Barak's Bulge

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Presidential candidate Sen. Barak Obama was criticized today for the prominent bulge in the crotch of his pants he revealed to the nation on the Senate floor in last week's Iraq debate.

According to a leading fashion magazine, Obama displayed "an exceptional kind of flourish" even for a man who, in his campaign for president, has given up on his boxy uniform — a black single-breasted suit — in favor of "a slimmer array of suits and jackets" that have allowed him to play "the fashion field".

"Showing off your package is a request to be engaged in a particular way," the fashion magazine said. "It doesn't necessarily mean that a man is asking to be objectified but it does suggest a certain confidence and physical ease . . . and audacity."

"He certainly has some big ones," remarked one republican legislator after observing the package the well-endowed Democratic legislator presented along with his objections to the Iraq occupation. "And he's not afraid to use them, either," he said, on condition of anonymity.

Although the Obama camp strenuously denied the Senator was deliberately showing off his stuff on the Senate floor, one pundit complained anyway that, "For him to argue that he was not aware of what he was communicating by his dress is like 'Smiling Bob' saying he thought he was taking garlic pills, okay?"

That prompted his media counterpart's retort that, "Sometimes a codpiece is just a codpiece."


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Those goddamned liberal democrats are always showing off their "packages" and getting the women. And we still have to pay to have our seldom used and rather average christian cocks dilly dallyed with. Where is the justice in that?