bias in a soup kitchen??

http://www.texastravesty.com/2004_04/news_soup.php

Soup kitchen charged with liberal bias
Student complains of ‘unfair’ leftist rhetoric, organic soap

by J.J. Hermes, Design Director


After using a hairnet, be sure to cut it up so brainless animals don’t choke on it and die.
AUSTIN – Finance sophomore Jack Hughes filed a formal complaint to the City of Austin concerning the liberal bias at a local soup kitchen, Caritas Loaves and Fishing Community Kitchen, where he was forced to perform community service for his third speeding ticket. The move marks a growing trend among conservatives rallying together against what they see as a liberal bias in mainstream America.

“I am tired of the left’s indoctrination,” said Hughes. “They control the media, they infect the universities; enough is enough.”

Most of Hughes’ resentment came from a comment by soup kitchen employee Tonya Nichols. After a homeless teenager received her ration, Nichols murmured audibly, “No child left behind, indeed, Mr. Bush.”

“It was ludicrous and totally unrelated to handing out food,” said Hughes. “I am all for the First Amendment, but there is a time and a place. Unless directly related to what is going on, political opinions should be kept to oneself.”

Hughes also held contempt for some of the homeless who had come to receive a meal, citing their attitude and attire as purely liberal. Hughes reported that a man dressed entirely in black leather harassed him for his neatly-trimmed haircut, dubbing him a “slave to the machine of militarism and greed.”

Katherine Sanders, a regular volunteer at the Caritas Loaves and Fishing Community Kitchen for over 10 years, found the situation distressing.

“It disturbs me that people like Hughes want to squelch political dissent,” said Sanders. “It seems that the only opinions he is willing to hear are those that are in line with his own.”

Hughes also noted the “malodorous, long-haired” appearance of his co-volunteers as an indication of society’s liberal bias.

“The staff in the kitchen is undoubtedly a monopoly for the political left,” said Hughes. “They look down on someone clean cut like myself immediately; they automatically single me out for ridicule. Some of the volunteers have turned working in the soup kitchen as a soap box for their anti-Bush, anti-capitalism views, and I will not stand for it.”

Some in the kitchen were left wondering how such a loaded label took shape from the comments or actions.

“ takes such a black-and-white approach to politics,” said Nichols. “It seems as though he wants to homogenize thought.”

Although Hughes was incited by this specific incident, he claimed that it stood for something much bigger.

“I think there should be a fair and balanced reform of the liberal indoctrination that goes on in the world, this soup kitchen being a starting point. It is clearly the first step in delivering America from the evil forces of terrorism, despotism, and liberalism.”

The city where Freepers' heads explode.

There's also this really great Vietnamese Restaurant just off Sixth Street...

we can eliminate a few of the soup kitchens and homeless people.

Hmmmmmmm.... I think the last line is a giveaway.

... finance sophomore Jack Hughes should spend some time on a chain gang. No liberal chit-chat, just the tap-tap-tapping of his hammer on the gravel.

Snotty little fucker.

i honestly hope no one is this stupid

:eyes:

What did this loser think was going to happen at a food kitchen? How does he think people look, when they're homeless and hungry? Did he really think that anyone associated with a soup kitchen would be a billionaire for bush?

The soup kitchen must be full of saints. They allowed this hideously toxic moron to work of his ticket and possibly learn something.

It shouldn't, but it surprises me that there are people like this in the world. People whose idea of volunteering at a soup kitchen is standing on a soapbox and mocking people in need.

Obviously a concerned and patriotic nazi..er I mean American.
He believes in free speech as long as you do not disagree with his distorted point of view, so in that case in his words "shut the farg" up. What an icehole!

I said it was the Texas Onion!

it's a spoof.

...well, don't I feel foolish.

of so many "conservatives" these days makes this satire very plausible.