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A "Yo Mama" War... Let's get crackalakin!!

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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:24 PM
Original message
A "Yo Mama" War... Let's get crackalakin!!
Edited on Tue May-25-04 10:24 PM by MrScorpio
Yo mama so fat when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up
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kanrok Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:25 PM
Response to Original message
1. Yo Mama's so fat
I have to pack a lunch to walk around her.
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:27 PM
Response to Reply #1
4. Yo mama's so fat
You haveta roll over twice to get off her...
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:27 PM
Response to Reply #4
5. Your mama's so fat

That's a real horse on her Polo shirt.
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:36 PM
Response to Reply #5
17. Yo mama's so stupid
That she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order!
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:37 PM
Response to Reply #17
18. Your mama's so stupid

She went to Orlando, saw a sign that said:

"Disneyworld, LEFT"

So she turned around and went home.
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:41 PM
Response to Reply #18
25. Yo mama's so stupid
When you stand next to her you hear the ocean!
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:42 PM
Response to Reply #25
26. Yo mama's so stupid

Her job told her she had to take a drug test, so she said, "I'm gonna go home and study!"
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:44 PM
Response to Reply #26
29. Yo mama's so lazy
She thinks a two-income family is where yo daddy has two jobs
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:53 PM
Response to Reply #29
46. Yo mama's so lazy

She ate her food stamps.
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LincolnMcGrath Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:25 PM
Response to Original message
2. Yo mama 's so skinny her
nipples touch
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:28 PM
Response to Reply #2
6. Yo mama's so fat
Even Bill Gates couldn't pay for her liposuction!
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 11:00 PM
Response to Reply #2
56. Yo mama's so skinny

when she's pregnant, you can see the baby!
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 11:05 PM
Response to Reply #56
60. Yo mama's so poor
She drives a roach
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:26 PM
Response to Original message
3. Yo mama got pulled over in the HOV lane

She told the cop "I didn't see that V!"
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:31 PM
Response to Reply #3
9. Yo mama's so stupid
That under "Education" on her job apllication, she put "Hooked on Phonics."
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:31 PM
Response to Reply #9
10. Yo mama's so stupid

It takes her two hours to watch "60 Minutes."
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:34 PM
Response to Reply #10
15. Yo mama's so ugly
She had to get her baby drunk to breastfeed it!
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:35 PM
Response to Reply #15
16. Yo mama's so ugly

She has to put rawhide flavoring on her pussy so dogs will lick it.
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:48 PM
Response to Reply #16
34. Yo mama's so ugly
She made an onion cry
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:49 PM
Response to Reply #34
36. Yo mama's so ugly
Edited on Tue May-25-04 10:49 PM by TroubleMan
When she was a baby, they had to feed her with a slingshot.
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Archae Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:29 PM
Response to Original message
7. Yo mama's so fat...
She's a semi-mobile zip code. :-)
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:32 PM
Response to Reply #7
11. Yo mama's so ugly
When she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals."
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Archae Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:34 PM
Response to Reply #11
14. Yo mama's so dumb...
She married a Freeper! For money and sex! :evilgrin:
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:38 PM
Response to Reply #14
20. Yo mama's so dumb

She got a job climbing trees because she wanted to be a "Branch Manager."
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Archae Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:40 PM
Response to Reply #20
23. Yo mama's so ugly,...
She looks like Jim Robinson in drag! :-)
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:39 PM
Response to Reply #14
22. Yo mama's so fat
She broke her leg and gravy poured out
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:40 PM
Response to Reply #22
24. Your moma's so fat

When she goes to the movies, she sits next to everybody.
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:30 PM
Response to Original message
8. Yo mama's teeth are so messed up

It looks like her tongue's in jail!
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:33 PM
Response to Reply #8
12. Yo mama's so old
I told her to act her own age, and the bitch died.
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:34 PM
Response to Reply #12
13. Yo mama's so old

She's got an autographed version of The Bible.
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:37 PM
Response to Reply #13
19. Yo mama's so fat
She uses a mattress for a tampon.
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:38 PM
Response to Reply #19
21. Yo mama's so fat

Before God said "Let there be light," he told the bitch to move her fat ass out of the way!
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:42 PM
Response to Reply #21
27. Yo mama's so fat
The National Weather Agency has to assign names to her farts
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:44 PM
Response to Reply #27
28. Yo mama's so fat

You can't take her to the beach without little kids runnin' around her yelling:

"FREE WILLIE!! FREE WILLIE!!"
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:46 PM
Response to Reply #28
31. Yo mama's so old
Her birth certificate says "Expired" on it
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:47 PM
Response to Reply #31
32. Yo mama's so old

Her social security number is 0.
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:45 PM
Response to Original message
30. Yo mama's so stank
Edited on Tue May-25-04 10:46 PM by TroubleMan
When she walks by the bathroom, the toilet flushes.
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:49 PM
Response to Reply #30
37. Yo mama's so fat
She sat on a dollar and squeezed a booger out George Washington's nose
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:50 PM
Response to Reply #37
40. Yo mama's so fat

