Republican Rehab:

(light and airy piano music)

"six years ago you thought your friends were honest, decent, christian republicans. but a lot of things have been nagging at you:
that war isn't what they said it was
and if they cared so much about security why'd they expose a c.i.a. agent?
then a bunch of them got caught in a lobbying scandal,
one of them went to jail for bribery,
another is being investigated for insider trading,
the vice president shot a guy,
the president may be spying on you,
and a bunch of their cronies lost new orleans.

wake up. you married into the mob.

call republican rehab. we'll give you a new identity and relocate you and your family to an undisclosed location out of the mobbed-up g.o.p. suburbs of dallas and arizona and into safe, innocent, liberal new york city.
call republican rehab because those people around you really are goons."

randi rhodes show march 14, 2006
http://www.whiterosesociety.org/Rhodes.html