So, a drunk SUV-driving bar trollop called on me at 2 am

I had been in bed reading, and had turned out the reading light and gone to bed and was just saying my nightly prayer when the doorbell rang.

I thought, "What the fuck? Who the fuck?!"

So I ignored it, but it came again. More ignoring. Then thenderous knocking.

So, I went to the living room window and peeked through the blinds and saw a big SUV in the driveway. I thought, "Cops? Secret Police? Is this my krystalnacht?"

Then the doorbell went off repeatedly, with gusto. So I looked out the blinds in the door window and see a youngish woman standing there with cigarette in one hand and drink a cheap, tawdry plastic cup in the other. No doubt she'd been at some upscale skank bar where the drinks are all poured into cheap plastic and the cocktails are lush with oversugared shit and sstingy on the cheap Mr. Boston's versions of the essential liquor, served to people who can't tell the difference because they couldn't find their way out of a WalMart without buying some cutesy and plastic piece of schlock that will soon break because its cheaply and shittily made, just like their life.

So I finally answer the door, and the chicky poo goes off rambling on something incoherent, no doubt learned while she was working afternoons on her co-op vocational placement while in high school, or perhaps learned from the drunken middle-aged men she serves at her evening job waiting tables at the local poured concrete eatery where grease and cigarette smoke finely coat everything the way that the cheap polyester waitress uniforms don't.

So she rambled a bit more, then I said, "I'm sorry, I can help you with something?"

And she said, "I'm looking for (guy's name)". I said, "No (guy's name) here."

She said, "Oh, I'm sorry to wake you up."

I said, "No problem" and shut the door.

Then she walked around, ringing and knocking on some of the neighbor's doors, and about five minutes later she drove off.

:wtf:

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and I don't shop at Walmart. Puh-lease!

A knock on the door at 1:00 am when I was still up watching the tube. :wtf:

I opened the door and a women said her husband was after her with a gun, "please let me in! " So not wanting her to get shot I let her in and shut the apartment lights off. As soon as the lights were off I peeked through my now closed blinds to see a guy walking around the parking lot with a big f'n gun in his hand! :wtf:again! While he's re-conning the lot I asked the woman what happened. She said she was "just" bringing his clothes over to his apartment (since he just moved out of their house), let herself in (quietly) with a key and caught her soon to be ex-husband doing the big nasty with the new much younger girlfriend.

So ahole that I am, I had just got my dumb ass in the middle of a marital war that includes a guy with a gun about 50 feet away....and looking......and a vengeful wife with no gun but just a can of mace! :hide:

When I called 911 Baton Rouge police and explained that a guy was in the lot below my window with a gun in his hand and out in the open looking for his wife who was now cowering behind me, the cop said there is nothing they can do because owning a gun is legal in Louisiana. :grr: The cop said call back if he fires the gun off outdoors,:eyes: then they can come on a "disturbing the peace" call for making noise in a densely populated neighborhood. :wow:

The moral or this story is; If you live in LA, have a gun in the house to equal the odds.

Or, is that censored? :hi:

convinced she was gone. She left about a half hour later to go home. I never heard more about that couple again.

Because if he did, then they by law should have come.

Maybe you should have said that he was threatening a box of Krispy Kremes?

after having just got caught in an embarrassing position. He was major pissed. The law didn't care about the threat, they said they can only do something if he acts on the threat. I was baffled by that cop response, so I kept my head down and helped her escape unseen off the property and assume she survived since I saw no photo of her in the newspaper as a murder victim. The gun situation was very very loose in LA in the early '80s, everyone seemed t have one.

I've lived here most of my life. For a time, I was living in an area of town that was bordered by some rough neighborhoods and I had to call the police maybe half a dozen times. Maybe half of those times, I had to exaggerate the situation before they'd even consider coming out. It's much better now, though. The new police chief has really cracked down on the inept and/or lazy officers.

I lived in an apartment complex on Longridge off of S. Sherwood Forest Blvd. It was a neat spot. A bunch of us Yanks were in BR while building the River Bend I nuke, learning about the great cajun eats, and had our mind blown that we could LEGALLY drink and drive in LA.

As for the drinking and driving... It's not as rampant anymore. There are still a few drive through liquor stores and daquiri shops in the more rural areas, but not in the city.

And then something bad could have happened.

"something for the effort" :D

Had she maced him when she caught him screwing or something?

I never thought this would happen to me but.....

:bounce:

soaking their white t-shirts.

private schoolgirl uniforms

covered in mud, with no spare clothes, in need of my washing machine...

and never into their glasses, while we all laughed and smiled.

:rofl:

Told her (INSERT NAME) ran off with some chick, then consoled her.

"Oh, yeah, (NAME) was here with Vicki, crying to her about he doesn't love some woman any more because of the pain she causes and her, in his words, 'constant and infernal bitchiness' and 'her fat ass' and 'fucking dumb hairstyle that looks like it came from Fantastic Sams or some leftover 1980s powder blue wedding', then she consoled him with a BJ and now they just popped out to Walgreens to get some condoms and then they're going to her place."

That all that talk of Gay Marriage just sent him right over the edge....

I wouldn't have! :shrug:

:ponder:


Also, if it's an "upscale" bar, it doesn't serve its drinks "poured into cheap plastic and the cocktails are lush with oversugared shit and sstingy on the cheap Mr. Boston's versions of the essential liquor."

:double ponder:


I think it's dumb that the lady decided to drive afterward, but I strongly defend her getting plowed at 2 a.m. Nuttin' wrong with that. :thumbsup:

As to tawdry, I really don't know if a cup can be tawdry.

You just have her nailed, don't you; you know that she buys tawdry shit at WalMart and drinks cheap liquor because, I assume, she's not a boho or a hair-shirt wearing progressive? You know that her whole life is crappy and meaningless? Just from a few class signals in her clothing and manner? Such resentment.

Judgmental much?

read above. he DIDN'T nail her!

the wussie x(

Two people, alone, different, people who might not have looked at each other in different circumstances, a chance to bridge the gap and find human contact and connection in an unexpected and unscripted sexual encounter, a chance to find common ground and shared joy in a chance encounter.

Next time a drunk girl looking for a booty call turns up on your doorstep, just ask yourself, "how long will I be dead."

all I'll add is I've never regretted the times its happened to me, even when I somehow get lured to the Dollar Store to buy her some god-awful pair of $15 pink pants.

he enjoys the rationalizing (and the talking) more than the DOING. So hes ends up rationalizing stuff he didn't, y'know, DO

Oh, the irony.

:eyes:

But you do have an interesting life, Mr. Rabrrrrrrr.

eom

she might have been an answer. I'm just sayin'.

:rofl: I'm nominating this one!

Drat dabnabbit.

But, I have a sweetie pie already, and don't need another one. Especially not the kind that get drunk then knock on people's doors at random at 2 am.

But you could be right - the Spirit moves in such mysterious ways, maybe this was God saying, "No, not your current sweetie, but this one - this one is the one I picked for you, you blind idjit."

Don't quit your day job!

Redstone