Reply #9: Here's my iTunes review of the audiobook [View All]

Poor reworking of "The Stand"

Listening to this book, I couldn't help but wonder why Stephen King is still bothering to write fiction. He certainly doesn't need the money and, if this book is any indication, he is completely out of ideas.

"Cell" is basically "The Stand" with cell phones. All the same themes are there: a disease-decimated population; dream-driven congregations of the good and evil; a lonely group of heroes walking across a hellish, blasted landscape. Any "new" ideas are lifted directly from any number of pulp science fiction novels, going so far as to include the old (and thoroughly debunked) saw about humans using only 5% of their brains.

Even this would be tolerable if "Cell" included any of "The Stand"s tight plotting, wit, or compelling characters. Instead of a wonderful multi-threaded story, we're locked into a single plodding narrative with a fairly uninteresting protagonist. Dialog and descriptions are sometimes jarringly clumsy and supporting characters are so poorly realized that you're often confused as to who is talking.

The book is presented with a desultory reading by Campbell Scott. Neither Scott nor the production team seems to care about the material: Scott barely rises above a monotone and the recording includes a number of distracting overdubs that don't even bother to match voice.

If you're truly jonesing for a Stephen King novel, you'd be better off reaching for a tattered copy of "The Stand". It won't be new, but you'll at least have the satisfaction of knowing you didn't drop $32 on a tired retread.