does anyone else find grandiose syrupy expressions of emotion

for people they've never actually personally known somewhat disconcerting (sickening)?

you know what i mean:

"tears/laughter of angels" kind of stuff.

i can feel for a person's death, but i find it hard to come up with saccharine glurge or extreme sadness for someone i never personally knew.

... melodrama in the movies or treacly sentiment on TV leaves me cold.

On the other hand, done right it can wreck me :)

yes. those are the words are was looking for.

The point is to express your sorrow for the person who is living and going through hell. We all try to come up with the right words and damn it's hard. I guess unless someone never felt the pain of loss it is hard to tell someone how sorry you are. We all try to remember what helped us through those difficult times. I'll accept whatever support some compassionate soul can come up with, it's all they could give me and I'd appreciate it and be grateful personally.

"i'm sorry for your loss"?

i dunno, i guess i'm not very touch feely.

the whole stiff upper lip thing i guess.

some of us are emotionl "wrecks" and can nearly feel others pain, it's that real. So there is nothing wrong with you or them just a different way of expressing your sorrow. As long as someone means well I don't care how it comes out personally. I can see how it might be a problem for some people though.:-)

I'm a genealogist.

I love digging up all the information I can on my family members, finding photos from various sources, and stories, and other goodies.

The more I find out about some of these people, the more I'm sad I never got to know them.

I feel the same for others, when helping them try to find info on their families. There have been some crummy people who've lived too, but pretty much everyone was loved by someone. I always keep that in mind when I'm researching.

fsc

I went to Kenyon, which has a VERY steep and LONG hill leading to a major road where people are going 50-60. In the second week of freshman year, someone I do not know started his bike down the hill, and his brakes were not good enough stop after he had no doubt built up quite some speed, and he was hit by a car and killed:scared: .

All of the girls were mortified when I did not want to go (and did not go) to the funeral; I had never met the guy. I go to funerals of people I know; being forced to go to strangers funerals (which has happened, once that I can recall) leaves me feeling uncomfortable.

It could have been worse; they could have know my true thoughts on his actions, to wit: I thought he was an idiot, worthy of a Darwin Award. I mean, if you know you are not going to be able to brake on a steep, long hill, then you should not be careening carelessly down it into oncoming traffic:eyes: . An eighteen year old should have had more sense; though my college was not known for attracting people with sense (noting that I went there - :rofl: ).

but I can appreciate the loss for words that many have...especially when "I'm sorry for your loss" and "If there's anything I can do..." start to sound like a broken record.

Sometimes a hug is the best way to express those sympathies. And othertimes people manage to find words that sound sympathetic without sounding stale or saccharine.

I've got enough on my plate with my own reactions. :shrug: