Reply #24: Hate binds you to him. The Buddhists say that hate binds you emotionally to the [View All]

object of your hatred. So getting rid of the hatred is good for you. The opposite of love is not hate, it is indifference. The goal for you is to feel completely indifferent about him. To not care what happens to him or whether you ever see him again. It may take a while to get to that point. But one day you will just say, "who cares," and it will be authentic. You truly won't care. That's where you want to get to. That whole relationship will be reduced down to a minor footnote on one page of a 20,000-page book. You will never totally, completely forget that he exists, as if you had never met him, but it will slowly and gradually reduce down to the point where it means nothing, he means nothing, there is no emotional response in you, the whole thing has reduced down to the significance of one tiny drop of ink on one book in China somebody wrote 700 years ago, and has no meaning or relevance to you and your life now. It takes time to get to that point, though, it won't happen overnight. If the thought of him comes to you, visualize him getting smaller and smaller each time that thought comes, and fading away a little each time. Eventually he will mean nothing.