the squid stole zuni's crack pipe out of his top dresser drawer!!!!

ok, let me catch my breath... i've been up all night worried sick... haven't gotten an hour's sleep...

it all started yesterday...

zuni & i went to the hospital to pick up our still unnamed* adopted squid... it was all happy... we went to baskin robbins & got rocky road ice cream... the squid still isn't strong enough to hold a waffle cone, so we got it in a cup... ok, anyway...

so we got home... it was getting late, so i sat down with the baby squid and had a long talk about drugs & peer pressure over a soothing cup of jasmine tea...

so we all went to bed & everything was fine...

then... in the middle of the night... i heard the squealing of car tires & the smell of burning rubber... i looked in the driveway & the el camino was missing... then i went to the squid's bedroom & found a note: "i hate you i'm running away" :cry:

zuni was so upset that he reached for his crack pipe in the dresser drawer (to calm down)... only to find it missing :cry:

i've heard of squids rebelling, but i did everything i could :cry:

i'm a wreck. please. if you see THIS car or THIS squid, please contact me...

a 'squid alert'.

:cry:

:hug:

they should have told you. WTF? :wtf:

young squids need guidance.

we have gotten together with the other neighbors and have decided to DEMAND you not let that squid back in the house!

this used to be such a safe place. hell, we never used to have to lock our doors before you brought HIM home. now none of us feel safe. if you let that squid back in, we have decided to not invite you to our next street social!

we have to put our foot down on this one.

i have the milk industry on my side

sundog needs our help, not our contempt.








Although I did vote to keep the squid out as well. He was stinking up my yard.

i knew i could count on your support :cry:

if i see him around here, i'm calling the squid-catcher

you.have.been.warned.

:cry:

old enough to do the time. Don't worry, he'll probably just go to juvie-hall, er, juvie aquarium.

But it's time to seek professional help.

:cry:

you know how he hates tight fitting clothes :cry:

your car:


your pet:










I'm probably gonna get in trouble. I nominated this thread!

nominated? :rofl:

Enough to share - it does look like a pretty small thing after all?

Boonies, Rural: (DU:LBN) The burned out remains of a very tricked
out late '60s El Camino were found near a water slide amusement
center.

A Law-Enforcement Officer at the scene is quoted as saying,
"Golly, from the damage to the vehicle the perpetrators are
either 4 people or one squid. It would take at least 8 arms
to do that kind of thing. It was horrible. Ohh, the humanity."

:cry:

But, if squid AKA squiddy AKA squidworth AKA squidmeister
AKA The Squid AKA Watch-those-hands-buster is to be brought
back to his senses.

He (it?) must be tracked and apprehended.

did the car leave any squid marks?

Is it possible that Zuni kidnapped the squid and brought him back east?????

Just sayin'.

we both thought the crack pipe would calm us down when we found it missing...

he's been driving around the country all night searching & i've been waiting by the phone :cry:

I have been miserable all night, thinking only of the squid

there, there, sundog *you're OK*

:cry:

we did everything for that squid :cry:

think about this > and this ...> sundog

:loveya:

I don't even know what to say. I hardly got any sleep last night.

The State Police have a description of the El Camino and the Squid, but I just got off the phone with them and still no sign of the squid.

Sundog took that little squid under his wing....and that squid dumped us like a sack of potatoes, and yet, right now all I want to know is if the squid is ok

:(

i need to calm down :cry:

and a whole shitload of primo product. Enough so we will be able to drive around for several days on our squid hunt

I say we take the Cadillac

:cry: that makes me so happy :cry:

almost makes me forget about the squid... but not quite :cry:

:(

what's your point? :P

guess someone isn't TOO broken up about a missing Cephalopod

:7

You were just crap at raising it - face facts, it's all you're fault. :P

Edit - typo.

there was always crack in my childhood home & i turned out fine :freak:

:P

It's just the tough love that you need. Now don't adopt any more children/animals until you're a far better person - and certainly don't go and get yourself pregnant either.

Kids go bad, especially dead squids. This isn't your fault. It was probably programmed into his DNA.

There are plenty of deceased squid that leave perfectly respectable lives

you would :nuke:

with some help from matcom. We just erased her from our collective memories.

And, her room makes a great TV room.


It was a little hard, for a day or two. But we moved on.

:cry:

Good for you.

all we need to get for it now are a pair of cattle horns for the front and a chrome skull hood ornament and vanity license plates that say SQUID1

:cry:

:cry:

:cry:

:grouphug:

:grouphug:

I called the aquarium and they told me the whole story... they only had him in the tank to protect him from his daddy the pimp.

He was born addicted -- it's not his fault!!!! :cry:

edited cause i cannot spell in my grief

You know squids learn best by example...

:shrug:

but it turned out to be a different squid altogether

You are all in my thoughts and prayers.

:grouphug:

:hug:

:loveya:

thank you

:grouphug:

I found this photo. I hope there isn't some Cruella Deville measuring him for curtains.... or horrible shoes!!

I can't stop laughing - I'm hooked now - this could be a spin-off of "Trailer Park Boys"........

and this happens.....

un. freakin'. believable.

:shrug:

to avoid getting sent to Iraq ??? They need all the help they can get over there....