Reply #69: ok..I'll repeat.. [View All]

It means MEN need to look at their attitudes.Their position of privilege and quit abusing power.

PLease don't play games with domestic violence realities,because we DO live in a patriarchy that is getting more noxious to women by the day

<Reading this as a man who has been in abusive relationship myself, what I see you saying is: men are inherently abusive, and they are the only ones who need to "look at their attitudes.">

I never said ALL MEN are abusers.
I said ALL men do have a social privilege in this culture. And men abuse their social RANK without thinking it is abusive,It's the blindness of privilege I am speaking about here. A social position and power that men have that others do not,that comes with social rank. Why else do women get less pay for the same job? Men have a position of power denied to women in this culture.It's a fact.

<Also, please be aware that the 5% statistic you quote is misleading.>

Is it? I think police reports are pretty accurate for gathering statistics better than a religious organization ,or promise keepers or something like that...or.You know those fathers rights groups..
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Men's_rights
But there are other places to get statistics than father groups..like the Dept of Justice.
http://www.fair.org/index.php?page=1479
http://members.aol.com/asherah/cts.html


That said ..
I also know alot of abuse cases go unreported.Charges are not pressed when they should be .Both men who get battered and women who get battered,and it is staggering how many rape cases go unreported.It's awful.It is so WRONG.



<Women are less likely to be physically abusive than men, but are much more likely to be emotionally abusive than men. Studies which have investigated the occurrence of emotional abuse (I will do some research and find cites) show that some 25% of men suffer physical and/or emotional abuse from women intimates (wives, girl friends, etc.) As I am sure you know, emotional abuse can be far damaging that physical abuse.>

Will those stats be coming from "father's rights" sites? Did you know those "fathers" or mens movement sites are often funded by those "private" contributers" who coincidentally want to BAN gay marriage??!! Yes indeedy!...
http://nafcj.org/
http://www.now.org/issues/right/alerts/10-20-99.html
http://www.glennsacks.com/

Since more seasoned critics than I have denounced the twisted logic and ulterior motives of father's rights advocates -- big name supporters of father's custody include right-wing radio personality Glenn Sacks, archetypal anti-feminist Phyllis Schlafly, libertarian commentator Wendy McElroy, and masculinist Warren Farrell, who rated a section of his own in Susan Faludi's Backlash (Farrell's latest book purports that women are paid less because they're less willing, or less able, to compete on men's terms) -- there's really no need to go into the details of the weird disintegration of my communication with Ms. Stoddard.
http://www.mothersmovement.org/features/05/dads_rights/wounds_p2.htm

<No one is saying that resources should be taken away from the very real harm being done by men who abuse women.>

I didn't read that in your posts.Why are you assuming I thought you said that? I didn't.

But don't you dare try to shut up people who mention the very real harm being done by women who abuse men, and don't you dare make all men out to be abusers just because some men are.>

I will point out an abuse of cultural privilege when I see it.
I will shut abusers up regardless of their gender .
And I will expose manipulating neocon front organizations manipulating men.
I will not extend my sympathy that I have for abuse victims like you, to a political ,sexist,"privately funded" mens rights'Father"organization hooked up with the neocons.

And You know damn well I didn't shut you up.I can't shut you up..Get realistic here.. this is THE WEB and you can post here to your hearts content.I cannot shut you up here. I can just ignore you for myself if I choose to,you are not censored by me here .So why make such claims..You trying to incite something?


I Offered my sympathy to you and gave you some statistics that you didn't like to hear.Oh well..Shall I find more you don't want to hear? ? Where should I go ..hmm father's rights orgs? I asked who FUNDS these movements for mens rights talking about battered men the loudest??. So I found out. It's all private funders on the right wing,..The anti gay marriage, the neocon orgs.,"family values" churches. And right wing radio hosts..Fancy THAT!!So I have EVERY right to be suspicious of the "mens movement" agendas.

Funny how the"men's movements" numbers are so much higher than the department of justice's numbers.. why is that? Can you explain this?

If you were abused and I have no reason to doubt what you say is true,again I say to you,AGAIN,since you haven't noticed my sympathy directed twords you yet.. after repeating it for several posts, ALL DOMESTIC ABUSE IS WRONG.. Please, Get some HELP soon.Get out of the bad relationship if you are still with her,and get some help to heal NOW. You need to keep safe. You need to learn about abuse dynamics.You need a good counselor.
Take care.Please,look at and learn to recognize your triggers they might be interfering with your ability to clearly read my posts to you. I have PSTD I know myself how triggers mess with my head.Anyone who had been a victim of trauma or abuse can have triggers,So Take a deep breath and reread my posts slowly,I am not your ex.ok?? I am not her.