Let's give thanks for what we have, right before we out and buy a whole shitload more than we need

So Thanksgiving is here, the day where America is thankful for what they have. That is of course until they start going through their withdrawals. It's like people wake up in the morning and are all ready to give thanks, but then they realize that they are Americans and they can't merely be thankful for what they have, they need more. So they cook a gigantic meal because they can't have just enough food, they need way way more than anyone can possibly eat. That is the American way. People fill themselves up with excess food, and then get ready to go shopping, until they realize the tragedy...all the stores are closed. They start to have withdrawals. They have had enough of being thankful, they need to get their fix. And so they all go line up outside the store at some obscene hour of the morning just waiting until they can stop being thankful and resume their mass consumption again.

The doors open at the wee hours of Friday morning and everyone is eager to satisfy their craving to buy more plastic crap. People go crazy and fights break out over the sale items, people were going through withdrawal after being forced to be merely content with the massive heaps of food they gobbled up the previous day, they needed to buy something and they weren't about to see someone else get the item they wanted.

And the war on Christmas begins. Fox News begins their assault on anyone who dares mention the treasonous words "Happy Holidays". How dare those politically correct bastards suggest someone should be happy throughout the holidays! You shouldn't be happy during the holidays you should be pissed off like Bill O'Reilly is, that is how you give people a merry Christmas!

See the right-wingers have done a great job at cheering for the war in Iraq, but most of them have not been so eager to go fight in it. They couldn't go to Vietnam, they can't go to Iraq, but they can justify sending other people to die if they are soldiers themselves. So they enlist themselves as soldiers to protect Christmas from being assaulted by all those who utter the words of the devil, "Happy Holidays".

Eventually Christmas comes, and no doubt because of Bill O'Reilly's valiant efforts Christmas is saved every year. And despite the fact that people didn't get reminded to have a Merry Christmas enough times for the liking of the religious right, most people from a Christian background still remembered to celebrate the holiday even if they were really wasted. Who knows though, if Bill O'Reilly wasn't around to drill Merry Christmas into their heads they may have forgotten.

And so Christmas comes and America thanks their families, for buying them the crap they will throw into the closet the very next day. We may have maxed out our credit cards, we may have ended up with all kinds crap we don't need and don't know what to do with, we may have to face months of financial burden because we spent more than we can afford to spend. But we keep spending, because that is the American way.

Happy Holidays...ahhh I mean Merry Christmas. Wait it's not Christmas yet. Oh never mind, you know I mean.

I just picked up a 27.74 pound turkey.

Biggest bird I've ever bought. Organic too! Cost a fortune.

to a 'Black Friday' free-for-all.
Don't plan on starting either.

That much of that shit load of plastic crap people will be buying before dawn on Friday is toxic and made by slave labor in China. Where IS the FDA when you need them? (Oh, wait, GWB gutted them, didn't he? Never mind.)

let's be unpredictable and not buy nothing at all, we have to strike them in the pocketbook.

I proudly honor Buy Nothing Day. I do admit though that I will buy food because that is kind of a necessity and the grocery store does not suffer from Black Friday madness. I certainly will not be going anywhere near the big boxes though.

Everyone is getting hand knit socks for Christmas.

zalinda

That is a great analogy of the economics of Christmas.

I talked my wife out of doing the black friday hysteria. In years past I have had to go and stand outside the store of choice at 4 AM which isn't early enough to be even in the first 100 people at most places around here.
I have been the designated mob attendee as my wife works retail and has to be on the inside of the mobs.
I told her this year, I didn't see anything that we just had to have, that I would go about 8:00 or so and if there is anything left that I see as a bargain, then I will get it.

What a relief, not have to get up and drag my butt out there in the rain and snow and wait for hours to bust down doors and get mauled.