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As a woman I want to tell the Women of the Alpizar Family, I know You will learn that the Pain becomes a shrine in itself to your own Strength (never to be "given to 'Jesus'", or anyone else - Yours!) - The Pain IS part of the Sweetness in remembering ALL of the Blessings Rigoberto Really +Did+ Bring into All of Your/Their Lives, i.e. the significance of empirical Facts of his Life are not changed by his death, they still stand for themselves. I hope you don't let the Darkness of how he died drown the Light of His Life with You. The Darkness can't be erased, but it can become a counter-weight to the strength of Your Spirit (not a church's, not some artificial group's, not even Jesus's, but your own Spirit.
Like my Husband's, Rigoberto's "individuality" may have been "harvested"; this is because he matters. What happened to Rigoberto can therefore be good, though Bitter, "food" to y/our Lives together. You can see him still if you Look and Listen, "now", somehow, Any-How, Any-"where", because That Which Called Rigoberto Forth has not finished what "it" is saying, on so many levels.
I guess you might say remembering Rigoberto's Goodness makes "it" live still in All of You, born out and supported by the facts of the real blessings of what "was-is" your Life Together; You can See his presence engraved in your physical life because it is a concrete reality (that would, BTW, be entirely different if Rigoberto had been somehow different than precisely who he "was"). Perhaps Rigoberto, like Others, was/is/were "ripe" Fruit, changed now into Orders of Other-ness, and whatever that turns out to "be", we are faced with the choice/task of "tuning" in, or not, to feed our Souls, or not.
In any case, You will See Him "again", because Whatever-IS is not Limited to our immature (often regressive) perceptions.
Let the Pain be constant Food to Your Strength for the Exploration.
Hare Krsna! Hare Rama!
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