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UrbScotty Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 09:39 AM
Original message
Your favorite Oxymorons!
Here's one to start:

Conservative Think Tank.

Think about it: Conservatives, and people who think. They're complete opposites!
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terrya Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 09:43 AM
Response to Original message
1. Mine, I'm saddened to say is "liberal media"
The big lie turned against us.
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Lady Freedom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 02:58 PM
Response to Reply #1
18. As a libreal and member of the media....
not fair!
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La_Serpiente Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 09:44 AM
Response to Original message
2. LOLOLOLOL
hmm...

it's cold as hell

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mrbill Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 09:47 AM
Response to Original message
3. military intelligence
n/t

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joeybee12 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 09:52 AM
Response to Reply #3
4. Yeah, military intelligence, especially now they've f**ked up big time!
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jmowreader Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 09:30 PM
Response to Reply #4
38. Excuse me?
Cycle of Intelligence, Clinton administration and before:

* The collectors collect.
* The analysts analyze.
* The reporters report.
* The agency sends it to the White House.
* The White House blows off half of it and uses the parts that further its agenda.

Cycle of Intelligence, Adolf Bush regime:

* The collectors collect, until Karl Rove blows their network in a fit of pique.
* The analysts analyze.
* The reporters report.
* The agency sends it to the White House.
* The White House reads the report, goes into shock and awe that it doesn't support their fantasies of world domination.
* Dick Cheney goes to the originating agency and promises to replace everyone who works there with Culinary Institute of America graduates if the agency won't get its shit together because if the people who currently serve America can't cook the intel the way Dubya likes it, he'll get some people who spent four years learning to cook.
* The analysts start making things up. The wilder the better.
* Bush goes before Congress with his wild-ass accusations and tells them if they don't sign off on his latest war jones, they're unpatriotic.

Cycle of Intelligence, as it should be:

* The analysts send up a report the White House doesn't like.
* Dick Cheney visits the CIA to tell them to start cooking the books.
* The CIA ties him upside down and flogs him with huge sticks before skinning him, then dropping him in a pot of boiling alcohol. They videotape the entire affair, then send the video to Mr. Bush with a warning to not try pulling this shit again.
* Bush does the patriotic thing and resigns on national television, then turns himself in to U.S. Marshals.
* After a roundup and kangaroo trial, Bush's life is spared and he's remanded to the nastiest slammer in the Federal Bureau of Prisons to begin serving 20-to-life as a cook in the mess hall. Karl Rove becomes a girlfriend to someone named Animal.
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ClintonTyree Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 10:10 AM
Response to Original message
5. Compassionate Conservative..............
'nuff said.
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salmonhorse Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 04:41 PM
Response to Reply #5
23. Whoop, there it is ~
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Bunny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 10:10 AM
Response to Original message
6. Jumbo Shrimp.
Terribly good. Military Intelligence. President George W.Bush (okay, that's not techincally an oxymoron, but you get my drift...)
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oxymoron Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 10:28 AM
Response to Original message
7. hmmm....let me think about it. n/t
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toddzilla Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 10:44 AM
Response to Reply #7
8. This one wins hands down...
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Cat Atomic Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 01:36 PM
Response to Reply #8
15. Oxy-Moron- LMAO
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pasadenaboy Donating Member (877 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 11:05 AM
Response to Original message
9. Rush Limbaugh
OXY-COTON MORON, or Oxymoron for short.
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Swede Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 11:10 AM
Response to Original message
10. vaguely aware
As in: 40% of the electorate is vaguely aware of what the fuck is going on.
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cosmicdot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 11:10 AM
Response to Original message
11. the George H.W. Bush Center For Central Intelligence
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BrotherBuzz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 01:20 PM
Response to Original message
12. Civil War
there ain't nothing civil about war...
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LeftPeopleFinishFirst Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 01:24 PM
Response to Original message
13. COMPASSIONATE CONSERVATIVE
:D

Wouldn't Toy Poodle be an oxymoron? I mean... just think about it.
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ProudGerman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 01:33 PM
Response to Original message
14. Christian Right
They are neither Christian, nor right.
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Cat Atomic Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 01:40 PM
Response to Original message
16. Anarchist Organizers
Ok, ok, I know the actual political ideas espoused by Anarchists have nothing to do with chaos or lawlessness. But it still makes me chuckle when I hear about Anarchists arriving at protests on chartered busses and such... it seems like the only way you should ever be able to get a crowd of Anarchists together is through sheer luck.
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salmonhorse Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 04:45 PM
Response to Reply #16
26. Also a goo't one ~
http://dadadot.org/fu.htm

