Update on 'celebrating' deceased cousin's birthday.

trof

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Sat Dec-02-06 12:17 PM
Original message

Update on 'celebrating' deceased cousin's birthday.

Here's the original thread:
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=105&topic_id=5895934&mesg_id=5895934

I talked to the hostess just now.
Turns out the idea to put the dead daughter's name on the dad's birthday cake too (both born on Dec. 7) was strictly hers. She got it from a Dear Abby column.
:eyes:

She hadn't consulted the dad nor the daughter's husband or kids.
After we talked, and she talked it over with another family member, 'we' decided not the thing to do. We'll memorialize Jennifer in some other way.

She really meant well, and appreciated my concern, too.
And everybody's happy now, and looking forward to the gathering.
:-)
Many thanks for all your input.
trof.

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Gormy Cuss

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Sat Dec-02-06 01:02 PM
Response to Original message

1. That sounds like a good outcome. n/t

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Kerrytravelers

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Sat Dec-02-06 01:08 PM
Response to Original message

2. Glad it worked out.

The tribute may now be enjoyed by all without the awkwardness of a birthday cake that wasn't requested by the family.

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mzteris

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Sat Dec-02-06 01:32 PM
Response to Original message

3. glad it worked out ok -

I experienced a "similar" disturbing incident.

The funeral for a relative (by marriage) was also the day of his little brother's birthday (about 10 yo I think). First off, I would have changed the date of the funeral if it were me. But the if that fact alone weren't bad enough - at the after-funeral luncheon - they brought out a birthday cake and sang Happy Birthday and gave him his presents.

Weird. Very very weird. The poor kid will probably be scarred for life.

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Kali

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Sat Dec-02-06 03:04 PM
Response to Reply #3

6. ...

:wow:

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hippywife

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Sat Dec-02-06 02:31 PM
Response to Original message

4. How about not putting any names

on the cake? Just "Happy Birthday" and then anyone who wants to can feel like it implies them both and those who don't are none the wiser or freaked out about it.

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crispini

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Sat Dec-02-06 02:37 PM
Response to Original message

5. Well, that's original, at least.

Well handled! :thumbsup:

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