KOEB 1/28/08 State of Keith's Union Edition

Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 07:58 PM
Original message

KOEB 1/28/08 State of Keith's Union Edition

Ladies and gentlemen, the man who SHOULD be President of the United States will now give his address.

:hi: Thank you for listening.

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SeattleGirl

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:02 PM
Response to Original message

1. Hi Berry! Howdy all!

Who will NOT be watching "The Embarassing Vocal Stumblings of The Commander Guy" tonight?

:hi:

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ralps

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:03 PM
Response to Reply #1

5. Hi SeattleGirl, I will be listening to Mike Malloy & taping Georgie & the Dem.

response.

:hi: :loveya: :hug: :pals: :woohoo:

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SeattleGirl

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:04 PM
Response to Reply #5

7. Sounds like a good plan, ralps.

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:03 PM
Response to Reply #1

6. Would that be you?

:hi:

I have to celebrate it being his last EVER!

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SeattleGirl

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:05 PM
Response to Reply #6

10. I don't know if I can bring myself to listen to it.

Afraid I'll throw stuff at the teevee.

Maybe I should get MrSG to tie me to a chair so I can't get my hands on anything. :crazy:

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WolverineDG

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:05 PM
Response to Reply #1

9. I'm not

I've got a hard day at work tomorrow & getting drunk via the STFU Drinking game won't help. :cry:

dg

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SeattleGirl

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:06 PM
Response to Reply #9

11. There you go.

If I do watch, you can believe I'm staying away from the alcohol!

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ralps

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:02 PM
Response to Original message

2. Hi BerryBush, Hi Everyone!

:hi: :loveya: :hug: :pals: :woohoo:

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:03 PM
Response to Original message

3. Hi, all!

I'm behind in my drinking. I have some catching up to do before the SOTU.

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:08 PM
Response to Reply #3

14. Hey Pats, did you check out the thread on Steph possibly meeting Keith tonight?

Looks like he's not in LA yet, though. Oh well!

And did you check this out?

http://smfhc.com/

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:13 PM
Response to Reply #14

19. I did!

I posted over there. LOL.

I don't think they'll be near each other, unfortunately. And of course they'd put her on with Dan. :mad: Although he lurves her. :loveya:

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:26 PM
Response to Reply #19

24. I think it's hilarious that Dan apparently doesn't mind that Steph thinks he's hot and flirts

with him, whereas Keith gets all wrenched out over it. :rofl:

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:28 PM
Response to Reply #24

29. I think Dan would make her happy

Since Keith is otherwise occupied. :eyes:

Mama, don't forget our invites to the wedding, 'k?

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:36 PM
Response to Reply #29

41. Keith acts like he's flipping married already.

As the Big Dog said about something else, "Give. Me. A. Break."

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WolverineDG

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:29 PM
Response to Reply #24

31. I like how she makes him giggle like a school girl

and blush too.

:evilgrin:

dg

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bleever

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:27 PM
Response to Reply #14

27. This should be hanging in the clubhouse:

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:41 PM
Response to Reply #27

45. Now THAT picture makes me laugh.

I love the picture of Keith chosen for it, too. Perfect.

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Botany

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:26 PM
Response to Reply #3

26. KO was supposed to be in LA tonight.

Did Mama make him run?

:rofl:

Estrogen = a wicked drug

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:39 PM
Response to Reply #26

42. She probably did.

No other woman is allowed to TOUCH him now, you know. Or maybe she can so long as she holds a handkerchief in one hand and he grabs the other end. Otherwise, he's Forbidden To Touch Females Other Than His Girlfriend.

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WolverineDG

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:03 PM
Response to Original message

4. So, are we watching the STFU together tonight?

OOOh, nice purple tie, Keith! :loveya:

Obama gets endorsed by the Kennedys. Ouch, Hil, that's gotta hurt.

dg

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:04 PM
Response to Reply #4

8. I'll be watching, even though I should have gotten more alcohol first.

After all, it's the last one, which is worth celebrating.

