* The "Know Your Place Test": What's your Class?
(1) What keeps you up at night? A: Sound of your own weeping
B: Growing suspicion that you've been duped
C: "Should my topiary animals be alphabetized by plant or animal they represent?"
(2) Your annual Federal Tax Bill...A: $0
B: $25,000
C: $0
(3) Favorite Drink...A: Grain alcohol and Robitussin
B: Chardonnay
C: Human Growth Hormone
(4) Plan for Accuring Wealth...A: Powerball ticket
B: Scrimping and saving
C: Continuing to breathe
(5) What do you eat for breakfast?A: High-Fructose Corn Syrup
B: Whatever Jenny Craid said I could
C: Scrambled Faberge Eggs
(6) Where did you go on your last vacation?A: The fire escape
B: Mall of America
C: Private Island shaped like me
(7) What TV Show best reflects your life?A: And broadcast with Anderson Cooper on the edge of tears
B: Everybody Loves RaymondC: History Channel:
Finding Nazi Gold(8) What kind of shoes do you wear?A: $175 Nike Air Force 25 Supremes
B: Whatever Payless had in my size
C: No shoes. I had the back yard leathered.
Now, count up all your A's, B's and C's.
Mostly A's: You are Lower Class
Mostly B's: You are Middle Class
Mostly C's: You are Upper Class
* Adapted from a chart in Stephen Colbert book,
I Am America (And, So Can You) ALL A's: You are probably reading this from the Library Computer, right?
ALL B's: Why aren't you at your kid's Soccer game?
ALL C's: What the hell are you doing here on DU?
Share your results, and comment, if you feel like it!
TC