If I ruled the world...

This weekend my husband came up with a great, "If I ruled the world..."

If I ruled the world I would drag neo-cons out in to the streets and pay homeless people to kick them until they passed out.

If figure that since neo-cons don't care if people are poor and homeless, those people hurt by their fascist policies should get a little back.

There would be special events for the likes of Limbaugh, Hannity, Coulter, and the entire Bush cabal. I figure, rent out a stadium and make it a spectator sport. People would enter a lottery type situation and if chosen would be allowed to kick those folks really hard, at length, in front of a live stadium audience....

If you ruled the world, what would you do to the neo-cons?

and give it to working people.

If I ruled the world . . . every anti-choicer would be held financially responsible for children abroad and at home who are left motherless because of unsafe abortions.

. . . every legislator who votes for "welfare reform" would have to try to survive for 6 months on the benefits provided while taking into account the restrictions, such as finding child care and money to pay the bills.

. . . legislators and advocates of standardized testing would have to take the 12th grade test tied to graduation. If they fail, they lose their seats.

make them pose in compromising sexual positions while wrestling in a pool of extra-virgin olive oil, and video the whole thing for the benefit of posterity. Or...sentence them to a lifetime of hard labor at the Angola prison farm in Louisiana under the supervision of sadistic guards whom they would have to call "Boss." :D

force them into a continuous war for favoritism (and I mean on an organizational/corporate level like several prominent houses fighting against one another) until they destroy, then with my awesome wealth and power, I would destroy the winner of my little game and usher in a new era of peace and prosperity for all.

Basically, I'd be Ming the Merciless.

Words by Leslie Bricusse, sung by the inimitable Tony Bennett.

If I ruled the world
Ev'ry day would be the first day of spring
Ev'ry heart would have a new song to sing
And we'd sing
Of the joy every morning would bring

If I ruled the world
Ev'ry one would be as free as a bird
Ev'ry voice would be a voice to be heard
Take my word
We would treasure each day that occurred

My world would be a beautiful place
Where we would weave such wonderful dreams
My world would wear a smile on its face
Like the man in the moon has when the moon beams

If I ruled the world
Ev'ry one would say the world was their friend
There'd be happiness that no one could end
No, my friend
Not if I ruled the world

Every head would be held up high
There'd be sunshine in everyone's sky
If the day ever dawned
When I ruled the world

This is beautiful, but the bad guys need to suffer a little karmic retribution.

And no one to fight with.

That would drive them crazy. bwah-ha-ha-ha-haaaaaa....

They must pay for their crimes against humanity.
I'm thinking something along the lines of the Nuremberg Trials.

I would stop the war and make everyone own a pet".

There you have it, from the eyes of a 5 year old boy.

If I ruled the world, I would make the neocons enlist in the service and fight the wars they have started.

a dozen .22s, ammo, and a copy of The Fountainhead. Then I'd come back in a few weeks to clean up.

*If I ruled the world bullies would be seen as the social toxins they are.

If I ruled the world political/social power would be meausured by how much you shared what you have with others with out expectations of profit(includiung financial wealth)and what your character was like.
Instead of charisma,looks or telling people what they like to hear and cash.

If I ruled the world there would be no corporations,the people who run a business are responsible for it.
If I ruled the world all taxes would be PROGRESSIVE.

If I ruled the world,an Understanding of Philosophy and an ability to think beyond simplicities would be encouraged,it would be as important as reading and writing.

If I ruled the world media and such would wbe exposed and shamed for manipulate opinions or manufacture consent.
If I ruled the world we would all be different and equal.
The rights of the person and the community would both be respected.
Children would have rights to a safe haven ,to escape bad parents.

If I ruled the world people,the environment and animals would be respected as our kin..all killing for food would be done in a humane way and factory farming would not exist.There would be spaces just for wildlife,and The corporate polluters of today,would have to clean up thier messes. Mad cow tests for all cows chickens and any other animals we eat.

If I ruled the world I would educate people about the i8mportance of sexual responsibilities ,birth control and encourage them to use it and tell the religious who react,to put a sock in it and why.

If I ruled the world Everyone would have the right to food shelter,warmth,healthcare and free of abuses and have a right to thier own voice,self expression.Anything that doesen't involve domination,violating consent sadism,abuse or manipulation of others.

If I ruled the world all School would not be grade based or authoritarian run,and the bullies would go to bully school(a therapy school) to teach them how to empathize with others before they get set in thier ways.

If I ruled the world all Religion would be seen as a personal quest to find your god in the way you see it,,not a political organization.

If I ruled the world all scientists would be responsible for thier inventions and the resulting impacts of them on the enviornment,people ect.in the future(Teach them to have a little forsightand caution in thier thinking)

If I ruled the world there would be no place for elitism.
If I ruled the world differences in people would be allowed.Diversity a good thing not to be feared or controlled.There would be no forcing of others to be as each other,normal would be a myth.

If I ruled the world I'd get rid of suburbia.
Redesign cities/towns to be car free.
I would call a lawn(green rectangles) the silly thing that it is.