When she sings Rueben Studdard's "Sorry for 2004," she means sorry for 2004 lbs.
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Dookus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:47 PM
Response to Original message
33. Yo mama's
so skinny she gotta run around in the shower to get wet.
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:48 PM
Response to Reply #33
35. Yo mama's so bald

She stepped into the shower and got brainwashed.
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:53 PM
Response to Reply #35
44. Yo mama's so slutty
That I could've been your daddy, but the guy in line behind me had the correct change
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Blue-Jay Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:50 PM
Response to Original message
38. Yo mama's glasses are so thick...
When she looks at a map, she can see people waving.
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:57 PM
Response to Reply #38
51. Yo mama's glasses are so thick

They borrowed them for the Hubble telescope.
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CO Liberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:50 PM
Response to Original message
39. Yo Mama's So Stupid...
...she thinks Taco Bell is the phone company in Mexico.
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:52 PM
Response to Reply #39
43. Yo mama's so stupid

She went to a Rated R movie, and it said "Under 17 Not Admitted," so she left to go get 16 of her friends.
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Blue-Jay Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:51 PM
Response to Original message
41. Yo mama's so hairy...
Bigfoot takes pictures of HER.
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:51 PM
Response to Reply #41
42. You might not recognize yo mama the next time you see her

because I shaved her back last night.
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Blue-Jay Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:53 PM
Response to Reply #42
45. SNAP!
Yo mama's teeth are so yellow.....When she smiles, traffic slows down.
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:54 PM
Response to Reply #45
47. Yo mama's teeth are so yellow

When she spits it looks like mustard.
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:55 PM
Response to Reply #47
49. Yo mama's teeth are so yellow
She spits butter
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:54 PM
Response to Reply #42
48. Yo mama's like a bubble-gum machine...
Five cents a blow
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:59 PM
Response to Reply #48
54. Yo mama is so toothless

it takes her an hour to eat Minute Rice.
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 11:02 PM
Response to Reply #54
57. Yo mama's so nasty
That she pours salt water down her pants to keep her crabs fresh
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CO Liberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:56 PM
Response to Original message
50. Yo Mama's So Old, She Farts Dust
:-)
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:58 PM
Response to Reply #50
52. Yo mama's so slutty
She could suck-start a Harley
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 10:58 PM
Response to Original message
53. Yo mama's right leg is shorter than her left

And they call the bitch "Eileen"
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 11:00 PM
Response to Reply #53
55. Yo mama's so slutty
She was on the cover of Wheaties, with her legs open, and it said "Breakfast of the champions"
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 11:05 PM
Response to Reply #55
58. Yo mama is so ugly

When she was born, the doctor slapped everybody!
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dolo amber Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 11:05 PM
Response to Original message
59. Yo mama's so fat
Jenny Craig did a credit check! :D
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 11:06 PM
Response to Reply #59
61. Yo mama's so fat

when she stepped on the scale, it said:

"To be continued"
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 11:07 PM
Response to Reply #59
63. Yo mama's so old
When God said "Let their be light", the bitch flipped the switch
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 11:24 PM
Response to Reply #63
75. Yo mama's so old

She dyed herself black and started a group with Lot's Wife called "Salt n' Peppa."
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dolo amber Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 11:06 PM
Response to Original message
62. Yo mama's so ugly
her shadow quit.
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 11:07 PM
Response to Reply #62
64. If ugliness was bricks

Yo mama would have her own projects.
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 11:13 PM
Response to Reply #64
71. Yo mama's arms are so short
She has to tilt her head to scratch her ear
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 11:17 PM
Response to Reply #71
73. Yo mama got teeth all along her arms

and she chews her food by doing the Cabbage Patch.

(much better when you can act it out)
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 11:08 PM
Response to Reply #62
66. Yo mama's so ugly
The government moved Halloween to her birthday
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dolo amber Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 11:08 PM
Response to Original message
65. Yo mama's so old
she was a waitress at the Last Supper. :bounce:
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 11:09 PM
Response to Reply #65
68. Yo mama's so fat
she's on both sides of the family
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dolo amber Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 11:09 PM
Response to Original message
67. Yo mama's so fat
she wakes up in sections. :D
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 11:11 PM
Response to Reply #67
69. Yo mama's so ugly
They push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 11:15 PM
Response to Reply #69
72. Yo mama's so ugly

FDR said we have nothing to fear but yo mama's ugly grill!
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dolo amber Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 11:12 PM
Response to Reply #67
70. Yo mama's so old
she remembers when the Republican's symbol was the woolly mammoth! :o

Night folks, I'll be here all week..;):hi:
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 11:18 PM
Response to Reply #70
74. Yo mama's so fat and old

Noah used her as an anchor.
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MrScorpio Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed May-26-04 12:26 AM
Response to Reply #74
77. Yo mama's so fat
She has to put on her lipstick with a paint-roller
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TroubleMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 11:34 PM
Response to Original message
76. C'mon where you guys going?
Edited on Tue May-25-04 11:34 PM by TroubleMan
I can get to a 1000 posts on this thread alone. LOL.

BTW, the Rueben Studdard and Lot's wife jokes I just made up on the fly, so go ahead and use them, because I guess nobody should have ever heard them. Unless, someone thought of it before me. There's so many out there...who knows?
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