Keith looks luscious tonight.

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WolverineDG

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:06 PM
Response to Original message

12. Berry, is Keith in NY or LA?

It looks like he's in NYC.

dg

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:08 PM
Response to Reply #12

13. Maybe it's a green screen

Maybe he's in The Soup studio and the whole background is 30 Rock on CG? :)

:hi:

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:11 PM
Response to Reply #13

17. I too was wondering if they were "faking it"

Edited on Mon Jan-28-08 08:12 PM by BerryBush

but then I wondered why they would bother. They've never lied about where he was before.

Enhanced the background he had to work with, yes. But not made it look on purpose like he was elsewhere.

Then again, this IS Stephanie Miller we're talking about.

Edit: So much for that idea. If Keith isn't in New York, wherever he is, Jonathan Alter is there with him!

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Botany

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:10 PM
Response to Original message

15. Ask not what Botany can do for an EDV but .....

.... what the EDVs can do for Botany.

:rofl:

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SeattleGirl

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:12 PM
Response to Reply #15

18. .......

:spank:

:rofl:

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Botany

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:30 PM
Response to Reply #18

33. Did I ever tell you that you are my Fav?

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SeattleGirl

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:35 PM
Response to Reply #33

40. ......

:woohoo: :woohoo:

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Botany

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:52 PM
Response to Reply #40

57. Watch the boats .... feed the gulls

And eat some fried clams.

Years ago my brother, a friend, my mom, and I went to Lincoln park.

We dug a ton of gooey ducks (large clams) and left in the back yard in a
pail .... we woke in the morning and the gulls had found the clams ....
they opened them by dropping them on our street .... all over.

My mom said that we will not talk about the clams for awhile :rofl:

Lincoln Park

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SeattleGirl

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:55 PM
Response to Reply #57

59. Gotta watch out for those gulls!

They will eat anything and everything, whether you want them to or not! :rofl:

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Botany

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:00 PM
Response to Reply #59

62. Our house was close to Sand Point.

Boy did they make a mess.

BTW did only 4 of the 9 Supreme Court Justices show up?

Bush is in deep shit.

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SeattleGirl

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:05 PM
Response to Reply #62

66. I hope it's gull shit.

:rofl:

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Botany

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:10 PM
Response to Reply #66

69. No a large clam dropped from 40 feet made quite an impact on a Chevy

Pieces of shell were up and down two blocks.

Some old guy stopped by and mentioned that you should keep any shellfish
in the garage .... my Dad thanked him .... he was glad because he did not like
fish.

time for me to go ... I can't stomach that jerk! 5 more killed in Iraq today.

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bleever

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:11 PM
Response to Original message

16. Hey, chimpy, I got the state of yer union right here.

:hi:

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:14 PM
Response to Reply #16

20. I like that.

And thanks for the KOOS, Jonathan!

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:23 PM
Response to Original message

21. #4 Little Miss Sunshine State

:rofl:

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SeattleGirl

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:24 PM
Response to Reply #21

22. They have such a way with titles!

:rofl:

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Botany

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:24 PM
Response to Original message

23. Hillary what a vulture

Both FL and MI were out of bounds for everybody .... she will do or say anything.

***********************************************************************
Just a side post ..... Bush can write better than William F Buckley?

George W Bush is a gifted writer ...... It was on Fox ..... it must be true.

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,325728,00.html

• McGurn, a veteran of the Wall Street Journal and National Review, also told us that President Bush is the most exacting editor he’s every had.

“I've been edited by Bob Bartley and Bill Buckley and the president is by far the most thorough and sharp editor.”