If I ruled the world all funding and support for eugenics would stop.

If I ruled the world,war conquest,resource thieving,and empire would be illegal.

If I ruled the world I would notallow myself to keep secrets that citizens don't have.

If I ruled the world the press would be free and the editors could not cocerce reporters..
If I ruled the world markets would not be free,and companies would not be permitted to get big.

Just my 2 cents..meow..

should be enough to make their heads explode spontaneously. I'd strap known RW nuts in front of a TV showing CNN's coverage of my benevolent rule (public education, progressive taxation, true church/state separation, you know the drill) and allow people to place bets on the exact time of the inevitable craneal explosion. That would be my official state lottery.

That's assuming the better aspects of humanity ever regain control of this shithole of a world they've created. :puke:

(edit: Removed unneeded commentary)

Let me tell you the truth. If I ruled the world, everyone would be kissing my ass, and I'd have like, a real big ego. And I'd enjoy it.

BTW, I would also use my extreme almighty leadership to do such petty things, and I would grant myself the legal authority to bitchslap anyone I wanted, just for my own amusement. I'd test it out on a Melissa that I know...

"If I Ruled The World"
(feat. Lauryn Hill)


Life..... I wonder....
Will it take me under.... I don't know



Imagine smoking weed in the streets without cops harassin
Imagine going to court with no trial
Lifestyle cruising blue behind my waters
No welfare supporters more conscious of the way we raise our daughters
Days are shorter, nights are colder
Feeling like life is over, these snakes strike like a cobra
The world's hot my son got not evidently
It's elementary, they want us all gone eventually
Trooping out of state for a plate knowledge
of coke was cooked without the garbage we'd all have the top dollars
Imagine everybody flashin, fashion
Designer clothes, lacing your click up with diamond vogues
Your people holdin dough, no parole
No rubbers, go in raw imagine law with no undercovers
Just some thoughts for the mind
I take a glimpse into time
watch the blimp read "The World Is Mine"



If I ruled the world
Imagine that
I'd free all my sons, I love em love em baby
Black diamonds and pearls
Could it be, if you could
be mine, we'd both shine
If I ruled the world
Still livin for today, in
these last days and times



The way to be, paradise like relaxin black, latino and anglo-saxon
Armani exchange the reins
Cash, Lost Tribe of Shabazz, free at last
Brand new whips to crash then we laugh in the iller path
The Villa house is for the crew, how we do
Trees for breakfast, dime sexes and Benz stretches
So many years of depression make me vision
The better livin, type of place to raise kids in
Open they eyes to the lies history's told foul
But I'm as wise as the old owl, plus the Gold Child
Seeing things like I was controlling, click rollin
Trickin six digits on kicks and still holdin
Trips to Paris, I civilized every savage
Gimme one shot I turn trife life to lavish
Political prisonner set free, stress free
No work release purple M3's and jet skis
Feel the wind breeze in West Indies
I make Coretta Scott-King mayor the cities and reverse themes to Willies
It sounds foul but every girl I meet to go downtown
I'd open every cell in Attica send em to Africa



If I ruled the world
Imagine that
I'd free all my sons, I love em love em baby
Black diamonds and pearls
Could it be, if you could
be mine, we'd both shine
If I ruled the world
Still livin for today, in
these last days and times

And then we'll walk right up to the sun
Hand in hand
We'll walk right up to the sun
We won't land
We'll walk right up to the sun
Hand in hand
We'll walk right up to the sun
We won't land



You'd love to hear the story how the thugs live in worry
Duck down in car seats, heat's mandatory
Runnin from Jake, gettin chased, hunger for papes
These are the breaks many mistakes go down out of state
Wait, I had to let it marinate we carry weight
Tryin to get laced, flip the ace stack the safe
Millionaire plan to keep the gat with the cop camera
Makin moves in Atlanta, back and forth scrambler
Cause you could have all the chips, be poor or rich
Still nobody want a nigga havin shit
If I ruled the world and everything in it, sky's the limit
I push a Q-45 Infinit
It wouldn't be no such thing as jealousies or B Felonies
Strictly living longevity to the destiny
I thought I'd never see but reality struck
Better find out before your time's out, what the fuck??



If I ruled the world
Imagine that
I'd free all my sons, I love em em baby
Black diamonds and pearls
Could it be, if you could
be mine, we'd both shine
If I ruled the world
Still livin for today, in
these last days and times

If I ruled the world, if I ruled, if I ruled
Imagine that
I'd free all my sons, if I ruled, if I ruled
I love em love em baby
Black diamonds and pearls, black dimaonds
Could it be, if you could
black diamonds
be mine, we'd both shine
If I ruled the world
Still livin for today, in
these last days and times

If I ruled the world, if I ruled
if I ruled, I'd free all my sons
black diamonds, I love em love em baby
Black diamonds and pearls, if I ruled
If I ruled the world

If I ruled the world
I love em love em baby!!

While listening to Bobby Vinton's greatest hits.

That'll teach 'em.