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Magrittes Pipe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:36 PM
Original message
I broke my tit.
I was trying to do something nice, all handyman-buildy-like, on Monday. I smashed a big metal pole into my right ribcage, and it hurt, but it went away and I didn't think much of it. Made it through yesterday, a little sore but no worse for wear.

Then last night I woke up from the pain. Been unable to move my right torso without it feeling like I'm being stabbed in the chest. This really sucks.
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:37 PM
Response to Original message
1. You shouldn't have posted anything in the body of the message.
That subject line was a perfect mind-bomb as is.
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Magrittes Pipe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:39 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. I broke your respiratory system.
I win.
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:40 PM
Response to Reply #2
4. Not so fast, Chauncey.
I broke three of your chakras....uh,"booyah." I guess.
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Magrittes Pipe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:41 PM
Response to Reply #4
7. I told you to lay off the zen voodoo, Koolzip.
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:43 PM
Response to Reply #7
9. Yer right, I'm sorry. Can you still lactate?
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Magrittes Pipe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:44 PM
Response to Reply #9
11. Only the milk of human violence.
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:45 PM
Response to Reply #11
13. I can dig. Me, I tore a ball recently.
GALLONS of Ben-Gay, homie!
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Magrittes Pipe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:48 PM
Response to Reply #13
16. Unfortunately, it was South of the Border Paul's ball...
...that you tore and then dumped gallons of Ben-Gay on.

Which probably explains why we haven't seen him recently.
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:52 PM
Response to Reply #16
20. No, the reason you haven't seen him recently is that your tit pain is
blinding. Hell, *I'*m feeling a bit of soreness in the nips right now.
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Magrittes Pipe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:55 PM
Response to Reply #20
24. You told me to bite harder.
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:58 PM
Response to Reply #24
28. That was a typo.
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patrice Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:39 PM
Response to Original message
3. Broken rib?
Sorry, I just happened to re-read "The Death of Ivan Ilyich" last night.
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Magrittes Pipe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:40 PM
Response to Reply #3
5. Likely not.
I thought I broke my ribs once (that was the most pain I've ever been in -- this takes second place). The HMO doctor looked at the X-ray and said "you no fracture -- you take Tylenol." I said "fuck you."

Okay, I didn't, but I wanted to.
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ChavezSpeakstheTruth Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:40 PM
Response to Original message
6. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
:cry: Oh shit that's funny!
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Magrittes Pipe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:42 PM
Response to Reply #6
8. Fuck you.
I wish Skinner would re-ban your ass. :P
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:44 PM
Response to Reply #8
12. Can it, you dicks! The Man WANTS us to fight!
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Magrittes Pipe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:46 PM
Response to Reply #12
15. Down with Whitey!
:grr:
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:50 PM
Response to Reply #15
19. I'm starting to harbor suspicions that you ARE indeed "Down with Whitey."
Or that could be a spelling mistake and I am suspicious that you are a big Whitey Houston fan and this whole broken tit thing is a ruse designed to skew our prying eyes away from your tape collection and onto your sunken, hairless chest.
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Magrittes Pipe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:54 PM
Response to Reply #19
22. You're down on Whitey.
And my chest is hardly hairless -- just the bits aside from my nipples.

Ah, my glorious tufted jewels.
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:56 PM
Response to Reply #22
26. You're so lucky.
I shave my areolas and then rouge them with dove's blood. Old family tradition.
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Magrittes Pipe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 09:00 PM
Response to Reply #26
29. Your family is fucked-up.
I hope you at least eat the dove.
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 09:04 PM
Response to Reply #29
32. No, I have the aging lead singer of an early-70's Heavy Metal band
do it for me: Eric Bloom of Blue Oyster Cult and John Garner of Sir Lord Baltimore are on the Koolzip Family payroll.
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Magrittes Pipe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 09:13 PM
Response to Reply #32
38. I think Buck Dharma may be my real dad.
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 09:16 PM
Response to Reply #38
40. Really? I'm related to Roger Glover of Deep Purple.....
....in that we both play bass badly.
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Magrittes Pipe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 09:17 PM
Response to Reply #40
41. Brother?
:o:cry::loveya:
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 09:22 PM
Response to Reply #41
42. Muh...MOM?!
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ChavezSpeakstheTruth Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:49 PM
Response to Reply #8
18. HA HA! Stop it - you're hurting my ribs!!
HAHAHAHA!!!!
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Magrittes Pipe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:55 PM
Response to Reply #18
23. If it didn't hurt to live, I would personally come to CT and kick your ass
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ChavezSpeakstheTruth Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:56 PM
Response to Reply #23
27. Oh great - now I peed myself!
Hee hee thanks alot ha HA HAHAHAHA!!!!

Asshole!
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Solon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:44 PM
Response to Original message
10. Could be inflamed cartilage...
Edited on Wed Jan-19-05 08:44 PM by Solon
I know, I had it on my Sternum thanks to being rear ended in a car accident. Seat belt saved my life, but left a hell of a mark on my chest. Had pressure on my heart and it hurt like hell the next day, took steroids for 2 weeks to bring down the swelling. Hope you feel better.
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Magrittes Pipe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:46 PM
Response to Reply #10
14. It's probably more the impact from the bone...
...on the underside of the pectoral. Yeah, I've probably got a bone bruise, but the worst of the pain feels muscular.
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Solon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:49 PM
Response to Reply #14
17. Yep, it sucks...
my entire chest wall was inflamed, could hardly breathe without cussing up a storm, it hurt so bad. Probably best to get it checked out regardless of whether or not it is really serious.
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Magrittes Pipe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:53 PM
Response to Reply #17
21. I will if I'm still feeling this bad tomorrow.
I can handle anything for a day (well, I should probably get any angina checked out, but bone/muscle stuff should be fine). But if it persists or (good God) worsens, I'll see the doc.
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Schema Thing Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 08:56 PM
Response to Original message
25. A good set of pec implants will keep this from ever happening again
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 09:00 PM
Response to Reply #25
30. Al's got silicon allergies, so implants are right out.
Apparently he's got no allergy to denim, though. Maybe you should stuff a pair of 501's between your ribcage and breast-skin, Al....?
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Magrittes Pipe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 09:04 PM
Response to Reply #30
33. Hello, moron. Saline.
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Magrittes Pipe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 09:02 PM
Response to Reply #25
31. Good idea.
I'll have to consider that. I could use a little lipo on my moobs, too.
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 09:06 PM
Response to Reply #31
35. "Moobs?!" You mean "Golden Bozos," right?
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Magrittes Pipe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 09:09 PM
Response to Reply #35
37. "Golden?!" You mean "Ashen and Pallid as to Death," right?
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 09:13 PM
Response to Reply #37
39. Are we still talking about the HedgeLumps?
I guess they'd be pretty pale.

"Turn off your high beams, Al! I'm goin' blind over here!"
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roguevalley Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 09:04 PM
Response to Original message
34. Have someone kiss it and make it better. :-D
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Magrittes Pipe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 09:07 PM
Response to Reply #34
36. Are you volunteering?
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SOteric Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-19-05 09:52 PM
Response to Original message
43. Thanks for sharing.
:hi:
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