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:26 PM
Response to Reply #23

25. That story rules.

I believe it; he's just a misunderstood genius. :eyes:

Hillary is transparent, and it's sad. :hi:

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Botany

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:28 PM
Response to Reply #25

30. If he didn't have that "little problem" with subject verb agreement

http://www.dubyaspeak.com/freshdubya.phtml

There is no doubt in my mind when history was written, the final page will say victory was achieved by
the United States of America for the good of the world.
Dubya predicts the future in the past tense, Camp Arifjan, Kuwait, Jan. 12, 2008

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:27 PM
Response to Reply #23

28. Whoopee, MORE Bonus Keith tomorrow night!!!!

I'm lovin' it!!!! :loveya:

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:29 PM
Response to Reply #28

32. "Try putting up a portrait of Mr. Magoo!"

Oh, Keith... :rofl:

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:31 PM
Response to Reply #32

35. Is he on a personal crusade

to say George Orwell as many times as possible? Not that there's anything wrong with that...

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WolverineDG

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:31 PM
Response to Reply #23

34. "he's every had"????

I hope that was a typo on your part, Bot...otherwise, consider the source....

just sayin'

dg

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Botany

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:33 PM
Response to Reply #34

36. good eye

no that was cut and paste from a Fox.

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:34 PM
Response to Reply #36

38. Keith gives a shout-out to Cris Collinsworth AND TO ME!!!!!!!

I didn't know he shared his birthday with Eric Wedge!!

But THAT one was for me!!!! :loveya:

:hi: Hi Keith!!!! Hope you had a great birthday...but not TOO great.

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:43 PM
Response to Reply #23

48. Editor???? EDITOR?!?!?!?!?!?

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

I can just see him now:

"Um, ya got that part wrong. Ya misspelt 'nucular.' See, it's N-U-K-U-L-E-R."

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:33 PM
Response to Original message

37. Happy Birthday, Keith!

:toast:

Margo Timmons, from Cowboy Junkies! Alright!

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:35 PM
Response to Original message

39. Yes.

Miss Utah was very odd. I watched a bout ten minutes of the Miss America reality show on CMT, and she was a strange one. The pushups were almost expected.

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:40 PM
Response to Original message

43. Alright

Before DU slows to a crawl, I'd just like to say I didn't appreciate the live shots of the Prince of Darkness entering the chamber.

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SeattleGirl

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:40 PM
Response to Reply #43

44. Yeah, no kidding.

Gonna ruin my dinner!

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bleever

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:41 PM
Response to Original message

46. Here comes Obama with his posse.

I want to be at THEIR after-party.

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:47 PM
Response to Reply #46

54. Hillary in power-suit red.

:hi:

What, you think Teddy knows how to party?

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bleever

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:54 PM
Response to Reply #54

58. I'll guarantee you one thing:

Jello shots.

:hi:

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:58 PM
Response to Reply #58

60. Oh, no

Pickles in the house!

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bleever

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:02 PM
Response to Reply #60

64. Skeletor at one o'clock!

It's like the freakin' Thriller video.

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WolverineDG

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:42 PM
Response to Original message

47. HE JUST LEFT THE WHITE HOUSE!!!

:woohoo: :bounce: :woohoo:

Oh, he just meant for the STFU.

Fuck.

dg

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SeattleGirl

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:43 PM
Response to Reply #47

50. Seady there, Wolvie.

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WolverineDG

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:46 PM
Response to Reply #50

53. Damn

now I need a drink

Thanks for getting my hopes up, Keith. :grr:

:rofl:

dg

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:44 PM
Response to Reply #47

51. LOL!

Soon, honey. Soon.

:rofl:

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:44 PM
Response to Reply #47

52. Yeah, too bad they didn't mean he was leaving for good.

I guess we're anticipating too much.

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:43 PM
Response to Original message

49. The Repubs are backing away from T elecom immunity?

Did I hear that correctly?

