Pentagon mulling 'stealth sharks' to patrol the seas

Pentagon mulling 'stealth sharks' to patrol the seas

PARIS, March 1, 2006 (AFP) - The Pentagon is funding research into neural implants with the ultimate hope of turning sharks into "stealth spies" capable of gliding undetected through the ocean, the British weekly New Scientist says.

The research builds on experimental work to control animals by implanting tiny electrodes in their brain, which are then stimulated to induce a behavioural response.

"The Pentagon hopes to exploit sharks' natural ability to glide quietly through the water, sense delicate electrical gradients and follow chemical trails," says the report, carried in next Saturday's New Scientist.

"By remotely guiding the sharks' movements they hope to transform the animals into stealth spies, perhaps capable of following vessels without being spotted."
(snip/...)

http://www.politicalgateway.com/news/read.html?id=6386

I mean, what the f**k?

Haven't we all seen enough movies to know that ideas like these irrevocably turn out very bad for the team of researchers on the project, a hot shot team of U.S. Special Forces, a scantly clad beautiful woman, and a rugged protagonist?

Maybe there'll be video, so that hetero males can enjoy the scantily-clad, beautiful woman.

that involved sharks? Seems like they pretended to be pizza delivery guys...I don't know.. memory is old.. hell I'm old.

hilarious

Hilarious skit.

Candygram..

Why don't they go ahead and try to genetically enhance some Great White Sharks while they're at it? Maybe bring back the Megalodon - then they could use that as a weapon as well!

They've OD'd on so much of their own propaganda, they now really DO think real life works just like the movies...

Wasn't there a Don Knots movie where he was a fish helping the US Navy?

I guess it can be done after all!

but the rest of him is a dead give-way.

If I didn't say it, someone else would have.

bwahahahahah

"laser" ?

And made the same comment downstream.

mikey_the_rat

see, they're really doing stuff to keep us safe!!!!

You'll see, just as soon as we finish building that resort on Mars.

These repukes are so strong on defense, I feel safer already.

This report is coming out because a lot of people are opposed to turning Flipper into a torpedo.

"No, ma'am, that was a shark we blew up next to the hull of that Venezualan tanker, not a a dolphin."

Nobody likes sharks, much.

to shave and dress. Toilet training was no problem but they did have some trouble keeping the animals behavior under control though: it would steal things, lie and cheat no matter what task it was given. They tried to teach it to ride a bike too, but that was a disaster.

Bravo!

Your tax dollars at work.

:rofl:

...and get sharks with frickin' laser beams in their heads.

No halfway measures!

before installing neural implants in humans.


As quoted in Brainwashing America by Dr. Norman Livergood

....and they've been doing this for two decades already. :tinfoilhat: :shrug:

what other creature most resembles them?

to go back into the water!

Jaws was scary and so some FrankenShark would be doubleplus scary...hope it works out better than:

Armed and dangerous - Flipper the firing dolphin let loose by Katrina

It may be the oddest tale to emerge from the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. Armed dolphins, trained by the US military to shoot terrorists and pinpoint spies underwater, may be missing in the Gulf of Mexico.

Experts who have studied the US navy's cetacean training exercises claim the 36 mammals could be carrying 'toxic dart' guns. Divers and surfers risk attack, they claim, from a species considered to be among the planet's smartest. The US navy admits it has been training dolphins for military purposes, but has refused to confirm that any are missing.

...

Leo Sheridan, 72, a respected accident investigator who has worked for government and industry, said he had received intelligence from sources close to the US government's marine fisheries service confirming dolphins had escaped.
http://observer.guardian.co.uk/international/story/0,6903,1577753,00.html

Luckily some people aren't fooled...my fav Iraq quote:



'Flipper's fucked, mate. The dolphins have had all
this amazing publicity but as soon as they put one in
the water it shot through. There's a war going on and
Flipper goes AWOL.
If you put one to work in Sydney
Harbour it would mark a million things because it
can't tell the difference between a washing machine
and a mine. The bottom line, mate, is it's a fish.
It's also a very smart fish so how do you know it
hasn't just gone off for a feed instead of working and
then thought, "Hang on, I'd better mark a few things
or they won't give me any fish when I get back".'

