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skygazer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Mar-12-06 05:26 PM
Original message
Yet another dead friend
Crap. It's ridiculous how many dead people I know - when I go home to visit, I have a cemetery ritual that takes me through several cemeteries, past many, many graves and takes me two days to complete. It's absurd - they started dying when I was 15 (kid from school - car accident) and have not stopped yet, 30 years later. Drug overdoses, car accidents, murders, suicides, you name it. Is it me? Am I dangerous to be friends with? Or is it the place because all of them are from back in Vermont - I have yet to kill any of my California friends with my very presence.

This guy was 43, nicest guy in the world, had a nice wife, some nice kids, a nice job, lots of friends. I've known him since I was about 8 years old - hell, I even took his virginity when he was all of 17. Killed in a freak, stupid car accident - no alcohol or drugs, just a stupid freak accident.

Another fucking stop on the cemetery tour. Man, I am depressed. :cry:
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havocmom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Mar-12-06 05:41 PM
Response to Original message
1. It's not you. Shit happens
Sorry about the burdens of your grief. It can be tempting to start internalizing it, but don't. It just happens.

Take extra care with what you are doing. Give yourself plenty of time to get places and such. We can have more accidents when we are under a lot of stress or distracted. Be as good to yourself as you would be to your best friends, especially now.

Think of it this way, you have friends in high places looking out for you. the love doesn't end when the vessel breaks

Take care.

hm

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WritingIsMyReligion Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Mar-12-06 05:43 PM
Response to Original message
2. Life ends.
Unfortunately.

x(

I don't mean to sound callous at all, and I hope you didn't just take this as such.

:hug:
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skygazer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Mar-12-06 05:49 PM
Response to Reply #2
6. Believe me, I don't
I know about that all too well. Quite honestly, I barely raise an eyebrown about it anymore (which kind of bothers me) - I just kind of shrug and mark another mental checkmark on the mental chalkboard.

I don't even know why I posted this - I guess because writing it down makes it concrete. But also because there are few people I know who know as many people who've died as I do - I mean close personal friends. I don't really feel like a jinx (most of the time) but it does make you scratch your head and say :wtf:

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NJCher Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Mar-12-06 05:43 PM
Response to Original message
3. get an astrological delineation done
Prob'ly some aspect.

You can transmute that.




Cher
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EstimatedProphet Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Mar-12-06 05:44 PM
Response to Original message
4. Wow. I'm sorry.
That must build up on you. I'm fortunate in that I haven't had many friends or acquaintances die.
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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Mar-12-06 05:47 PM
Response to Original message
5. All that really means, is that you've been rich with friends.
The more people you care about, the more people you will know that die/are dead, until your time comes. You're not dangerous, you're well liked.

Sorry if that sounded morbid.
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skygazer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Mar-12-06 05:51 PM
Response to Reply #5
7. No, it didn't. In fact, I like it
And I can see the truth in it. Thanks - that puts it in a whole new perspective. :hi:
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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Mar-12-06 05:56 PM
Response to Reply #7
8. Very good.
I'm glad I showed up today, then.
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graywarrior Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Mar-12-06 06:21 PM
Response to Original message
9. Sucks, doesn't it?
Can only say I'm sorry. Freaks me out when someone I know dies, and it's happening a lot lately.
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salin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Mar-12-06 06:24 PM
Response to Original message
10. So very, very sorry.
Condolences to all whose lives were touched by your friend.
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catmandu57 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Mar-12-06 07:51 PM
Response to Original message
11. Another Mohican
I would have sworn I was the last of the mohicans, I'm in the same boat, all of my old friends are gone, for the same reasons.
Car wrecks, od's, disease, murder, christ you name it. Last week I pick up the paper turn to the obits and there was my first friend from grade school, cancer.
I feel like a surviver, the last surviver, sometimes it gets lonely when none of the old friends can talk back anymore. I'm sorry for your loss.
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maveric Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Mar-12-06 08:07 PM
Response to Original message
12. In high school there were 30 of us that were close. Only 5 are still alive
They went the way of drugs, alcohol, AIDS, murder, suicide, motor vehicle accidents, killed by police and untimely illnesses. My brother is one of those casualties, dying of a heroin overdose in 1996.
We were "The Lost generation". baby boomers born between 1950-1961.
When I go back east I visit the cemetary and am deeply saddened by all those struck down in their primes.
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