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ralps

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:49 PM
Response to Original message

55. Today's worst person in the world is Mary Katherine Hamm of Townhall!!

:hi: :loveya: :hug: :pals: :woohoo:

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:52 PM
Response to Reply #55

56. Wow, Keith is sure showing a lot of contempt for someone who was only 15 or 16 in 1998

and doesn't remember what happened to Bill when he was in office.

Then again, some people were only 14.

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 08:59 PM
Response to Reply #56

61. OMG, Laura is in Nancy Reagan red.

"Who likes to leave at the bottom?" says Tweety!! :rofl:

Should we start a new thread for those who will stay for the speech?

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SeattleGirl

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:02 PM
Response to Original message

63. Kindasleazy is popular???????

Not with me, she isn't! :puke:

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bleever

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:04 PM
Response to Reply #63

65. Me neither.

Lord a mighty but she's a disgrace.

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bleever

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:07 PM
Response to Original message

67. The sergeant-at-arms just mistakenly called him the "president".

:shrug:

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:09 PM
Response to Reply #67

68. Habit.

That's what it said on the card.

They can sit down now. Oh, here we go again with the applause.

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:13 PM
Response to Reply #68

70. He is slurring like a total drunken sot.

I can't believe he's still pushing "tax relief."

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:15 PM
Response to Reply #70

71. And he's getting a huge standing O for it

from the only kind of people who benefit from his "tax relief."

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:16 PM
Response to Reply #71

73. And it's another huge standing O for a balanced budget!

Which we're going to get somehow DESPITE spending tons of money on an endless war! Yeah!!!!!! :applause:

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:16 PM
Response to Reply #70

72. He just said people's taxes have risen

Who the fuck raised their taxes??

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:17 PM
Response to Reply #72

74. Nobody raised taxes on the rich.

What a liar.

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:19 PM
Response to Reply #74

75. "And we're going to make healthcare more affordable and accessible

by telling you to MAKE EFFING SURE YOU NEVER GET SICK!!!!" :applause:

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:20 PM
Response to Reply #75

76. "And we're going to make sure the judgments about your medical care

are made not in the halls of Congress, but...by the insurance companies!" :applause:

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:21 PM
Response to Reply #76

77. "No one can deny the success of the No Child Left Behind Act"????

No one told me this was a COMEDY act!

Listen to what tepid applause THAT gets!

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:24 PM
Response to Reply #77

79. "Let's expand Pell Grants so we can rescue poor children from failing public schools

so the only kids left in the public schools will be...um, uh...so there won't BE any more public schools, and we can completely privatize education!" :applause: "In fact, let's give the private schools on a no-bid contract to KBR and Blackwater!" :applause:

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:23 PM
Response to Reply #74

78. It's like the party elders wrote this speech

Frame it the way we want the Republican Party to look for the 2008 elections, not the way it really is. Like I'm supposed to believe he's suddenly a fiscal conservative who also cares about Pell Grants. Ha!

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:25 PM
Response to Reply #78

80. "We must show other countries that democracy leads to a better life."

"We proved it to all them Iraqis. Now we gotta prove it around the world!" :applause:

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:26 PM
Response to Reply #80

81. "We must take displaced workers whose jobs have been sent overseas

and train them for new jobs...You know, take an engineer whose six-figure job has been outsourced to Bangalore and retrain him to be a greeter at Wal-Mart!" :applause:

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:27 PM
Response to Reply #81

83. "We need to reduce gas emissions that are harmful to the environment...

...so I pledge that from now on, for the rest of my life, I will STIFLE all my farts!" :applause:

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:27 PM
Response to Reply #80

82. Oy.

But he did just admit there are greenhouse gases. I guess that's something. :eyes:

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:30 PM
Response to Reply #82

84. "We now can do all the research we need with adult stem cells..."

"...so just SHUT UP about those embryonic stem cells! And you can just FORGET about those human-animal hybrids!" :applause:

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:31 PM
Response to Reply #84

85. "The Constitution means what it says...

...or should I say, what WE say it means!