- An Australian Navy diver on the use of dolphins in
mine clearing operations in the port city of Umm Qasr

Wrong Answer, idiot. It's NOT a fish. It's a proto-sentient (if not fully sentient) mammal. If it doesn't know a bomb from a washing machine it's because it can't tell one machine from another.

they can invent radar and sonar and global spy satellites.

the "what the hell are they thinking" category.

Remote control sharks? Methinks some folks are just bored with the toys they already have and want new, more interesting toys.

Pinheads.

Freedom is on the march. So is mind control via perception management.

Cyberkinetics links
http://www.cyberkineticsinc.com/content/technology/platformtechnology.jsp#Top

http://biz.yahoo.com/e/050328/cykn.ob8-k.html

Remote Behavioral Influence Technology Evidence by John J. McMurtrey
http://www.datafilter.com/mc/remoteBehavioralInfluence.html

Decoding Minds, Foiling Adversaries by Sharon Berry
http://www.angelfire.com/or/mctrl/decoding.htm

Perception Management
http://www.au.af.mil/info-ops/perception.htm#

Previous "research and development" via the Third Reich
http://facultystaff.vwc.edu/~dgraf/nazidocs.txt

http://www.gwu.edu/~nsarchiv/radiation/dir/mstreet/commeet/meet13/brief13/tab_f/br13f3.txt

http://www.gpc.edu/~shale/humanities/composition/assignments/experiment/docs.html

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly
We never thought it was really safe to go back in the water, and Benchley's new eco-thriller exploits the fear he engendered in Jaws . Here the menace is a creature spawned by a demented Nazi scientist, which has hatched 50 years later in a quiet Atlantic fishing community. Simon Chase has dropped his society wife and infant son, Max, to finish school and start the Osprey Island Marine Institute near Long Island's North Shore. Shark studies are his speciality. Chase fears the responsibilities of fatherhood, but when Max, now 12, visits, the two get on famously and soon Max has the run of the institute. Then, a crew tracking a pregnant Great White named Jaws spot a porpoise with a claw gash in its tail and see massive kills of sea life; when they then observe the same claw marks on Jaws herself, Chase knows "there's something out there." Enter Dr. Amanda Macy, who studies whales using sea lions with strapped-on video cameras. Macy leases the institute, both solving Chase's money woes and making first contact with the unknown menace. Soon Macy's camera gets a shot of a steel-clawed hand grappling with a sea lion. After additional bloody encounters at sea, the beast comes ashore, eventually to threaten Amanda and Max. Benchley's writing is fast-paced, and he alternates the tension with poignant family scenes and ample amounts of marine ecology

If not, what's the point?

Perhaps they are working on an alternate program involving ill-tempered sea bass.

mikey_the_rat

#15 I believe.

there are certain things about nature that have started fighting back.

Elephants in Africa and India have started becoming dangerous to humans, where before, elephants served as transporters and helpers of humans.

Bees in the western hemisphere, who have been cross-bread with african bees, and "killer bees" are now spreading daily further North across the U.S.

Fire ants from s. america are also spreading throughout the U.S.

Nature is out of balance due to human "meddling", and there's payback, pure and simple, in the long run. Those who don't see it coming have their heads buried in the sand.

When all the doctor Strangelove types are running the most well-funded (OUR TAX DOLLARS), ominous military industrial complex in the world, we're bound to have problems.

All our "missing" trillions of dollars of tax money are ending up, apparently, in Area 51.

This is so far beyond "unacceptable" that it just boggles the mind. Leave the sharks & dolphins out of it, and leave the rest of nature alone, Bush. You've put together the most inhuman, and inhumane, team of megalomaniacs in the history of the world, and given them a blank check.

And your REPUBLICAN loonies in places of power are enabling every move. The whole thing is criminal, sinister, and EVIL.

This is life under REPUBLICAN rule.

:kick::kick::kick:

Since their killer chimp experiment worked, I guess it's to be expected.