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I am glad some of you prefer to call your spouses partners

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dsc Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun May-10-09 04:27 PM
Original message
I am glad some of you prefer to call your spouses partners
but because Wanda Sykes doesn't get to use the word wife in Virginia had she collapsed after the Correspondents dinner and been rushed to a Virginia hospital, her parents or her siblings would have had to make all medical decisions and her wife would have not been permitted in her room. Virginia law, which was supported by our current national chairman, bans any and all recognition of any document (be it public or private) that confers any benefit of marriage upon a same sex couple. So you can call yourselves partners until the cows come home and give birth to aliens, but because she can't call herself wife, she doesn't have the rights you do. It doesn't get simpler, or less semantic, than that.
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CTyankee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun May-10-09 04:32 PM
Response to Original message
1. Thanks. It's good to have a clear understanding.
Some of us get hung up on the "wife" and "husband" thing because of sexism issues. I consider my husband a partner in everything but in reality I refer to him as my husband usually. A partner can be a business partner, a law partner, a partner in a medical practice, etc. The wife/husband thing IS special, as you correctly point out. I would not have been able to be included in my husband's health plan if we had not produced a marriage license. This is important, again, as you correctly point out.

We straights must listen and listen hard to what gays are telling us. We have to talk the talk and walk the walk.

thank you again, dsc.
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Name removed Donating Member (0 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun May-10-09 04:36 PM
Response to Original message
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Xipe Totec Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun May-10-09 04:41 PM
Response to Original message
3. I call my spouse,
Edited on Sun May-10-09 04:47 PM by Xipe Totec
My spouse.

And she has specific instructions, should the situation ever arise, where I cannot speak for myself,


D. N. R.

(Do Not Resuscitate).

Heck, she has specific instructions to pull the plug herself, if necessary.
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Zenlitened Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun May-10-09 04:44 PM
Response to Original message
4. Oh, c'mon! That sort of thing could never happen...
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Lex Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun May-10-09 04:44 PM
Response to Original message
5. If you are legally married, you can call your spouse whatever you'd like
but you'd STILL have a legally recognized marriage.


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LostinVA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun May-10-09 04:46 PM
Response to Reply #5
7. You're just bitter because
Well, of something.

hmmmmmmm
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dipsydoodle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun May-10-09 04:46 PM
Response to Original message
6. I'd have thought it was more common
Edited on Sun May-10-09 05:34 PM by dipsydoodle
to call people by their name. For example, I always called my wife who died back in 1990 when she 45, Morag. Would'nt have dreamt of calling her anything else.
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FreakinDJ Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun May-10-09 04:52 PM
Response to Original message
8. Does "Fun Bunns" count
just checking.....
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Honeycombe8 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun May-10-09 05:43 PM
Response to Original message
9. Virginians need to start working on the VA legislature to recognize unions.
Or maybe she and her partner could move? I moved to another state in order to get a better job. People have to do that sort of thing all the time.
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dsc Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun May-10-09 06:46 PM
Response to Reply #9
14. she lives in CA
but I used her as an example because she was in DC last night. If you take cruises you go through FL which now has the same rules as VA. If you fly to DC you go through VA since it has Reagan national. If you fly to South America you go through Atlanta which has Georgia's ban.
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AllentownJake Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun May-10-09 05:54 PM
Response to Original message
10. The fight is going to be long
but worth it.

I wish we woke up in a society that was equitable, however, we need to fight for the society we want.

I stand with you in the battle. I may disagree on how to fight it or what is worth expending energy over, than again, my rights aren't the one being curtailed in these situations.

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Sparkly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun May-10-09 06:09 PM
Response to Original message
11. I agree, and the word "partner" is inexact.
Stinky often talks about his "partner" -- that's his business partner.

If I talk about my "partner," it's my dance partner.

I don't know how you feel about it, dsc, but it seems to me it's an "acceptable" word because it can seem vague enough to imply partnerships other than life, romantic, and/or sexual partnerships.

It isn't the same as "wife" or "husband," for anyone. There's no way any words equalize the situation.
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JerseygirlCT Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun May-10-09 06:43 PM
Response to Original message
12. Absolutely. nt
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polichick Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun May-10-09 06:45 PM
Response to Original message
13. I'm 100% with you on gay marriage (have been for decades)...
...and I really think Pres. Obama used the word "partner" because he was including himself and Axelrod in that joke and didn't need for the people who think Colbert is a Republican to jump to the conclusion that the president was suddenly coming out.

(If you're referring to Obama's joke, that is.)
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