You all are the biggest bunch of hobbits I've ever seen!

Rumor-mongering, drunken little creatures with hairy feet and a general distrust of outsiders.

Why don't you all smoke some Longbottom Leaf, you Shire rats! I'm going to comb my long hair and spend countless hours deciding if you all are worth my time.

This is you!



Humph!

~Writer the Elf~

This is a picture of the kind of elf you are!

Grrrrr!!

Can't be helped... She's an artist. She paints pictures of Hillary Clinton.

:dunce:

I'll get my sword.

than an orc!

Don't tell no one.

“Do you like what you doth see…?” said the voluptuous elf-maiden
as she provocatively parted the folds of her robe to reveal the rounded,
shadowy glories within. Obama’s throat was dry, though his head reeled
with desire and ale.

She slipped off the flimsy garment and strode toward the fascinated
Obama unashamed of her (hillary clinton). She ran a perfect hand along his
hairy toes, as he helplessly watched them curl with fierce insistent
wanting of her.

“Let me make thee more comfortable,” she whispered hoarsely, fiddling
with the clasps of his jerkin, loosening his sword belt with a laugh.

“Touch me, oh touch me,” she crooned.

Obama’s hand, as though of its own will, reached out and traced the
delicate swelling of her (hillary clinton), while the other slowly
crept around her tiny, flawless (hillary clinton), crushing her to his
barrel chest.

“Toes, I love hairy toes,” she moaned, forcing him down on the silvered
carpet. Her tiny pink toes caressed the luxuriant fur of his instep,
while Obama’s nose sought out thw warmth of her precious elf-navel.

“But I’m so small and hairy, and… and you’re so beautiful,” Obama
whimpered, slipping clumsily put of his crossed garters.

The elf-maiden said nothing, but only sighed deep in her throat and
held him more firmly to her faunlike body. “There is one thing you
must do for me first,” she whispered into one tufted ear.

“Anything,” sobbed Obama, growing frantic with his need. “Anything!”

“The Presidency,” she said. “I must have the Presidency.”

Obama’s whole body tensed. “Oh no,” he cried “not that! Anything but … that.”

Obama’s eyes blurred with tears and confusion. “I can’t,” he said. “I mustn’t!”

But he knew resolve was no longer strong in him.
Slowly, the elf-maiden’s hand inched toward the chain in his vest pocket,
closer and closer it came to the Ring Obama had guarded so faithfully…
___________________________________________

Good stuff.

I love you too.

because if you had you would realise that hobbits are the commonwealth of humanity. They are the small, unconsidered people from whom the truly great come. The "big folk" think nothing of them and hardly memorialise them but without hobbits all the heroism of Aragorn, Faramir, Eowyn, Eomer, Gimli, Legolas, Arwen and the rest would have meant nothing. Even Gandalf does not see their true greatness until after his ascension - and Gandalf was Maia; an angel, if you will.

At the end the "War of the Ring" was no more than a glorious, heroic, murderous feint that allowed Hobbits to perform what none of the Big Folk could do, which was destroy the Ring.

So we are Hobbits? Thank you, you complement us more than you realise.

At the end the "War in Iraq" was no more than a glorious, heroic, murderous feint that allowed Bush Administration to perform what none of the Big Folk could do, which was destroy the United States economy.

;)

Actually I'm rereading the LOTR as we speak. I first read the books when I was 7 or 8. It's been a while.

I thought Bob Hope was performing tonight. Where the fuck is my cocktail waitress?!!

you'd finally learn to enjoy Joey Heatherton and puking all morning long.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wnO8aIf2fco&feature=related

http://objflicks.com/TakeMeBackToTheSixties.htm :hippie:

I got a serious lava lamp injury because of you hippies. I'll never go near a sugar cube for the rest of my fucking life.

Get a haircut. Christ! It's been what? Thirty years? I'll give you the four bucks and busfare. Get that damn hair cut.

How long do your mothers have to cry themselves to sleep before you stop killing her with your lax grooming?

I am self conscious about my little Hobbit!
:mad:

:hi:

And put some place really warm.

:silly: