posts)12. Took 3 sentences, but yeah by that part I was all like, "funny Bear and Bull story ha ha"!
Oh sorry, Trump riding a lion not bull.