Reply #21: I'll be 57 in 3 months. A big problem is that I have become very set in my ways. [View All]

I had an English teacher my senior year in high school who told us that if we were not married by the time we were 30 that we would get set in our ways and it would be difficult to make that commitment. That is very true for me and I have never been married and at this point see absolutely no reason ever to be married. I am alone, but not lonely. I enjoy my solitude and love that I can do what I want, when I want and I do not have to consult with anyone or deal with anyone's moods (nor do they have to deal with mine although I am pretty even tempered).

I admit that when I was younger I always assumed that I would be married, but it just never happened and once I let go of the having to date and find someone it has been very freeing. I can enjoy women and appreciate an attractive woman without having to try anything and to play the game and be "on". I have let go of the weight of not finding anyone and that it must be because something is wrong with me.

The fact of the matter is that the older we get, especially in our 50s, the more baggage we have and the more baggage any women we might seek will have. There's not necessarily anything wrong with that, it's just a result of life and we all relate to people and judge them based upon past experiences and relationships which can be good or bad.

My choice not to date really only has meaning because it it a choice. I am not a hunk, but neither am I a troll. I am nice looking enough and at my age having a full head of non-gray hair is a plus. I have most of the qualities that women "claim" they are looking for, but I also got so sick of the games and dishonesty of dating with its elation and depression. Thanks, but no thanks--pass. This lad is leading the simple life now and enjoying it. (I have a tattoo from the movie "V for Vendetta" with the V logo and the word "FREEDOM" above it and "FOREVER" below it and it has taken on a new meaning now.) I love women, I just don't want to date them.