Terrorist Has No Idea What To Do With All This Plutonium

gristy

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Sat Dec-03-05 09:19 PM
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Terrorist Has No Idea What To Do With All This Plutonium

November 30, 2005 | Issue 41�48

ZAHEDAN, IRAN�Yaquub Akhtar, the leader of an eight-man cell linked to a terrorist organization known as the Army Of Martyrs, admitted Tuesday that he "doesn't have the slightest clue" what to do with the quarter-kilogram of plutonium he recently acquired.

Yaquub Akhtar.

"We had just given thanks to Allah for this glorious means to destroy the Great Satan once and for all, when Mahmoud asked, 'So, what's the next step?'" Akhtar said. "I was at a loss."

The 28-year-old fanatic said he and his associates had initially assumed that at least one member of their group had the physics and engineering background necessary to construct a thermonuclear device.

"Many eyes were upon me," said Basim Aljawad, whose knowledge of physics did not extend to the principles of nuclear fission. "I make nail bombs. That's it."

more: http://www.theonion.com/content/node/43012

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Archae

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Sat Dec-03-05 11:08 PM
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1. I can use it in this car...

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