OK, I’ve decided that I’m a conservative:

If you’re not bothering me, I’ll leave you alone. If I’m not bothering you, then you leave me alone.

If you threaten me or my family with physical harm, I will do my best to kill you.

If I screw up, then I’ll fix it. If you screw up, YOU fix it.

Simple courtesy: I’m not going to shit where you eat. Don’t shit where I do.

If you have to take money from me in taxes, don’t waste it.

People who lie & cheat are not to be trusted – not with my children, not with my money, not with my liberty.

Power corrupts, so nobody should be allowed to have it for too long.

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I think these points can be agreed upon by most people. They DO NOT describe the current crop of criminals in the Republican party.

Can you think of any more?

Can we be conservative liberals?

I've often said to my republican uh,friends, (I don't really like them that much) that I've got plenty of "conservative values" but I also believe a person's right to choose for themselves who they worship, what they do with their own bodies and how they love is up to them and should not be legislated by anyone.

I love pointing out to these idiot sheeple just what their 'conservative party' really has lead to: PNAC.

but fake conservatives are just too damn stupid to even know the difference.

The ONLY thing they think of when you say "conservative" is godhatesfags.

no dang kidding.

Yes here are some more:

Real conservatives want to conserve safe drinking water, forests, clean air, and pollution free oceans teeming with mature ocean biodiversity.

Real conservatives conserve species, national parks, beaches, and undeveloped areas. Real conservatives conserve old growth forest, nonarable prairie, and natural desert.

Real conservatives conserve equal rights for all Americans. Real conservatives conserve religious liberty, including the liberty to not have religion.

Real conservatives conserve the concept of privacy, both in the bedroom and in our choices of reading materials at the library and bookstores.

Real conservatives conserve the ideals of America: life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness . . .for everyone.

Real conservatives conserve our principled stands against pre-emptive war and torture.

Oh the list goes on and on and on.

A neocon conservative wouldn't know a real conservative if it teabagged him on the chin.

"If you threaten me or my family with physical harm, I will do my best to kill you."
I don't believe in this behavior. I am a firm believer in Law & Order.

"If you have to take money from me in taxes, don’t waste it."
How would you describe waste? Welfare or Warfare?

"Simple courtesy: I’m not going to shit where you eat. Don’t shit where I do."
Does this just apply to eating? and does smoking equate to shitting?

"If I screw up, then I’ll fix it. If you screw up, YOU fix it."
How about when it is nobodies screw up but help is still needed?

I prefer to abide by the Golden Rule and I realize that is not a Conservative Viewpoint..

Being for law-and-order isn't incompatible with that.

What is wasteful can be a matter for debate. I think we can all agree that it's wasteful to spend $5000 for a hammer, $10000 for a toilet seat, $20000 for a sofa, etc, etc. I don't think it's wasteful to feed, shelter & educate people.

I've used "shit" as a synonym for pollution, so "yes"

Generally, people should be responsible for their own actions. Part of being responsible is asking for help when needed. Part of being responsible is OFFERING to help when needed. After all, our national motto *is* "E Pluribus Unum"