Now HERE'S a crew of Scary Marys...

http://www.raptureletters.com/

<snip>

After the rapture, there will be a lot of speculation as to why millions of people have just disappeared. Unfortunately, after the rapture, only non believers will be left to come up with answers. You probably have family and friends that you have witnessed to and they just won't listen. After the rapture they probably will, but who will tell them?

We have written a computer program to do just that. It will send an Electronic Message (e-mail) to whomever you want after the rapture has taken place, and you and I have been taken to heaven.

If you wish to do something now that will help your unbelieving friends and family after the rapture, you need to add those persons email address to our database. Their names will be stored indefinitely and a letter will be sent out to each of them on the first Friday after the rapture. Then they will receive another letter every friday after that.

<snip>

:silly:

Would detect "Rapture?" Would having my fiance over trigger it?

can I have the keys to your car?

Thanks.

to a post rapture world. Millions less fundies and born again's sounds quite lovely actually. Peace will likely break out worldwide.

should all go write one to shrub, et al.

"so long, suckahz!"


peace

after Hal Lindsay made it into a pop phenomenon, these guys still insist they're gonna be raptured Any Minute Now. Talk about sheephood.

After the Rapture who will send the e-mails? Minor detail I guess.

so when they actually split it will not get the 'do not send' command and off they go. The funny part is that some flunky is waiting for the rapture and each week has to tell the box, 'no not yet'. Now that's gotta be a major bore. I hope I get one of those emails pretty soon since I could use a new TV and a car. Then I'll rent out their place.

Nah. They've probably got some nihilist Goth that they know will be around on the payroll. In a few years, they'll get sick of paying him for nothing and shut the thing down.

jesusfuckingchristyouactuallybelievethisshit@hotmail.com

:eyes:
:grr:

By now, you will have noticed that I am gone.

Don't worry, the black helicopters didn't get me. I was taken up to heaven (tm) by jebus. That's right, I'm in eternal paridise, while you guys get stuck down there. Hope y'all don't get hit by the flaming rocks that are gonna be raining down in a couple of weeks!

Anyway, here are some notes for y'all....

To my business partners. You may have noticed that 4 million and Miss Stein, our 22 year old secretary have gone missing. Jebus wanted me to start a branch office up here, so I took these with me. Our accountant, St. Matthew, will send y'all the spreadsheets.

To my wife. Well, as I said, I'm in heaven (tm). I really really am. Do not look in the Cayman Islands cause I'm not there sipping drinks with a 22 year old blonde. I am with Jebus in eternal bliss. Please send my stock portfolio to my twin brother that I never told you about care of Rapture getaways.

for them to leave their literature in? Won't the recipients of post rapture emails feel cheated that there are no cartoons of people burning in hell attached?

Can you imagine when all of these nutjobs start getting spam messages like "Re: ****!!!Make it harder, longer......" and "Fwd: give her the big one she likes, you like it ,.,./ tCheap Viagra meds! wnldsl... @kljdlkfj30-d9fj"

Just watched "The Jesus Factor" on PBS. Whoa!!!How terribly sad that a man that seems to believe he is doing "God's" will has so coldly ordered executions of other human beings, the mentally ill, the mentally retarded and the repentant. How sad that so many can admire a man that could make fun of a woman on death row asking for mercy.He did not have to grant a stay, but why did he need to be cruel? Is that how the evangelical christians view compassionate conservatism????? It seems that they believe the ends justify the means, isn't that one of the tenets of Satanism?? And sadder still that a country that I believed to have more compassionate people than vengeance seeking ones would allow such a man to be appointed as the president.

she's Vicki S. Welcome to DU! :D :toast:

Read "The Jesus Landing Pad."
(And people say there's no significant difference between Kerry and Chimpy?!)
http://www.villagevoice.com/issues/0420/perlstein.php

more like 7000 or so. Just think of the disappointment if they aren't sucked up to the great beyond.

.... this planet will be un-idioted.

that mails out "WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE?" messages to these idiots every week.

Dobson...

Their crazy leftie fringe just wants universal health care.

so we won't have to put up with this shit tomorrow