"Proud to Be an American"--Alternative lyrics?

For a while, people were posting alternative lyrics to Lee Greenwood's "God Bless the USA." Now I can't seem to find them (I did an archival search).

I wonder how people would rewrite them now that * has gotten SOOO much worse....

From the album "Young and Rich"



I’m proud
To be an american
I’m proud
Of the groovy things we’ve done
There’s television, free religion, rock ’n’ roll, standard oil,
Times square, jimmy darren, corey wells, and smokey bear,
Price reduction, reconstruction, peace corps, and lots more
Culture that we got to lend

I’m proud
To be an american
And I’m proud
Had a great time bein’ one
There’s your school and my school and both of us in high school,
Surfboards, cigarettes, homework, southern comfort
Boy’s dean was real mean,
Made us keep our locker’s clean
Failed nearly every class
Ditchin’ was a gas

I’m proud
To be a young american
I’m proud, just think about it
All the far out things that we’ve begun
There’s revolution, constitution, land, sea, and air pollution,
Cold wars, hot wars, gas wars, and confrontutions,
Constipation, consternation, open hearted palpatations
Muscular dystrophy

I’m proud to be an american
Because we got department stores
Full of cheap guitars
But when sputnik plays ’em, you just go go go go

I’m proud to be an american--we got two chickens in every garage
And I wish every other kid could be one--in my country,
The medium is the massage
’cause it’s impossible to give
Equality and justice to inferior foreigners
Too jealous to trust us

Gimme your weak and your homeless
How ’bout checkin’ the oil ah, fella?

I’m proud to be an american

GOD HELP THE USA - lyrics by Pat Riot

Today it seems the things are gone I counted on in life
Propaganda spread through mainstream press and papers full of lies
I pray to my lucky stars that the tide will turn back soon
Cause our flag is soaked in oil and blood and it's turning into fumes

I'm embarrassed to be an American where they say we're proud and free
And 100, 000 Iraqis have died for democracy
And I'd sadly stand up next to you and defend my right to say
Cause there ain't no doubt I loved this land God Help the USA

From the cargo holds of civilians to the hooded shame we see
Across the lands of Islam they’re praying that we'll leave
From Pakistan Iraq Iran down to Guantanamo Bay
Well there's shame in every American heart and its time to stand and say

I'm embarrassed to be an American where they say we're proud and free
Where our boys and girls are being trained to torture detainees
Held without rights or legal claims to fight their hostage fate
Injustice rots our very core God help the USA

I'm embarrassed to be an American where they say we're proud and free
And 100, 000 Iraqis have died for democracy
And I'd sadly stand up next to you and defend my right to say
Cause there ain't no doubt I loved this land God help the USA

Thanks Berrybush! :hi: