If you had a half-sibling you never met

but you weren't sure if he knew about you, would you write him if you knew his address? My father and mother weren't ever married, and I had no contact with him after about the age of 2. He had a son who is about 5 years younger than me. My mother and our father are both gone, and I know my brother's name and possible address. I figure, at the very least, he would ignore me, or tell me to piss off.

Thoughts?

Mailing a card would be a good start. Maybe a response from him will tell you whether or not you need to be careful what you wish for, or will turn out to be a relationship that lasts a lifetime.

You never know until you try :thumbsup:

If you feel you need to get it out of your system, go ahead. What ifs are horrible.

The problem though, is that you may find yourself waiting, or being more upset than you expect if in fact he does tell you to piss off.

Good luck.

Right now I'm more curious than anything, and haven't formed an emotional attachment. But I can see where you're coming from with that.

They both know that and they also know they have half brothers and sisters.

Our son has visited his birth mother who denies other children, but I know she is without the truth.

Our daughter has no interest at all in siblings or her birth mother.

I wish they could connect one day. But that is their choice.

My feeling is-go for it.

180

As long as you are at peace with the fact that he may completely ignore you, then I say drop him a short letter with your contact information. I'm an only child, and I think it would be wonderful to find out I had a sibling.

I have a brother I've never met. Probably doesn't know I exist. If I knew his last name or his address, I'd be all over that. I have nieces and nephews I've never even met.
Duckie

She was adopted out when she was six months old in 1951. She has five full siblings and six half-sibs -- who all (at least the ones I've met so far) seem to be A-OK types. Interestingly enough, they all haven't fallen all over one other -- but she is getting to know them gradually and they're doing the same with her. I guess after 54 years as an adoptee, there would be a bit of a distance (though not as much as you might think -- three of said sibs lived within four blocks of her while they were growing up, and they all went to the same junior high and high school).
Anyhow, long story short -- it's been a positive experience for Polly and she recommends you go for it.
John
We wish you well whatever you choose to do.

What have you got to lose? There's been some half-siblings in my family finding each other for the first time. The experience was great.

Long story

And if I had their addresses, yes I would write to them. Our mutual parent is dead, and we're semi-siblings.

He was older and on his own when I was growing up. We got together a few years ago. I'm glad we never got close before. What an obnoxious opinionated asshole. We never got around to politics, but I'm sure he must be a rethug. I guess it's probably good that we got together, else I might have felt guilty for not knowing him better.