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Your Favorite "Nonsense Marketing Feature"

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Robb Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-11-04 09:30 AM
Original message
Your Favorite "Nonsense Marketing Feature"
On the ancient amp that powers my computer speakers is the phrase "Duo Beta Circuit", stamped proudly on the front to make one think (I assume) other, lesser amplifiers have at best a Mono Beta Circuit. Whatever the heck that is. :eyes:
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Commie Pinko Dirtbag Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-11-04 09:33 AM
Response to Original message
1. This omega something they advertise in milk (nt)
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Goldom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-11-04 09:34 AM
Response to Original message
2. How about Most Hated...
HEMI. Dear God, I hate that stupid thing. I don't care if you have a HEMI, if you can race faster between stopping at two stoplights, nor that your baby can say it. I get 50MPG, so NYAH.
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meegbear Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-11-04 09:34 AM
Response to Original message
3. Retsin ...
the magic ingredient in Certs. It's vegetable oil.
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eyesroll Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-11-04 09:37 AM
Response to Original message
4. Joe-mentum?
Actually, my favorite nonsense marketing is when the sticker on the pet food says "Improved taste!" How do they know?

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daveskilt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-11-04 09:51 AM
Response to Original message
5. immodium extra strength, or magnum large condoms
I mean, who says I think I'll take the regular strength immodium so I can shit my brains out for a few extra minutes.

And as for the condoms - "good morning miss can I have a packet of extra small condoms please?"

I also hate the HEMI, the orgasm shampoo and anything low carb.

Of course I am looking for a marketing job right now and would happily churn out more of this crap given half a chance.
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TXlib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-11-04 09:52 AM
Response to Original message
6. I hate when they make non-value-added things out to be selling points
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Rabrrrrrr Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-11-04 11:25 AM
Response to Reply #6
10. with FULLY ADJUSTABLE volume knob
and FLEXIBLE speaker wires!
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tekriter Donating Member (734 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-11-04 09:54 AM
Response to Original message
7. Two good ones...
There are some disgusting processed breakfast frozen things on the market called ...

"New Traditions".

And a few years ago I bought some new Franklin softball batting gloves that were made with ...

"Digital Leather"
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jburton Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-11-04 10:48 AM
Response to Reply #7
8. Digital Leather reminds me of one...
"Genuine Man-made Materials"

On a men's wallet.

:crazy:
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Jeff in Cincinnati Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-11-04 11:21 AM
Response to Original message
9. "All New"
"Law and Order" is a serial offender at this one. In addition to being "ripped from the headlines," they constantly advertise next week's show as being "all new," as opposed to...what? One half is new and the other half is a rerun of "Home Improvement?" I don't get it.
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Tummler Donating Member (836 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-11-04 11:25 AM
Response to Original message
11. Cheap DVDs have a lot of 'em
"Interactive menus," "chapter selections," "shiny surface that casts rainbows," etc., are some of the awesome "special features" listed on bare-bones DVDs.
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Rabrrrrrr Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-11-04 11:26 AM
Response to Original message
12. Can't believe it didn't come up first - the finest CORINTHIAN leather!
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