Reply #29: Hmm [View All]

But why did I fail the manhood quiz?


"Your wife should school your children"

She will. I will. The schools will.

"Enjoy being a spiritual man in God's light"

I will.

"Get out of debt"

Good advice.

"Use the Internet to discuss current events"

Well, here I am.

"Take accredited school courses via the Internet"

I did one. Why, am I going to do something immoral on a college campus?

"Learn to play a musical instrument, dance, or draw"

Did that too.

"Do not date or marry an American woman"

That you can't doesn't mean I shouldn't.

"Don't use illicit or psychotropic prescription drugs"

Agreed.

"Vote like your life depends on it"

it does.

"If you are a skilled lover, you will realize that sex is naturally more enjoyable for the woman"

No, being that skilled isn't natural.

"Show by example the rewards of honesty"

Right on.

"Learn about sexually transmitted diseases and infection rates from around the world"

Good idea.

"Don't have kids until you are in your thirties"

I'm thinking more 27ish.

"Get rid of that nasty pot belly"

I definitely don't have one of those.

"Push for a federal flat tax of 10% plus a combined 5% state and local tax"

Bwaa ha ha ha ha!

"Do not treat pets like human beings"

Certainly not. However, that's no reason to be cruel.

"Do not cheat on your girlfriend or wife if you have agreed upon a monogamous relationship"

What other kind of relationship is there?

"Leave American women with nothing but dishonest and abusive men to spend their time with"

Never.

"Don't believe that violence is as funny or amusing as Hollywood says it is"

It isn't.

"Realize that decent men are valuable and sought after by women outside of America"

Inside America too. I hope.

"Don't be embarrassed about living a honest and humble life"

What's emberassing about that.

"Accept responsibility for your actions"

Yes.

"Legally pay for the music you download via the Internet"

Er, um, let's move on.

"Don't Smoke"

That's right.

"Don't engage in anal sex"

No comment.

"Do not marry any woman with a tattoo"

I do prefer natural skin color.

"Limit or end your alcohol consumption"

It never started.

"Realize that it's a honor and privilege to be a man"

I value my masculinity.

"Don't tease your friends"

I give a friendly jibe here and there.

"Treat women as unique but not as your equal"

You're a dumbass. Forgive me, that was rude.

"Don't go without sex for long periods of time."

I've gone more than 19 years so far, and I expect to go much longer.

"Start a small business in a foreign country"

What kind?

"Register to vote as an (n) Independent"

Why?

"Don't rely on the police to save you from danger"

Of course not.

"Your mind has the ability to fight most sicknesses that do not require the skills of a surgeon or certain anti-biotics"

Forgive me for not trusting your expertise.

"Many public school teachers are homosexuals, bi-sexuals, perverts, alcoholics, and lazy"

And you very well may be all of the above.

"Make a genuine effort to put public schools out of business by paying for private educational alternatives"

Eh?

"Ask long-time working or retired men for kind-hearted advice"

No, my closest friends aren't at that stage.

"Use statistics, reason, and logistics to maneuver thru society"

Reason, yes. The others are easily manufactured.

"Limit your exposure to commercial broadcast television"

Not too much good on.

"Honest people can always come to understanding and agreement"

Perhaps.

"Never stop dreaming of a better life for you and your family"

Never.

"The symmetrically balanced female form is God's most beautiful and complex piece of living artwork"

Yes, women's bodies" are beautiful and wonderful.