"Case in point; Anarchists in Eugene, within recent memory, advertised the times & dates of their protest???????????? What? Is? Up? With? That?" ~ Giga-Zen-Dada
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OneBlueSky Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 01:45 PM
Response to Original message
17. President Bush . . . n/t
.
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retread Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 03:12 PM
Response to Original message
19. Heard this one from Rummy -- Humanitarian Bombs!!
*
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arwalden Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 04:33 PM
Response to Original message
20. Hot Water Heater?
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kayleybeth Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 04:37 PM
Response to Original message
21. Plastic Silverware n/t
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bubba_fett Donating Member (257 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 04:40 PM
Response to Original message
22. Microsoft Works! (nt)
.
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Touchdown Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 04:42 PM
Response to Original message
24. Friendly fire.
Also...Country music.:evilgrin:
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montana_hazeleyes Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 04:45 PM
Response to Original message
25. the little blue ones
sincerely,Rush-oh,you said oxymorons? Nevermind!
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Maccagirl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 07:21 PM
Response to Original message
27. Reagan Democrats
That one gets me steamed every time. RR stood for the polar opposite of all Democratic principles. If you voted for him-you were not a Democrat.
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Wolfman 11 Donating Member (444 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 07:22 PM
Response to Original message
28. President Bush
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SOteric Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 07:23 PM
Response to Original message
29. Government Organisation.
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SOteric Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 07:25 PM
Response to Original message
30. OOOoo! Oo! Peace Force.
I forgot that one.
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The Lone Liberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 07:41 PM
Response to Original message
31. Fox News Fair and Balanced.
Seems like an oxymoron (or oxymoran)
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Dogmudgeon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 07:57 PM
Response to Original message
32. Court of Law
--bkl
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Nlighten1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 08:24 PM
Response to Original message
33. Pretty ugly
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Darranar Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 08:29 PM
Response to Original message
34. humane war...
Microsoft works

Compassionate conservatism

Liberal media

Fascist liberals
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imax2268 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 08:30 PM
Response to Original message
35. just a few...!
acute dullness · act naturally · Advanced BASIC · airline food · almost exactly · alone together · Amtrak schedule · bittersweet · boring court jester · briefing · British fashion · business ethics · butthead · cafeteria food · calm wind · cardinal sin · casual sex · cheerleading scholarship · childproof · Christian Scientists · civil engineer · clean coal · coal mine safety · computer jock · computer security · clearly ambiguous · clearly confused · clearly misunderstood · comfortably dressed · conservative liberal · conciliation court · constant variable · constructive attitude · corporate conscience · cowardly lion · dangerously safe · deafening silence · definite maybe · deliberately thoughtless · democratic machine · designer jeans · diet ice cream · divorce court · domestic bliss · double solitaire · educational television · effective compassion · essential service · even odds · exact estimate · extensive briefing · extinct life · family vacation · fan fatale · federal budget · fish farm · flexible ethics · found missing · free love · freezer burn · french deodorant · fresh-frozen · friendly fire · friendly takeover · funky white guy · genuine imitation · genuine imitation naughahide · good grief · good shit · government organization · guest host · healthy chocolate · hells angels · holy war · half naked · home office · humanitarian invasion · idiot savant · ill health · industrial park · instant classic · intense apathy · jumbo shrimp · justice rehnquist · larger half · least favorite · legally drunk · light rock · linear curve · liquid gas · lite beer · little giants · living dead · long sleeved t-shirt · loud librarian · managed competition · marital bliss · Microsoft Works · mild interest · mild mannered reporter · military intelligence · minor crisis · minor miracle · misanthropic humanitarian · modern history · moral majority · natural blonde · new classic · New York culture · non-alcoholic beer · non-alcoholic wine · non-dairy creamer · non-working mother · normal deviation · obscene art · old news · only choice · on-time airplane · on-time musical production · on-time train · open secret · original copies · original reprint · oxymoron · paid volunteer · passive aggression · peace offensive · peacekeeper missile · plastic glasses · plastic silverware · player coach · player piano · polite salesman · political science · post feminist · postal service · pretty ugly · private citizen · qualified success · randomly organized · rap music · Reagan Democrat · real potential · religious tolerance · republican party · resident alien · rock opera · rolling stop · rush hour · sad clown · safe sex · sanitary landfill · sanitary sewer · same difference · scheduled spontaneity · scientific belief · second best · sensitive guy · serious musician · seriously funny · silent scream · simply superb · small crowd · socialist market economy · soft rock · software documentation · standard deviation · straight angle · student athlete · study outside · successful suicide · sweet sorrow · sweet tart · synthetic natural gas · Tame cat · taped live · temporary tax increase · terribly enjoyable · terribly pleased · tight slacks · tragic comedy · train schedule · trial separation · turbo diesel · twelve-ounce pound cake · unbiased opinion · uncrowned king · unhappily married · united nations · unsellable stock · unsung hero · vaguely aware · virtual reality · war games · wholesome · working vacation
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Dogmudgeon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 08:33 PM
Response to Reply #35
36. URL, please!
--bkl
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imax2268 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Oct-26-03 08:35 PM
Response to Reply #36
37. where I got that...?
is that what you are asking for...?
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