I am feeling very down right now ...

Everytime I try to get something on my own I am always turned down . I have been trying to get a car and I have enough for a downpayment. But all I need is a co-signer and I don't have one. My credit union is willing to give me a car loan but all I need is a co-signer . I am so tired of being stuck in this stupid house. I have no one to talk to or to turn to . I am so tired of being stuck in this house - I don't have any money. I have no one to talk to . All my so called mom does is yell at me. I am tired of being the one everyone talks crap to. All I do is go to work . I never eat at home . I eat at work. And I wanted a car so that I can move out as quickly as possible. I am holding on to all of my money but I need to buy my medicine - I am so tired of being stuck in this house. I just want to leave. My mom is a bitch - everytime something happens and she knows that I am down she just puts me down . I should have just stayed in Germany. She is the type of person who gets energy from negativity. When something or low happens I keep to myself and just try to say everything will work out but she comes and says " I told you so " - its why I have depression now . I feel like totally disappearing out my existence because I just want to be free from this ... someone please pray for me .

:hug::hug:


sending good vibes to your doorstep...just reach right down and pick them up!!!


I will remember you in my prayers.

because there are people with much bigger problems than mine . Mine is material compared to those in the hospital sick or those who need food ... I should be more humble.

Everyone has a bad day and I am having mine.

:hug: Believe it or not, things WILL get better. Do you have another relative or good friend that would be willing to cosign your loan?

Negative people can be awfully hard to take. I'm sorry it's been bad. :hug:

And this was the same person who I let borrow $150 about 3 weeks ago to pay their mortgage even though I only had about $500 in my account at that time . I just need a co-signer I can afford the payments.

I've been in that situation for years and hate it.
Its bad enough having the problems but when you have no one to talk to about it, its exponentially worse.
You've got a friend and a sounding board if you need one.

from the time I was a kid I remember being turned down when I was 9 years old at the music store because we did'nt have a credit card to rent a violin. I was so heartbroken . So I ended up having to play a school owned viola instead and it turned out alright . Same thing when I played the clarinet , I got my first one from the pawn shop and I ended up being the best clarinet player there was - I guess something good comes out something sometimes but right now , I am just tired of having to rely on other peopel to get to work or just ANYWHERE .

I said a little prayer for you.

I wish you were local. I could easily co-sign for you, if I got a spare set of keys.

Try to be patient. Try to relax.

You have a place to live, probably running hot water and a job and are fairly healthy. So you are not doing too bad. And you have friends here.

You need more music maybe. Get yourself a drum, and bang on it like it was your momma's head.

Also, you might need to change your sig line :hide:

The car was right there waiting for me . Its just that I don't have any credit . Argh.

sooner or later?

:hug:

but if I do come back to Germany it will be a permanent stay.

as opposed to from something...

Otherwise can you skip the car and get a place near public transportation?

Now would not be a good time, because it'd be too easy for your emotions to get the best of the conversation. But maybe she doesn't realize how negative she is. Maybe she's as unhappy as you are right now. Perhaps you'd feel better if you could help her step outside her grumpy exterior and go have some fun.

Take a deep breath and hang in there, sweetie. Don't let your anger rankle, and make things more depressing for you. Remember that even though we can't see you, we love and care about you here. :hug::hug::hug:

:hug:

Having someone who gets energy from negativity, boy oh boy do I ever know where you're coming from only mine's not my parents....(To the moon Alice, to the moon!) but to get on your case like that!? She needs some serious counseling. Are you from Germany? (My dad was there in WWII and wanted to go back for a visit because he said it was very beautiful.) It may not be much advice, but sometimes when I'm blue I'll pop in a Charlie Chaplin silent movie and my tears are from laughing. Sure does help a bit. Prayers and hugs coming your way.

I am just an eccentric 25 year old black girl who always dreamed outside of the box. Not saying that I think I am better than other people , I like to do the unexpected. I lived there for 3 1/2 years and in the area where I lived sometimes areas had to be evacuated because bombs from WWII were found and had to be detonated . I also lived near a German airforce base - it was cool seeing the fighter jets do their manuveurs during the time I lived there. I did'nt go to Germany for military service I only went because I needed an escape . It would be so easy for me to escape but I need to make my own base here in America.

Now I live in California. I go back to visit here and there but never enough.

you believe you need her right now. That's coming from a mom, me. One way you might avoid her condemnation/criticism is not letting on how you're struggling with things. Although that may seem heartless or even foolish, you've said yourself that she feeds off your misery. So you aren't gaining anything by confiding in her and may in fact be losing her respect. And, in turn, your own for yourself.

Just a mother's perspective.