Men's Health Magazine via Yahoo: 4 reasons why men cheat

Please note: Copying and pasting of this article implies neither agreement nor endorsement of cheating, for any reason. I found it on the Web, I thought it might be of interest. Period. I believe that there is no valid reason for cheating by men or women. It's low behavior, it's chickenshit, it's cowardly, it's reprehensible, it's not fair to the man or woman who gave you their most precious gift...their heart.

:toast:

Why Men Cheat
Posted by David Zinczenko

http://health.yahoo.com/experts/menlovesex/2/why-men-cheat

1). To Fulfill His Biology: You know the old anthropological tale. A man's main job, besides killing the saber-tooth, is to spread his seed in order to ensure the survival of his genetic legacy. It's a man's biology to want to wander. Does that mean he should, or that he can't help it? Of course not. But it does mean that a man is going to have strong-extremely strong-biological urges to knock on the doors of neighboring huts. I have had this argument/discussion/conversation with dozens of men and women: Are men predestined to cheat? My answer is no, they're not-despite their biology. But often times, they do have to fight it. Especially after a pitcher and two shots of Jack.

2). To Get the Attention: News flash: Sure, some guys cheat because, well, maybe the sexual frequency has slowed a bit, and maybe hot-and-heavy happens at home about as often as Rob Schneider gets nominated for an Oscar. But the truth is that plenty of men who are having regular sex with their partner are also having sex with someone else. Why? Because cheating isn't just about the sex. Just as a woman who cheats may be seeking more affection than what she's getting at home, a man often cheats because he's seeking the attention that he no longer gets at home. Part of the allure of the mysterious woman isn't just to find out what she looks like naked; it's that the woman showers the man with flirtations, with seduction, with advances that make him feel like he's worthy of more than just fixing dents in the drywall.

3). To Get Out: I know lots of guys who simply don't have the strength to end it. They may try ("I'm just not happy"), or they may take other tactics to drive a woman away. A lot of guys simply have trouble breaking off relationships because they don't want to be perceived as that bad guy, the jerk, the insensitive lout who ended something good. So they tiptoe around the issue in hopes that she'll get so frustrated that she'll back out first. Well, if that doesn't work, then a man knows that the only way out is to commit the relationship sin that drives a woman away for good. It's not right, but it's what happens.

4). To Change Up His Play List: Think about what's on your iPod. You have your favorite songs you play over and over, but every once in a while, you're in the mood to hear something you haven't played in a long time. You don't need to hear it but once every month or so, but still, you appreciate the changeup. Relationships need to be like good iPods lists. You're comfortable with your routine and you like your routine, but it's always nice to change things up. What men really want in relationships (and what I suspect women also want) is to be able to take comfort in the routine of a long-term commitment, as long as there are some surprises that make it feel like a new relationship every once in a while. In order to keep the relationship strong, you've got to change the songs every once in a while. That goes for in the bedroom and out.

:shrug:

O8)

Mind you, I don't always understand the questions either... :crazy:

Even if it's 'involuntary' cooperation.
;-)

Lots of tips on being healthy...

Though you can guess which section I am inclined to ignore... :(

But I'll answer the points anyway:

1. Yes. Every male of every species is programmed to do this. Yet other species also choose to be monogamous. Why do humans feel the need to relate to guppies?

2. Well, they'd also get attention if they brought up their concerns. Of course, if they got shot down by the dipshit of a "partner" would it almost become understandable, even though it is not acceptable and never will be.

3a. It only hurts them more in the end, and in ways could be worse. Two words: Rumor mill.

3b. Bullshit excuse.

4. Uh, men do that BEFORE marriage.

A word is a bond; if you think you can't keep the bond then don't make it.

women who cheat
why to cheat
why not to cheat
who to cheat with
who to date, marry, or carry on with...

I think the magazines in the 1930's probably did the same articles...they just keep recycling them.

my wife and i used to be involved in 'the lifestyle'...and had a lot of fun with it...we dropped out due to an extended, disabling medical condition i developed(and no, it wasn't an std.) for those with an adventurous spirit and a solid relationship- i'd definitely reccomend giving it a try if you've ever considered it.

Never mind the emotional consideration of the person one is playing with.

I will be on my death bed believing love and sex cannot be separated.

Indeed. On the crusiing site I go to, it's amazing how few people stcik around once you mention "eczema". Indeed, I'm the one who'd be running. I'm clean. I sure as hell wouldn't trust any of them and for more reasons. Even the ones who hype up wanting more than a fling, and those are the ones I bother to respond to.

Doesn't matter.

but also definitely not for everyone.

some people will go to their death beds believing in an immortal human soul.

everyone has their own truths.

That it can be separated.

I grow more attached to other people via physical contact. Maybe it's a form of mental illness.

I have gradually come to realize that. I think it's called oxytocin bonding, and it's totally natural. I know some people don't do that, but I do. I will never, EVER have a "friends with benefits" relationship again. It's just way way too much angst for me. It's really turned me off casual sex too. Bummer. But that's biology, IMO.

Isn't that what Rush got his rush (and later busted) on?

Oxytocin: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oxytocin

Oxycontin: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oxycontin

The confusion is understandable. :D

Just my opinion.

...there are vast areas in that magazine that I'd describe...being charitable, mind you...as "clueless."

Excerpt posted solely as entertainment and / or F.Y.I. value.

:toast:

i think we would be better off as a species if we really understood our biological drives. don't get me wrong, my hubby would have his head handed to him if i caught him fooling around. but i think that you can't control what you don't understand.
i wonder what impact having kids has on that equation. i have a sneaking suspicion that men who have kids who look like they might not carry on are more prone to stray. either no kids, one kid, or a kid that is a disappointment.
evolutionary psychology is a real interesting field.

...but I think there's a 50-50 chance of my getting tombstoned if I post it, so I won't.

But he really got to the heart of "why men do what they do" more honestly than anyone I've ever seen.

:toast:

Or tell us what song you're referring to.

I spent 30 years NOT cheating, despite the readily availability of a world-class "play list."

What a moron.

but you did the right thing.

What a schmuck, eh?

Time wounds all heels, and all that. You did good.

I know it's no consolation, but aren't there SOME good memories of those years to look back on? I mean, you had SOMEONE -- that's more than I have had.