There are more than 3000 US kids (so far), who will carry their ghost parent with them through life

Nikki Engeman receives the Gold Medal of Remembrance in honor of her father John, who was killed while serving in Iraq. (ABC News)

From World News with Charles Gibson
Oct. 29, 2007

Simultaneous ceremonies were held today in Iraq and at the Pentagon to honor the children of a soldier who was killed in Iraq. Few people know about it, but the military now bestows a special medal to children of fallen soldiers, in remembrance of their family's sacrifice.

In Baghdad Monday, the United States recognized a battle-hardened Lt. Patrick Engeman. His father, John, was killed last year in Baghdad by a roadside bomb, and Engeman, who now serves in Iraq, was honored with the Gold Medal of Remembrance. "Thank you for taking the time to recognize the service, the sacrifice that my dad made ... thank you," was all Engeman's emotions would allow him to say at the ceremony.

Engeman's sister, Nikki, was also honored with the medal at the Pentagon. The remembrance medal is a relatively new honor, and one that no one would actually want. More than 3,000 sons and daughters — many of them quite young — have lost a parent in Iraq and Afghanistan.

snip.. http://abcnews.go.com/WN/story?id=3792429

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Nikki could lose a brother, in addition to the loss of her Dad.

and what about MOM? She lost her life-partner, and could yet lose her son too..
Once the rah-rah fever wears off, she and her family will be just like so many Viet Nam era families who still long for a few more minutes with that ghost Dad or Mom or sister or brother.

These families are permanently scarred for life. They can never really heal. Every veteran's day , every birthday, every Mother's Day, Father's Day, Anniversary, every Memorial day. Every Christmas..and every "anniversary" of the day they were killed will be spent remembering the things they wish they could forget, but never can. Once dad is dead..or Mom..they are always dead...

Their lives will be spent, perpetually picking those scabs of loss, every few months.

If they are active military, once the initial phase is past, they will lose their support system on-base, because they must now re-enter "civilian life". Those kids lose friends and schoolmates and their cocoon of base living.

If the soldier was a reservist, there is still no escaping that whatever the insurance "payment" is these days, is NO replacement for a parent's life and contribution to a family, over their should-be lifetime.

If lives are lost in a "meaningful war" ..a necessary war, at least the ones left behind can take solace in the fact that the death was not in vain..

These left-behind kids will no doubt spend their lives coming to terms with the fact that their parents may have been sacrificed on the altar of hubris & raw greed.

I'm not impressed.

How dumb is this ceremony?

.:(

and all I got was this lousy teeshirt." This is supposed to relieve the pain of loss, how?