I AM THE LARD! - Democratic Underground

Perseid

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Wed Nov-21-07 01:51 PM
Original message

I AM THE LARD!

not to be confused with the Lord.

ask, pray, question, and I will answer!

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Dr. Strange

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Wed Nov-21-07 01:57 PM
Response to Original message

1. Are you related to the Bard?

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Perseid

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Wed Nov-21-07 02:00 PM
Response to Reply #1

2. I am

his "retard" sister.

that was hard

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jeff30997

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Wed Nov-21-07 02:14 PM
Response to Original message

3. Breakin rocks in the hot sun

I fought the lard and the lard won
I fought the lard and the lard won

I needed diet cause I had none

I fought the lard and the lard won
I fought the lard and the lard won...

:P

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Perseid

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Wed Nov-21-07 02:16 PM
Response to Reply #3

5. you have earned a special place in Leaven for that one!

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DS1

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Wed Nov-21-07 02:16 PM
Response to Original message

4. wow, Writer's ass has become self-aware, and hijacked her PC

:scared:

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Perseid

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Wed Nov-21-07 02:17 PM
Response to Reply #4

6. happens all the time, be not afraid!

say Kumbaya 15 times fast, and all will be well.

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Writer

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Wed Nov-21-07 02:42 PM
Response to Reply #6

11. We pray to the Lard.

Lard hear our prayer.

Love,

~Lard Ass~

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rug

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Wed Nov-21-07 02:19 PM
Response to Original message

7. Do I have to sacrifice a fatted calf?

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Perseid

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Wed Nov-21-07 02:21 PM
Response to Reply #7

8. Lard prefers

thin, well exercised calves. No sacrifice necessary, but nachos would definitely make Lard happy

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jeff30997

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Wed Nov-21-07 02:31 PM
Response to Reply #8

9. Would a nacho man be ok ?

Nacho, nacho man
I've got to be, a nacho man
Nacho, nacho man (yeah, yeah)
I've got to be a nacho!

(Wow,I'm really in a singing mood today!)

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Perseid

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Wed Nov-21-07 02:45 PM
Response to Reply #9

12. it could happen! nt

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qdemn7

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Wed Nov-21-07 02:38 PM
Response to Original message

10. You are the LARD?

I thought you were the ISLAND!

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Perseid

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Wed Nov-21-07 02:48 PM
Response to Reply #10

14. Lards sometimes do get lonely, but

they are never islands.

Shannon Noll said it second best:

Sittin in a hotel miles from nowhere
Thought that this cold be my happiness
I look at the phone and pick it up
For the millionth time I put it down again

I know I let you go
And I've got no right to know

Do you ever get lonely baby
Don't you ever get tired of living that way
Don't you ever wonder whether there's a better life,
out there yeah
Do you ever think about what we had
How you'd giv anything to get it back
Don't you wonder if you'll ever love that way again

If only you could hold me
Do you ever get lonely

I look around the room and wonder
When and why and how my life has changed
I'm surrounded by so many so called friends
And I don't even know their names

When all that you love is gone
Just keep on holding on
Oh tell me

Do you ever miss me
Wishing you could kiss me
If only you could hold me
Do you ever get lonely

I know that this world has changed us
Now we're nothing more than strangers
But do you think about me ever
Do you think we belong together

Do you ever miss me
Wishing you could kiss me
If only you could hold me
Do you ever get lonely
Cos I do...

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KitchenWitch

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Wed Nov-21-07 02:47 PM
Response to Original message

13. Are you better in my pie crust than Crisco?

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Perseid

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Wed Nov-21-07 02:49 PM
Response to Reply #13

15. Crisco rules the world, when

Edited on Wed Nov-21-07 02:50 PM by Perseid

I'm not looking.

or baking

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quip

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Wed Nov-21-07 04:06 PM
Response to Original message

16. What's it like to have Madonna as a mother?

http://news.bbc.co.uk.nyud.net:8090/media/images/42497000/jpg/_42497631_madge_lourdes_pa.jpg

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Perseid

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Wed Nov-21-07 04:09 PM
Response to Reply #16

17. Jesus was my friend, not my brother

I love Madonna's on dashboards. Other than that, meh.

cute kid pic

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quip

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Wed Nov-21-07 04:16 PM
Response to Reply #17

18. too obscure; mea culpa

Edited on Wed Nov-21-07 04:16 PM by temeah

That cute kid is multi-million dollar heiress Lourdes, the daughter of Madonna the pop star. :hi:

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