I drove my stolen Bentley to the Olive Garden

KitchenWitch

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Wed Jun-21-06 03:17 AM
Original message

I drove my stolen Bentley to the Olive Garden

and chainsmoked while I breast fed my eight year old. My six and four year olds ran around the restaurant talking loudly on their cellphones and playing with my stun gun (which I purchased at Walmart). They stun gunned the waitress, who died on the spot, after, of course, delivering our veal order to the table. She forgot our cornflake crusted chicken.

Kirstie Alley and Tom Cruise were at the next table discussing Scientology, and I told them to give me some literature, since I was considering converting.

Our new waitress was more than happy to accept my "Hillary '08" literature as a tip.

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Nicole

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Wed Jun-21-06 03:26 AM
Response to Original message

1. Yeah but did you

order any white trash food as appetizers? Did you bother to poll the staff?

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Oeditpus Rex

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Wed Jun-21-06 03:26 AM
Response to Original message

2. No kudzu?

:shrug:

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Radio_Lady

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Wed Jun-21-06 03:31 AM
Response to Reply #2

3. Did you sneeze? If so, kudzu to you, too -- and God bless!

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Oeditpus Rex

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Wed Jun-21-06 03:37 AM
Response to Reply #3

7. I've been sneezin' for a month

Same reason Klinger had for wearing an Easter hat in formation.

"It's spring, sir!"

:silly:

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Guy Fawkes

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Wed Jun-21-06 03:33 AM
Response to Original message

4. Wait, what's wrong with cornflakes?

You dissin' Cornelius? My man the rooster!

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Radio_Lady

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Wed Jun-21-06 03:44 AM
Response to Reply #4

12. What's wrong with cornflakes? I'll tell you what's wrong with cornflakes!

It's flakes like you that use them for batter, that's what! :sarcasm:

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Richard Steele

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Wed Jun-21-06 03:35 AM
Response to Original message

5. You STOLE a Bentley?

Even factory-authorized Bentley-experts can't keep
that backAsswards electrical system functioning for more
than a week at a time...
And you HOTWIRED one?

You, madam, are a GODDESS amongst car theives!

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KitchenWitch

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Wed Jun-21-06 03:36 AM
Response to Reply #5

6. *snicker*

:rofl:

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billyskank

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Wed Jun-21-06 03:39 AM
Response to Original message

8. BRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEY

BRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEYBRITNEY

:p

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KitchenWitch

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Wed Jun-21-06 03:41 AM
Response to Reply #8

9. Oh fuck, I forgot Britney!

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billyskank

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Wed Jun-21-06 03:41 AM
Response to Reply #9

10. ...

:spank:

:D

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Richard Steele

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Wed Jun-21-06 03:42 AM
Response to Reply #8

11. Britney can get BENTLY! nm

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DU AdBot (1000+ posts)

Wed May 15th 2024, 07:37 PM
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