"...The Constitution? What was that again? You mean we still HAVE that thing around?!?!?"

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:32 PM
Response to Reply #85

86. "We need more funds for faith-based organizations!

"Because God knows the gov'mint ain't gonna he'p ya!" :applause:

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:34 PM
Response to Reply #86

88. "We're gonna get rid a' all those illegal aliens!

"Except the ones we want around as indentured servants!" :applause:

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:32 PM
Response to Reply #84

87. What about switchgrass?

I put my entire 401K into switchgrass futures. :scared:

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:35 PM
Response to Reply #87

89. I'm disappointed he didn't say "switchgrass."

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:36 PM
Response to Reply #89

90. "Our foreign policy is based on one principle...

...kill 'em all and let God sort 'em out!!" :applause:

Oh, and here come the 9/11 and "liberty" and "freedom" references.

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:38 PM
Response to Reply #90

91. What the hell does this man have to do with integrity and decency?

Is anyone's Irony Meter just spinning now?

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:39 PM
Response to Reply #91

92. He used the phrase "young democracy."

He had to.

Oh, and "We've increased the number of our troops...we're now accepting autistic third-grade dropouts!" :applause:

Oh, and here comes "The surge is WORKING!" :applause:

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:41 PM
Response to Reply #92

93. "Let's hear it for the TROOPS, people!"

"And cuddly kittens and cute puppies!! And Mom and apple pie!! Yeah!!!!" :applause:

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:43 PM
Response to Reply #93

94. Terrorrrerrrrorrristssss.

Wow.

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:45 PM
Response to Reply #94

95. "We got the evildoers on the RUN!"

"Yeah! Smoke 'em out!! Shock 'n' awe!!!!" :applause:

"To our troops...you will have all you need to protect our nation...for however long you're in Iraq...be that five more years, ten, twenty..."

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:48 PM
Response to Reply #95

96. "An' we got lotsa our troops now comin' HOME!

"An' it's about time...they only been there since 2005! We're finally lettin' the ones been there than long come HOME!" :applause:

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:49 PM
Response to Reply #96

97. "The Iraqis just passed a de-Ba'athification law..."

"...heh heh, I thought that was kinda funny, 'cuz I din't know them dirty people TOOK baths!" :applause:

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:50 PM
Response to Reply #97

98. "We will not rest until this enemy has been defeated!"

"Which means we're gon' be in Iraq FOREVER 'N' EVER!" :applause:

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:53 PM
Response to Reply #98

99. Condi Rice. What a sourball.

She looks like she's just eaten a lemon. In other words, like she usually does.

Oh man, he's wearing me down. I can't keep up with his stupidity anymore. Now he's into the "Iran is eeevul" part. "They're enriching uranium, which COULD be used to create a nucular weapon."

Gosh, where have we heard THAT one before??????"

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:55 PM
Response to Reply #99

100. He's lying about "terror attacks" we supposedly "prevented" again.

How much longer does this crap last?

Oh, here comes the "We gotta listen in on your conversations" thing.

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 09:57 PM
Response to Reply #100

101. "America opposes genocide in Sudan."

There's going out on a limb for ya!

"But torturing people we think are our enemies, that's OK!" :applause:

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 10:00 PM
Response to Reply #101

102. "Let's care for our wounded warriors..."

"...now that we've been shamed into it by exposure of the conditions at Walter Reed, which we never wanted to happen!" :applause:

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 10:02 PM
Response to Reply #102

103. If you don't act by Friday

Supplies will be gone. So order now! :eyes:

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Patsy Stone

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Mon Jan-28-08 10:03 PM
Response to Reply #99

104. That's what supreme evil does to a gal.

:puke:

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Berry Cool

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Mon Jan-28-08 10:09 PM
Response to Reply #104

105. Whew, it's over.

It was definitely Bush's Greatest Flops. New thread, anyone? We can put it in the new one Sharon started when she got back to her hotel room.

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