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Bicoastal (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 12:40 PM Original message |
Post the PUNCHLINE ONLY to your favorite dirty jokes! |
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edbermac (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 12:44 PM Response to Original message |
1. "To get to the other side" |
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MrCoffee (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 12:57 PM Response to Original message |
2. "If you two are right," she sobbed, "I'm going to have puppies!" |
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Rambis (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 12:58 PM Response to Original message |
3. One is a flaming Nazi gasbag and the other is a dirigible |
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Swede (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 01:14 PM Response to Original message |
4. Because he was stuck to the chicken. |
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Iggo (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 01:33 PM Response to Original message |
5. "Hello, big lady." |
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Iggo (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 01:34 PM Response to Original message |
6. . |
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XemaSab (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 01:36 PM Response to Original message |
7. My ass is still sore |
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mitchum (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 01:39 PM Response to Original message |
8. "Me too, mine is as big as a house!" |
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gmoney (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 01:40 PM Response to Original message |
9. "You think YOU'RE Thor? I couldn't thit down for a WEEK!" |
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Ron Green (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 01:41 PM Response to Original message |
10. "You'll have to point it out to me, Lady. All these Japanese cars |
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foxfeet (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 01:43 PM Response to Original message |
11. Bent it, hell; I BROKE it! |
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Dr. Strange (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 01:44 PM Response to Original message |
12. I don't know who those two are, but that one in the middle is Lanny McDonald. |
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Brickbat (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 01:45 PM Response to Original message |
13. It was pissed off. |
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progressoid (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 01:48 PM Response to Original message |
14. The Doctor says "no, the balls will cover your eyes". |
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namahage (678 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 01:49 PM Response to Original message |
15. THE ARISTOCRATS! |
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lunatica (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 09:30 AM Response to Reply #15 |
55. Ditto. The Aristocrats |
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MajorChode (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 01:55 PM Response to Original message |
16. ...if the ASS business doesn't pick up soon, I'm going to lose my FURNITURE |
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Deep13 (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 02:10 PM Response to Original message |
17. Here's a few: |
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LynneSin (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 02:13 PM Response to Original message |
18. eats bushes and leaves |
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seabeyond (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 02:17 PM Response to Original message |
19. so i bucked one and tim bucked two |
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TheMightyFavog (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 02:17 PM Response to Original message |
20. "Your first problem is that your stance is too wide." |
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MilesColtrane (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 03:20 PM Response to Original message |
21. "You don't understand", he sobbed. "Chunks is the name of my dog!" |
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PVnRT (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 03:21 PM Response to Original message |
22. If these are my anal beads, what did I do with that Higgs boson? |
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Rambis (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 03:22 PM Response to Original message |
23. I got chunks of guys like you, in my stool! |
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MiddleFingerMom (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 03:30 PM Response to Original message |
24. Three of them: |
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Terry in Austin (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 05:05 PM Response to Original message |
25. "37" |
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mcctatas (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 05:09 PM Response to Original message |
26. No mon, it says "Welcome to Jamaica, have a nice day" |
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SoCalDem (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 05:11 PM Response to Original message |
27. "What you mean, wrong hole?" |
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nolabear (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 05:23 PM Response to Reply #27 |
29. I cannot believe anyone but me knows that joke! Please ms me the phrase cuz I forgot it! |
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Dr Morbius (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 05:22 PM Response to Original message |
28. Well, remember how you got voted Mayor? |
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Robb (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 05:23 PM Response to Original message |
30. "Rectum? Damn near KILLED 'em!" |
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unpossibles (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 04:56 PM Response to Reply #30 |
68. love that one. nt |
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nolabear (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 05:24 PM Response to Original message |
31. "I thought you were saying 'Fuck or drown!'" |
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applegrove (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 08:41 PM Response to Original message |
32. Only 700 women went down on the Titanic. |
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NoPasaran (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 08:45 PM Response to Original message |
33. "Twenty-five dollars, Father. Same as downtown." |
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rug (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 09:01 PM Response to Original message |
34. "Where is it?" |
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triguy46 (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 09:15 PM Response to Original message |
35. "If screwing a woman is anything like screwing a kangaroo.... |
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triguy46 (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 09:16 PM Response to Original message |
36. "Mom is inside weighing the postman." |
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triguy46 (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 09:17 PM Response to Reply #36 |
37. "Honey, I'm not the bride, I'm just the bridesmaid." |
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azmouse (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 09:17 PM Response to Original message |
38. Why do you ask, TwoDogsFucking? |
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rurallib (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 09:20 PM Response to Original message |
39. "The rest of us put a saddle on the camel and ride it to town!" |
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GreatCaesarsGhost (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 09:20 PM Response to Original message |
40. Well, if he gets out of that, we'll call him Houdini. |
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Tom_Foolery (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 09:23 PM Response to Original message |
41. Walk out? Hell, let's find my car; and we'll drive out. |
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Roon (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 09:28 PM Response to Original message |
42. Send down some more ears of that hot buttered corn! eom |
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MrScorpio (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 09:31 PM Response to Original message |
43. Kermit's finger |
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Bucky (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 09:39 PM Response to Reply #43 |
46. Did Billy D teach you nothing? |
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Sabriel (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 09:37 PM Response to Original message |
44. "OK, this time, YOU hold down the pigeon and I'LL crap on it!" |
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Bucky (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 09:38 PM Response to Original message |
45. And then the doctor says, "What are you trying to do, gross me out?" |
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LostInAnomie (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 09:40 PM Response to Original message |
47. "Oh... I peeled the scabs off." |
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abq e streeter (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 09:54 PM Response to Original message |
48. 2: Yes, but that guy has way better health insurance... and...One's a Goodyear, one's a great year. |
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PassingFair (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Apr-14-10 11:06 PM Response to Original message |
49. "I said POSSE, Tonto!" |
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Brother Buzz (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 12:00 AM Response to Original message |
50. Because their peckers are on their faces |
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laststeamtrain (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 12:14 AM Response to Original message |
51. "My eyes, they're not so good anymore." |
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namahage (678 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 01:26 AM Response to Original message |
52. "I rang the doorbell, didn't I?" |
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guitar man (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 05:02 PM Response to Reply #52 |
70. !!! |
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csziggy (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 01:31 AM Response to Original message |
53. "They will never let us eat in Howard Johnsons again." |
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SidDithers (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 09:27 AM Response to Original message |
54. "She's not insane. She's fucking Goofy!"...nt |
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Blue_Tires (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 09:33 AM Response to Original message |
56. "She's in the back room making Johnnie Walker red" |
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Blue_Tires (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 09:35 AM Response to Original message |
57. Tiger Woods is on TV with something long, hard and flexible in his hands |
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sarge43 (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 09:54 AM Response to Original message |
58. "Or we could walk down and fuck 'em all." |
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sarge43 (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 07:26 PM Response to Reply #58 |
75. The rest of the joke |
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Tom_Foolery (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 10:26 AM Response to Original message |
59. I'm just having a beer with my son-in-law. n/t |
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bif (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 11:28 AM Response to Original message |
60. So they kicked me out of the KFC! |
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MicaelS (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 12:44 PM Response to Original message |
61. You're a mean drunk, Superman. n/t |
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Lance_Boyle (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 02:03 PM Response to Original message |
62. "No, but I have a girlfriend at Wisconsin." |
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brendan120678 (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 02:13 PM Response to Original message |
63. And then, the third nun fainted!! |
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hibbing (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 02:35 PM Response to Original message |
64. "She came back with a big red snapper" |
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EFerrari (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 02:55 PM Response to Original message |
65. "They all did." |
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foxfeet (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 03:37 PM Response to Original message |
66. "Well, he put one hand on my right shoulder and one hand on my left shoulder and |
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Happyhippychick (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 04:03 PM Response to Original message |
67. "I'm fucking her" |
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TheDebbieDee (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 04:58 PM Response to Original message |
69. And the doctor said, "It's blind, too!" |
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guitar man (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 05:04 PM Response to Original message |
71. Dammit!! |
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MrSlayer (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 05:06 PM Response to Original message |
72. "Getting the blood off of your clown suit" |
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ScreamingMeemie (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 06:23 PM Response to Original message |
73. "I said she has ACUTE ANGINA!" |
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Duer 157099 (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 06:27 PM Response to Original message |
74. OK, *now* all of you need to reply to your own posts with the rest of the joke |
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Crabby Appleton (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Thu Apr-15-10 07:55 PM Response to Original message |
76. because Thursday is your turn in the barrel. |
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cemaphonic (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Fri Apr-16-10 02:20 AM Response to Original message |
77. "Oh, man, they got my girl too!" |
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IntravenousDemilo (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Fri Apr-16-10 03:44 AM Response to Original message |
78. "She must be full." |
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MajorChode (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Fri Apr-16-10 04:13 AM Response to Original message |
79. No, let's walk down and fuck 'em all |
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MajorChode (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Fri Apr-16-10 04:13 AM Response to Reply #79 |
80. You told me how old you were yesterday |
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MajorChode (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Fri Apr-16-10 05:01 AM Response to Original message |
81. My husband said, "Fuck him, give him a dollar" |
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cloudbase (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Fri Apr-16-10 10:46 AM Response to Original message |
82. Must be the cobblestones. |
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Orsino (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Fri Apr-16-10 11:55 AM Response to Original message |
83. So the bartender said, "May I push in your stool?" |
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Beer Snob-50 (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Fri Apr-16-10 12:18 PM Response to Original message |
84. how much is a brazillian? |
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Recovered Repug (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Fri Apr-16-10 03:19 PM Response to Original message |
85. 1. Did Sam stop by with the $500 he owed me? |
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Yavin4 (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Fri Apr-16-10 03:28 PM Response to Original message |
86. "You Fuck Like A Chinaman" |
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Ikonoklast (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Fri Apr-16-10 03:45 PM Response to Original message |
87. "...and when I pulled my hand back out, I had *two* watches on my wrist!" |
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jakefrep (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Fri Apr-16-10 04:59 PM Response to Original message |
88. "...lastly, never EVER refer to the Blessed Virgin Mary as "Mary with the Cherry"" |
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kimmerspixelated (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Fri Apr-16-10 05:46 PM Response to Original message |
89. No, I didn't say she was crazy, I said she was fucking Goofy! |
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DU AdBot (1000+ posts) | Sun May 12th 2024, 06:14 PM Response to Original message |
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