Chickenhawks Of The Sea

From April:


Jessica's Political Favors

They say politics makes strange bedfellows, but when does "strange" veer off into "wacky"? Here's the answer: Preternaturally perky starlet Jessica Simpson is pals with Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld, one of the least perky government officials ever, reports Us Weekly. And the "Newlyweds" star plans to exploit their friendship for all it's worth (value still to be determined).

Joe Simpson, Jessica's exceedingly involved dad and manager, tells the mag that he's asked Rumsfeld to cameo as himself on his daughter's still-untitled ABC sitcom pilot ('cause when we think comedy, we think Rumsfeld). Another Republican asked to appear: California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger. "We're friends with Donald Rumsfeld and with Schwarzenegger," Joe explains, adding that he hopes they'll agree to "tongue-in-cheek" interviews with Mrs. Nick Lachey's TV reporter character. The Simpsons are also pursuing Donald Trump, who owes them a sit-down as payback for subjecting Jessica to Omarosa's antics on "The Apprentice."

http://entertainment.msn.com/celebs/article.aspx?news=156467

..apparently no one else shares my twisted humor.