Arbor Day declares War on Christmas (breaking news)

By I.P. Daily

WASHINGTON, D.C. (Reuters) - The last Friday in April, also regarded as Arbor Day, has declared War on Christmas. With its economy in shambles, many Americans this year opted for the cheaper "real tree" rather than investing in a reusable, artificial tree. As a result, Arbor Day claims that "it had no choice" but to declare formal War on Christmas. "Besides," it said, "Christmas always gets so much PR. No one ever celebrates me anymore....except the Pagans."

A spokesman for the National Arbor Day Foundation (http://www.arborday.org) said that "this senseless slaughter of evergreen trees has to stop. The mainstream media seems more concerned with illegal wiretaps and Presidential civil rights violations than the horrific yearly genocide that takes place each winter in our forests. We support this declaration of War on Christmas by Arbor Day."

A spokesman for FreshChristmasTree.com (http://www.freshchristmastree.com), when asked about their reaction to the declaration of war, simply responded "What in the world are you talking about?"









:sarcasm:

:D

How about an awareness of tree harvesting and the waste of something once alive? I will have to investigate where the "War on Christmas" is really coming from. Something smells bad here.

Ann Arbor.

Don't tell everyone! Christmas will find us and kill us! I know it has spies here at DU...wha?...what's that....

AAAAHHHHHH!!!!

I want to verify your source. And find out if Arbor Day really called for a "War on Christmas". This sounds pretty juvenile.

:sarcasm:

"which way did he go...."

:rofl:

and then you;ll know for sure.

IP Daily.

I. P. Daily

:shrug:

the little elves and the reindeer don't stand a chance!