Reply #18: Stop treating it like a drama, and see if the new relationship still is good. [View All]

I'm not meaning to be mean, but it almost seems like you are *creating* a dramatic love triangle (where there really isn't one). Six hundred mile long distance relationships don't usually last unless/until someone moves closer. Frankly (having been in a long distance relationship), it sounds like you are enjoying the perks / excitement of a relationship, without having to really be *in it* by dealing with the day to day non-romantic annoying crap.

ON EDIT: And there is nothing wrong with that, by the way! Enjoy it! :)

This person may be the perfect soul mate, but honestly, you are just dating. Give the father of your child the benefit of the doubt (of him being a real live adult), casually mention you are in the beginning stages of a potential relationship, and then drop the freaking subject. Let him go away to contemplate or call his friend to 'warn him' about you (because you know you and your ex didn't break up because you were the perfect girlfriend, while he sucked), let the new guy thank him for his concern, and then keep your ex out of your new relationship. (And don't take the warning personally, please! You know you are human and did things that irritated, too, because that is part of relationships in general.)

If you decide to marry or move in with the new guy in the next couple of years, no big deal. If the flirtation ends, no big deal. If you treat it like a "Romeo and Juliet" moment, you are going to get that -- if you treat it like no big deal, it isn't.

(And keep in mind this advice is coming from a woman who once lived with both my fiance, AND an ex-boyfriend, who was best friends with the guy I ended up marrying; we survived the rotating partner dance back in our mid-twenties, so a reasonably mature adult past the drama/angst stage should be fine.)

Good luck! :hi: