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Seventh inning stretch is over. Time to play ball.

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JeffR Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-28-06 07:55 PM
Original message
Seventh inning stretch is over. Time to play ball.
That F-16 flyover during the stretch was something, huh? And "God Bless America" kinda choked me up, even though it seemed to go on for about fifty stanzas.

Screwy game, huh? Folks in the bleachers singing "Take Me Out to the BallGame", rain starts pouring and bang, the mezzanine level gets flooded. Makes you wonder why there aren't any groundscrew bailing it out.

Nasty stories going around about the box-office receipts these days, too. Hard to believe we can still afford to keep the lights on in here. I can remember when this place turned an honest-to-God profit.

Don't even get me started on the umpires. It's like they're on the take. We get three strikes, their guys get four or five.

0 and 3 in our last matchups with these preening, strutting steroid-swiggers. Why? Well, we wuz robbed, that's why. Don't expect the baseball writers to tell it that way, though.

We're on our own here. Our starters look like they're done. Time to see how much bench strength we got.

Hang on. Hear that sound? Ballpark's half-empty as usual, but half the crowd - more! - is cheering for us. Holy crap. Cheering. For us.

Look at their guy. What is he, hung over? Drunk maybe? Jeez. And didja hear this? He admitted to cheating. Kid you not. And no suspension, no fine, not even a slap on the wrist from what I heard. Crazy spitballing bastard even said he's going to keep on doing it, too.

Ya know, he's been tipping his pitches for the last few innings. Not that it matters. He's throwing nothing but curveballs anyway. Guess he's all outta spit tonight.

I'm starting to like our chances here.

Maybe a seeing-eye double while their infield is busy scratching their crotches and daydreaming about their endorsement deals. Or a couple base hits and a wild pitch. (You can take that last one to the bank.)

Feels like the season goes on forever nowadays, huh? Hey, what's the choice? We play or go home, right?

Rain's stopped.

Don't know about you, but it's starting to look like a hell of a night for a ballgame.
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TygrBright Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-28-06 07:59 PM
Response to Original message
1. Gorgeous! Poetry!!
Thank you! First big genuine SE grin that's crossed my face today.

A tip o' the cap to you.

appreciatively,
Bright
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JeffR Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-28-06 08:08 PM
Response to Reply #1
4. Back atcha.
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Dogmudgeon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-28-06 07:59 PM
Response to Original message
2. If this is an extended metaphor, it's great
If it's about a game being played, well, I'm not much for following sports.

Where's my Louisville Slugger? Yep -- next to the 'puter. My glove is broken in, and when I play Third Base, nobody gets Home.

--p!ay ball!
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JeffR Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-28-06 08:09 PM
Response to Reply #2
5. If you liked it
I'm going to say it was metaphoric.
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babylonsister Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-28-06 08:05 PM
Response to Original message
3. Love it! And yes, the season has been 'realllly' long! nt
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JeffR Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-28-06 08:10 PM
Response to Reply #3
6. Amen
We're going to need plenty of linament to get through the ninth.
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salinen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-28-06 08:10 PM
Response to Original message
7. Well done!
Is that guy in the bullpen whose not a ballplayer wearing a cup?
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JeffR Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-28-06 09:23 PM
Response to Reply #7
12. Ouch!
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bleever Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-28-06 08:28 PM
Response to Original message
8. Five votes and you're up.
Really enjoyed reading that. Very timely, too.


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JeffR Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-28-06 09:23 PM
Response to Reply #8
13. Magic time of year, in more ways than one
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understandinglife Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-28-06 08:37 PM
Response to Original message
9. "Time to see how much bench strength we got." Yep.
Recommended. Well done.


If You're pro-Bush, You're anti-America -- just so everyone knows which team their cheering ....
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JeffR Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-28-06 09:25 PM
Response to Reply #9
14. Great thing about this game
Even a rookie can hit a grand slam or throw a no-hitter. We'll see.
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alittlelark Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-28-06 08:42 PM
Response to Original message
10. A lot of the crowd slept through the 1st 6 innings...
I think they're waking up. As soon as they rub the sleep from their eyes they're gonna look around.

It could be a GREAT ballgame!
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JeffR Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-28-06 09:27 PM
Response to Reply #10
16. ..
:popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn:
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hunter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-28-06 09:13 PM
Response to Original message
11. This caveman carries a club.
I'll be pounding it home.
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JeffR Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-28-06 09:28 PM
Response to Reply #11
17. Touch 'em all on your way around!
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Ishoutandscream2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-28-06 09:25 PM
Response to Original message
15. Wow, this really got me pumped up
I'm a baseball fanatic, and reading this makes me want to go out and "pull harder for the team." I can't tell you how wonderfully written this is. Absolutely, absolutely brilliant.

Damn, put me in, Coach!!
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JeffR Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-28-06 09:30 PM
Response to Reply #15
18. Thank you
Now get out there. And play.
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Saboburns Donating Member (690 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-28-06 09:47 PM
Response to Original message
19. Doffing my cap.
That was as succinct and entertaining appraisal of the situation as I've seen.

We'll played man.
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NanceGreggs Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-28-06 10:18 PM
Response to Original message
20. And JeffR hits one out of the ballpark!
K'd & R'd - natch!

:kick:
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